- Oct 1, 2017
- 2,475
- 6,111
Sex with a pregnant lady. "Husband edition"
Early in the pregnancy: Great. Sex like teenagers. All day everyday.
In the middle of the pregnancy: Less frequently sex encounters and lots of oil massages against strech marks and "no you don't look fat" speeches.
At the late stages of pregnancy: "You look like you swallowed multiple bowling balls. Like a puffer fish."
Days before the birth: Yes i got everything under control and the bags are packed already. Yes i rub your feet, belly, back. You lactating again. Yes they got bigger. No......ok i admit it but i just wanted to know how it tastes. I aint weird....you are.
Again Women? Stop touching me ffs i aint a machine and now go to sleep. (apologizing 20 seconds later)
And ofc waking up to sex alot.....
But hey. I understand it is not for everyone. But a pregnant lady is basically the female version of a dude who takes viagra for 9 months at an all you can fuck buffet.
The difference is at the end women bring a new human to this world which is a beautiful and amazing experience.
If we guys take viagra for 9 month in an all you can fuck buffet most of us would drop dead 1 week in. 2 weeks top.
And what is this about 48 and not being able to have children anymore? Has this information reached eastern european ladies yet? Or latinas? You just have to stare at them for to long and boom pregnant.
Early in the pregnancy: Great. Sex like teenagers. All day everyday.
In the middle of the pregnancy: Less frequently sex encounters and lots of oil massages against strech marks and "no you don't look fat" speeches.
At the late stages of pregnancy: "You look like you swallowed multiple bowling balls. Like a puffer fish."
Days before the birth: Yes i got everything under control and the bags are packed already. Yes i rub your feet, belly, back. You lactating again. Yes they got bigger. No......ok i admit it but i just wanted to know how it tastes. I aint weird....you are.
Again Women? Stop touching me ffs i aint a machine and now go to sleep. (apologizing 20 seconds later)
And ofc waking up to sex alot.....
But hey. I understand it is not for everyone. But a pregnant lady is basically the female version of a dude who takes viagra for 9 months at an all you can fuck buffet.
The difference is at the end women bring a new human to this world which is a beautiful and amazing experience.
If we guys take viagra for 9 month in an all you can fuck buffet most of us would drop dead 1 week in. 2 weeks top.
And what is this about 48 and not being able to have children anymore? Has this information reached eastern european ladies yet? Or latinas? You just have to stare at them for to long and boom pregnant.
