VN Ren'Py Limitless [Day 6 P4 Completed] [Cr8tive M3dia]

[bobdillan]

films? What films?

films as in singular not plural. another example "One of my favourite snacks" (is also singular).

If you are asking about the film though, "Limitless" is the name (although don't expect too many similarities, it is loosely based on it).

 

[Smurf.alt.cranium]

Is this on Android??

Yeah

 

[Smurf.alt.cranium]

Dev Please let this have a harem ending with the option to get all the girls pregnant and the Mc and all his woman live in his big mansion in his huge bed. That would be so dope and like no sharing of girls with other guys If so make it optional. No ntr pls too

 

[eldoen]

films as in singular not plural. another example "One of my favourite snacks" (is also singular).

If you are asking about the film though, "Limitless" is the name (although don't expect too many similarities, it is loosely based on it).

bag of blue pills check, sim drug name check, expand mind, only hinted at so far in story but stock market success and accessing memory from childhood, are rather good indications. out of sorts guy that starts in mediocrity and excels check

going to have to watch the movie again, to remember other things the tv show and movie are just a bit to far in the past recall anything but the gist. but overall, I would say, an excellent 3rd protagonist in the limitless world so far.

 

[bobdillan]

bag of blue pills check, sim drug name check, expand mind, only hinted at so far in story but stock market success and accessing memory from childhood, are rather good indications. out of sorts guy that starts in mediocrity and excels check

going to have to watch the movie again, to remember other things the tv show and movie are just a bit to far in the past recall anything but the gist. but overall, I would say, an excellent 3rd protagonist in the limitless world so far.

Don't bother with the TV show. (they kinda fucked up the lore as well, since the movie basically had it where the dude didn't need pills anymore, but the tv show undid that because they needed to for its plot).

Not to mention the show was canned.

Movie is still great though.

 

[laBeind15]

The dominance stat shows how much the MC is dominant right ?

 

[Cr8tive M3dia]

The dominance stat shows how much the MC is dominant right ?

The Submissive stats on each LI page shows how Submissive they are, the Dominance stat shows how Dominant they are. There won't be any femdom before you ask, or maledom... the submissive stats is purely there to show how much persuasion or influence you can have over a LI, in the way of say Rita making her not take a morning after pill, or say Libby being a little more adventurous with the MC if higher.

With regards to the Dominance stats that will mainly be for different dialogues if they are more dominant that not.

 

[BTLD]

The dominance stat shows how much the MC is dominant right ?

think about it this way
the stats show how the LIs feel about MC
so if they have high dominance that means they will behave in a more dominant way with the MC
if they have high submissive that means they will be more inclined to do what MC wants them to do

 

[OutOfFuxs2Give]

Well we've had three days so far and he said that there are a hundred of them, so it will be a while. But he'll be wanting to either find a way to get more, or preparing to retire from his trading and things in about three months. And then explaining to the girls how he suddenly goes from a powerful, motivated go-getter, to a lazy beach-bum loser overnight.

If they base it off the movie then he will get to the point where he doesn't need them anymore

Edit: Just as bobdillan said a few posts before me.

 

[LGM]

Well, reading this was quite an adventure.

This is in dire need of a proofread. All my favorites are here: missing periods, missing or misplaced commas, missing apostrophes (havent), writing two words as one (infront), writing one word as two (near by), not capitalizing the beginning of a sentence, not capitalizing "I", abbreviating "okay" with "ok" (which just looks incredibly bad in a sentence), using the wrong there/their/they're and your/you're.

Plus, some of the writing just sounds unnatural. When "suddenly", something completely expected happens, it's not really sudden, is it? And sometimes, it's like two different writing styles show up in the same sentence. For example:
"As soon as Cindy brings me over them stock and shares books, we can commence..."
Here, the MC uses "them" to replace "those", which he does all the time, and which is quite informal. Yet in the same sentence, he uses the comparatively grandiose word "commence" rather than "begin", "start", or (probably the most natural) "get started".
Whiplash moments like this are not super common, but there are a few of them.

There's also a small inconsistency. On day 3, when visiting the convenience store, the MC acts like he's been there before even if he hasn't, both when getting there and later when talking to Steve, mentioning he met Josie.

Overall, I think this is worth reading, albeit headache-inducing in its current state. I'll keep my eye on it.

I suppose I can give one more piece of criticism. The phone seems to take up a lot of room considering its apparent uselessness. I quite enjoyed having a small button in the corner of the screen on day 1, but having that massive thing taking up most of the right edge of the screen seems a bit unnecessary. I will admit, this probably annoyed me more than most other people, because I have a habit of parking my cursor at the right edge of the screen so I don't see it, and as it is now, I always have to out of my way to pull it down from there in order to keep playing after Alt-Tabbing back into the game.
My point is, maybe you could make the phone smaller, maybe reduce it to a button? Just a suggestion.

 

[MRMIdAS2k]

Not sure if this is a bug or not, but despite having 20 Rita submission on either path, you can only make her kiss Naomi on the Pregnant path.

Either the pregnant path should give her more submission, or the non-pregnant path should give her less submission if it's not a bug, but I'd like a non-pregnant route to have the same options as a regular route as much as possible.

 

[MrFriendly]

In the last update I kept switching between my two saves - No Naomi and Naomi... I don't want Naomi to insert herself into every relationship but then I also like Naomi... So back and forth, back and forth. LOL

Anyway, great game so far, looking forward to more.

 

[VepsrP]

Not sure if this is a bug or not, but despite having 20 Rita submission on either path, you can only make her kiss Naomi on the Pregnant path.

Either the pregnant path should give her more submission, or the non-pregnant path should give her less submission if it's not a bug, but I'd like a non-pregnant route to have the same options as a regular route as much as possible.

No, it's not a bug. You don't need 20 submission points. You need a high-submission trigger.

 

[MRMIdAS2k]

No, it's not a bug. You don't need 20 submission points. You need a high-submission trigger.

Then why bother having it say "Submission not high enough" or whatever the exact text is? it not being high enough implies if you get enough submission points, it'll trigger, not that it's route exclusive.

 

[Cr8tive M3dia]

Then why bother having it say "Submission not high enough" or whatever the exact text is? it not being high enough implies if you get enough submission points, it'll trigger, not that it's route exclusive.

It wasn't a bug, the trigger to persuade Rita to Kiss Naomi at the beginning of the store scene, is that Rita is "Highly Submissive", which is only obtained on the pregnancy path. However you can later on in the scene at the end when leaving convince her to kiss Naomi or not.

 

[Cr8tive M3dia]

Well, reading this was quite an adventure.

This is in dire need of a proofread. All my favorites are here: missing periods, missing or misplaced commas, missing apostrophes (havent), writing two words as one (infront), writing one word as two (near by), not capitalizing the beginning of a sentence, not capitalizing "I", abbreviating "okay" with "ok" (which just looks incredibly bad in a sentence), using the wrong there/their/they're and your/you're.

Plus, some of the writing just sounds unnatural. When "suddenly", something completely expected happens, it's not really sudden, is it? And sometimes, it's like two different writing styles show up in the same sentence. For example:
"As soon as Cindy brings me over them stock and shares books, we can commence..."
Here, the MC uses "them" to replace "those", which he does all the time, and which is quite informal. Yet in the same sentence, he uses the comparatively grandiose word "commence" rather than "begin", "start", or (probably the most natural) "get started".
Whiplash moments like this are not super common, but there are a few of them.

There's also a small inconsistency. On day 3, when visiting the convenience store, the MC acts like he's been there before even if he hasn't, both when getting there and later when talking to Steve, mentioning he met Josie.

Overall, I think this is worth reading, albeit headache-inducing in its current state. I'll keep my eye on it.

I suppose I can give one more piece of criticism. The phone seems to take up a lot of room considering its apparent uselessness. I quite enjoyed having a small button in the corner of the screen on day 1, but having that massive thing taking up most of the right edge of the screen seems a bit unnecessary. I will admit, this probably annoyed me more than most other people, because I have a habit of parking my cursor at the right edge of the screen so I don't see it, and as it is now, I always have to out of my way to pull it down from there in order to keep playing after Alt-Tabbing back into the game.
My point is, maybe you could make the phone smaller, maybe reduce it to a button? Just a suggestion.

Thank you for the comments, I really do appreciate it, as it makes me know I have got some errors and grammar issues to correct. English lessons were never my forte at school as you can probably tell and even though I have had people check it over for me, things have been missed.

I might look at the next update to post a message up on the forums here to get some proofreading done, think that might be the best option.

You are probably the only person that has gone down a route with no Rita and no Lateshya and then not actually visited the store and met Josie. This I believe is the only way in which you would not have met Josie, lucky I actually had a actual route done that way

I'll look at correcting/inserting the correct dialogue for that route so the MC isn't mentioning Josie if he has never met her. Thank you again for that

I might be able to see if I can add a little phone symbol to the top left so you can toggle between seeing it at the side of the screen or not. I'll have to see if my coding skills will stretch to that.

 

[Valmora]

Alright... My opinion of this VN...
So far it's extremely interesting... I like the whole pill thing, sure it was taken partly from a Tv show and that's fine, the affects of the pills are only the tip of the idea from the Tv show...
Nice start as well, directly into some good story and sexual content, always a plus...
The pregnancy part, added plus, looking forward on seeing how that's drawn out...
Very much looking forward in seeing how the story develops in the near future...
It has some nicely chosen DAZ models with some great body mods that fit and aren't "over the top", the renders are pretty good...

I only have one bad thing to say and it's not the writing, it's the grammar and wrong word usage, that seriously needs to get fixed, so you need to get an english speaking proofreader, derped up dialogue really messes a good VN...
One other thing, the actor image in dialogue as well as in the phone, you need to go back through your coding, there are several places it's messed up, some showing the MC not cleaned up even though that had already happened as well as a few showing MC cleaned up although it hadn't happened yet, I think there were a few of the rest of the actor portraits mishaps, not quite sure if it was coding mistake or rather it was blinking over from dialogue changeover...

 

[Master of Puppets]

In the last update I kept switching between my two saves - No Naomi and Naomi... I don't want Naomi to insert herself into every relationship but then I also like Naomi... So back and forth, back and forth. LOL

Anyway, great game so far, looking forward to more.

There should have been an option to keep his relationship with each of them separate, though I didn't choose it. Does that not work?

 

[Cr8tive M3dia]

There should have been an option to keep his relationship with each of them separate, though I didn't choose it. Does that not work?

There is the option for the LI's to not be intimate with each other and only the MC.. but there isn't the option that they are completely separated and say the end scene doesn't happen with 3 of them. That would be a nightmare for me to work out and design as well as make updates take a long long time as I would need even more routes and images to create for each scene that could or couldn't involve LI's or not.

There is the option that the LI's don't do anything sexual with each other (Except at one point Rita kisses Naomi even if you didn't want her to be Bisexual at all (This doesn't cause her to become Bisexual) but I will look at amending that for players who don't want the LI's to even kiss each other)

 

[sdna1]

There is the option for the LI's to not be intimate with each other and only the MC.. but there isn't the option that they are completely separated and say the end scene doesn't happen with 3 of them. That would be a nightmare for me to work out and design as well as make updates take a long long time as I would need even more routes and images to create for each scene that could or couldn't involve LI's or not.

There is the option that the LI's don't do anything sexual with each other (Except at one point Rita kisses Naomi even if you didn't want her to be Bisexual at all (This doesn't cause her to become Bisexual) but I will look at amending that for players who don't want the LI's to even kiss each other)

yep but optional MMF route is ok to made