So let me get it straight. You're saying I can't distinguish video games from reality and then you start fantasising about sucking or not sucking futa cock? Oh, the irony...
The problem with many a porn video gamers these days is that they live in a simulacra of a simulacra, getting pesonal and emotional about stuff that has little to none relation to the world outside. Nobody says they've been NTRd outside of the H-gaming community--not even the old-school porn addicts obsessing over a particular porn star complain that they don't like when she fucks the dudes they cannot self-insert into.
Just get over it and face the reality, which is sitting in a front of a computer and wasting time on jerking off to badly drawn paperdolls in various states of undress. The paperdolls you haven't even conceived yourself.
