I'll save it for later and give it a second chance but the way the characters interact in the beginning wasn't very appealing. The weird girl that only speaks one word at a time and breaks into MC's room, the goth girl throwing herself at MC at first interaction, the girl in the library that knows everything about him and the beyond moronic interaction between MC and the girl at the expensive restaurant all flowed terribly.
Hmmm, I think I know what you mean, though my feelings are different and I do not have the problem. But since we're talking not objective problems but the subjective feelings invoked by Stawer's writing - without wanting to discourage you, I did not really notice any major changes in the writing style but have not replayed the beginning for a comparison, but I guess the flow or rhythm or whatever of the dialogue stays pretty consistent.
However, the examples you cite, with the possible exception of Charlotte (restaurant) I think is less the writing itself than more the setup of the girls. Yes, they are strange. The idea is to keep wondering who or what they are and find out about it (and a bit of hanky panky too, of course). Especially Yui ("one word girl") and Maxy (goth girl) have a pretty deep background explaining (part of) their behavior, as has the whole world - this is not really "slice of life".
I can understand some of your reservations since I also dislike "girl immediately falling for protagonist", even though I didn't get the same vibes here because it is obvious in the game itself that it makes no sense with the information the player has, so there must be some other reason, unlike the many games "You are a virgin, nobody ever looked at you twice, yet suddenly every girl, woman, and flower pot wants your seed"), but if the opening does not pique your curiosity, maybe the solution also will be uninteresting.
My suggestion would be, once you find the time, to play until the background of the place and the people starts unfolding, maybe wait for Sasha (library girl, she will do a lot of the early exposition) to tell you more - and then decide whether you are hooked or bored.
