I dunno about everyone else, but I don't get too hung up about how "realistic" stuff is in real world terms. I kind of separate it into magic, sci-fi and "erm, sorta real world". I don't have a problem with any of these. Personally I'm in it for the inner monologue of the character and how they react to (admittedly unrealistic, ridiculous) circumstances.
I enjoy the storytelling, but ultimately I'm in it to get my dick hard. If the story is shitty and disjointed enough to give me a flop-on, then I'll drop out. I guess it all just comes down to what you expect from niche erotica. It's all an insane venn diagram of aligning kinks and finding what works.
TLDR: Ultimately my knob is the arbitor of porny stuff. This shit works for me.
Totally get where you're coming from. It's funny, there's a few authors that have the most godawful grammer and writing in general, but they've come up with some kinky scenarios and role swaps that I do find hot.
I've made this rant before, so apologies for those that have already seen these talking points on the old forum.
For me, how distracting something is correlates to how much the story it into attention. For example, early fictionmania stories loved to talk about size 76ZZZ sized breasts and how walking in heels you should walk "toe-heel". It was silly nonsense that you could tell came from people who'd never bothered to do a google search or even have tried crossdressing themselves. To a similar extent, last few years I keep seeing sissification stories where it tries to justify how chastity is supposed to help hide a bulge in skin tight clothing. From first hand experience: No, it can't! Surprise surprise, you lock a hard, undeformable piece of plastic or metal around your ball sack: guess what's no longer flexible enough to tuck away?!
I get it: not everyone has the time, freedom, income, situation where they can actually experiment with what they're discussing. And I also totally get "rule of sexy". There should totally be breaks from reality to facilitate the erotic nature of the work. Of course in erotic fiction, men can get hard again immediately after cumming, everyone can coordinate their orgasms perfectly, and the plot seems to bend to get to the sex.
But my main gripe is the same one I apply to fantasy, scifi, or action movies. If you introduce something, you should be consistent about it. I don't care that it's not "realistic/physical possible" to dodge a bullet at super speed. But if you're gonna introduce that ability, then you damn well better not have that character get caught off guard by a regular human speed punch (or have a damn good justification for it). Or if you introduce a plot point, as an author, you're the one that decided to introduce that into continuity.
And if you do break from reality, it should be a conscious decision, not because you don't know how things actually work. Otherwise, to a person who does know how things do work, it can be distracting at best, and cringe at worst. In those instances, they would have been better off just skipping those details, rather than make it obvious that they have no idea what they're talking about (residual triggering from trying to correct Tokyo Bound, lol)
To be fair to MelissaN, most of my above complaints don't apply to her. Generally, it's the way she handles her characters and their motivations that dissapoint me. And not in the "I didn't find that sexy", as much as often the sexiness was imo sabotaged by missed opportunities. A (not) so temporary roomate has one of the (imo) hottest before and after transformations, but it ends with such a weird non-ending where Destiny just gets gaslit a bit more. Maybe it's just me, but I would have found it hotter if the story committed to an ending. Like if Destiny preferred men now and didn't care about getting back with Sara, or as a fuck you to Sara, Destiny admitted she liked being a woman and decided to tell Steve everything. Or as a fuck you to her family, Sara decided to re-seduce Destiny to screw over the brother she hates. I dunno, just something to show that outside of the physical progression, there was a point to this change.