Hello there chap, hoping you are having a splendid day.
Decided to give your game a gander and see how it plays. Ah, color me impressed friend.
A fair story that seems to only be the start with well-developed characters. While there be some minor issues here and there, I see nothing that you aren't aware of yourself. (Mostly a few grammar mistakes, likely due to the language barrier)
Considering this game seems a bit early for its life, I say the story it has is dandy for its current stage.
The current advice I shall give would be to be a bit generous with time on developing the characters, patience is a true virtue my friend, not everything needs to be rushed.
Pleasantly excited to see how this one plays out. Til next time friend~
(P.S. To the Mod who has to endure my insanity, I humbly apologize... unless you're eating popcorns with kernels in it.)