lmao, the cheating route is hilarious.
"Oh shit, I fell asleep. My girlfriend is missing and there's the sound of people fucking coming from that room. Probably nothing."
"Oh shit, I fell asleep. My girlfriend's still missing and there's the sound of people fucking coming from a different room. Damn, I'm tired."
"Oh shit, I fell asleep. Girlfriend's still missing, but at least I have this video of her grinding on a guy's dick, and I can still hear people fucking in the other room. Probably noth-zzzzzzzzzzz"
"Blast and damnation, the insidious claws of fatigue once again closed around my consciousness! My betrothed is nowhere to be seen, but surely this is no cause for alarm. That charming African fellow - who has so ardently declared his desire to "give her a proper dicking", whatever that means - is with her and surely up to nothing nefarious! Hark, the sounds of copulation from yonder chambers, ah the vigor of youth! I hope my beloved returns anon so I may enquire with her as to the pursuit of marital relations, for my penis yearns for stimulation."