VN Ren'Py Project Myriam - Life and Explorations [Ch. 5.12+p] [Zorlun]

[Skjall]

... to my irl life, as an artist and gallery manager, ...

I think I know which roof scene was written from personal experience then.
Damn son. Good job man.

 

[DIRTY FILTHY Animal]

I'm totally fine with Marc not going full-on asshole to the extent that Anthony did. I had no problem with Anthony's content, and would have no objection to more content with him in the future,

How could you let Anthony back with Myriam? He tried to murder her and shot her in the face! But that’s ok with you cause you miss him beating and choking and raping your ass right? You think he’s the only one that can give her rough sex, if she meets him again, it better be in jail or the morgue, cause he deserves Texas chainsaw massacre treatment!

 

[doccop63]

Zorlun, I commend you. You are a helluva lot more gracious than I could ever be. At a certain point with all of this griping, I'd announce that I was packing up my toys and taking the exclusive route but not before leaving some very choice words for the gripers. Your response alone makes you one of the Greatest devs in this forum. I wish you continued success as you go forward. Bravo.

 

[Zorlun]

Zorlun, I commend you. You are a helluva lot more gracious than I could ever be. At a certain point with all of this griping, I'd announce that I was packing up my toys and taking the exclusive route but not before leaving some very choice words for the gripers. Your response alone makes you one of the Greatest devs in this forum. I wish you continued success as you go forward. Bravo.

Trying to be in any way... ^^

But even if I'm not of the same opinion, when things are written down politely and not just meant to get a raise out of me, I don't have much reasons to be an asshole. I understand that players tend to make the game their own, even more so when your goal is to make the player more involved with how the heroine act.
Sure without a doubt I like positive returns (who doesn't like a good polish ^^ ), but critical ones are also interesting (in small dose please ^^ ) to help you work, I changed a few things in the game by listening to returns and advices I got since I started the game. That doesn't mean I won't be doing what I want with the game, but listening in at least never hurt.

 

[Kassan06969]

Trying to be in any way... ^^

But even if I'm not of the same opinion, when things are written down politely and not just meant to get a raise out of me, I don't have much reasons to be an asshole. I understand that players tend to make the game their own, even more so when your goal is to make the player more involved with how the heroin act.
Sure without a doubt I like positive returns (who doesn't like a good polish ^^ ), but critical ones are also interesting (in small dose please ^^ ) to help you work, I changed a few things in the game by listening to returns and advices I got since I started the game. That doesn't mean I won't be doing what I want with the game, but listening in at least never hurt.

*Heroine. Heroine = female hero. Heroin = illegal drug.

 

[Zorlun]

*Heroine. Heroine = female hero. Heroin = illegal drug.

The sad thing is that even in French you put a 'e' in the end... (In French: Héroïne.)
Shame on me!

 

[Takkatakka]

The sad thing is that even in French you put a 'e' in the end... (In French: Héroïne.)
Shame on me!
View attachment 2615617

Funny enough "Heroin" is missing the "e" because it is actually the German version.

120 years ago, the company Bayer (the producer of Aspirin) thought it would be great against coughing:

 

[Six0]

Six0 ; It is nearly imposible for a Male, to write a Female character out of the sight of a woman, there are games where this is achieved with good storys and nice renders, in those mostly the significant other of the creator has and active roleo or influence , or there are woman in the team, which asses and help to mold the story,
Other good games are writen and produced by women straight away.
I feel that doccop63 sugetion that you contact the dev and offer him suggestions from your perspective is the best,

A good writer can write any kind of character. Man, woman, trans, black, white, asian, etc. All you have to do is a bit of research and most of all, avoid stereotypes. When you put them in a box is when you start showing your true colors. Like a writer who thinks women are beneath males will portray her as being submissive to them regardless of power dynamics. Animals don't rape humans, therefore a dog should not be dominating one. Nor should a boy be dominating a grown woman (especially his mother).

The game start with a MC very submissive at start, so any femdom from her point of view will take time to come up, as all the lesbian content did as she start with a man at first.

So again, all I can say is patience.
-
One of the goals was actually to make her more complicated than just slutty, prude, submissive or dominant, and be able to have her be a mix of those, enjoying one time to be submissive and another enjoying to be in the boots of the dom; to be able to be slutty when she wish and slap the shit out of someone another time.

For the extra thoughts coming from other characters, it happens with males or females, and just serve to build the ambiance, but I get that it can be felt as annoying when you only wish to view the game via the MC.

Sorry, but I have little faith in how you're going to handle femdom from Myriam's point of view. The fact that you make the options that boost her dominance the non-sexual ones speaks volumes. It tells me you're the kind of person who thinks femdom means footjobs and CBT instead of facesitting and cunnilingus.

Your comments sounds borderline man-bashing. Why don't you send suggestions from a female perspective on Zorlun's Discord account if you want a different perspective. As it sounds now, you're statements are inciteful. Also keep it mind, it is his First time doing this. He's learning as he goes and he's been Very nice in his responses to his audience. Sly insults and man-hating certainly does you no good for a favorable outcome.
And as I said a few pages earlier in this thread, he can't Possibly please everybody. If the games that you have come across have storylines That offensive to you, why not do what I've seen a couple of females do: start your own story and introduce it here. That way, you can tell and display a plot and story the way You want. I fear that all of you unhappy people are going to make Zorlun go exclusively private with this on SubscribeStar and Patreon. Once again, keep in mind, he's nice enough to Share his work here. He doesn't get paid here to take yours or anyone else's abuse.

And there it is, like clockwork. There's always the guy who thinks anybody advocating for better female characters, or doesn't jive with the male characters presented, must be a woman. And one who hates men. Well that's where you're wrong. I'm not a woman, but I do hate men. And I hate whenever a female protagonists has to share her story with them. Which happens all too often via writers illustrating what every man who crosses her path is thinking. You don't see that happening often with male protagonists. So it's particularly egregious when a female protag has to momentarily relinquish the agency she has over her own story to a nobody like the pizza guy or that spying store clerk.

 

[Joshy92]

Will there ever be a romance path with Marc that isn't submissive or dominant does anyone know because i like the thought of Marc and Myriam
Being in more of a loving relationship

 

[Power Broker]

Marc contrary to his father had a glimmer of hope of not becoming a full on asshole.

Anthony abused Myriam in order to boost his own ego, he needed her natural submissive nature to get what he wants- the moment he screwed up or she showed a glimmer of resistance and spine, he fell apart and turned into a pathethic beggar and liar. That's not the kind of behaviour I would consider to be "in control" or "confident", let alone "dominant".
I think the question should not be about "assholery", because being an asshole is sometimes necessary and good, and sometimes just a question of taste or viewpoint. It should be about character traits and personality.

If Marcs character development was intented to make him less of an asshole, I think this would be the wrong motivation. It should be more about making him confident, competent and in control, first of himself and only after that of Myriam (and the other women around him). From there, there are many paths possible (from nice to abusive), but making him weak and pathetic in order to not make him an asshole is a bad direction to take.

It's just character development

It's more like character assassination. Dom Marc was interesting because he was NOT the sniveling, whiny boy that exist in every porn game with younger characters, and he was interesting because he dominated his mother and was not dependend on her cuddling and affirmation. Unfortunately, he turned into this cliche and was stripped of all what made him interesting.

but things can always shift as I work and get inspired).

Well, I have an idea for Marc and how to get him back on track, and also for Cassius, just let me know if you are interested. But I don't have Discord and I'm a dirty pirate, so no subscription either.

For the cop dates, depending on choices made during the first double date, the situation can evolve in four manners,

I never encountered the single dates.

 

[Power Broker]

Well, I admit I tried even to probe Zorlun about a visit from Myriam to the boys in hospital (with potential "consolation", of course ), but no luck, they were meant only as a plot element.

Pity, this would have been a great way for character development, as in "Myriam doesn't date losers who can't control themselves, she is more interested in bold teenagers than in wannabe doms who beat up weaker people".
Oh yeah, I hope the cops lost their job due to this incident.

 

[Power Broker]

Funny enough "Heroin" is missing the "e" because it is actually the German version.

Well, no. It's German, but it's a merger from the Greek heroios ("hero" or "strong") and the suffix "-in" for pharmaceutical drugs (as in "Aspirin" or "Penicillin"). No e's were hurt during the creation of this word .

 

[Takkatakka]

Well, no. It's German, but it's a merger from the Greek heroios ("hero" or "strong") and the suffix "-in" for pharmaceutical drugs (as in "Aspirin" or "Penicillin"). No e's were hurt during the creation of this word .

It is the German version as in "you don't speak it with an e, so you don't write it with an e".

 

[Zorlun]

Sorry, but I have little faith in how you're going to handle femdom from Myriam's point of view. The fact that you make the options that boost her dominance the non-sexual ones speaks volumes. It tells me you're the kind of person who thinks femdom means footjobs and CBT instead of facesitting and cunnilingus.

Again, Myriam start the game as submissive, very, so at start the dominance choices for her is when she's able to say no and affirm herself, and not going straight to smothering the guy's face with her pussy, but as the lesbian relations took time, the femdom will take time, she start light and it will build up. Again, time.

Anthony abused Myriam in order to boost his own ego, he needed her natural submissive nature to get what he wants- the moment he screwed up or she showed a glimmer of resistance and spine, he fell apart and turned into a pathethic beggar and liar. That's not the kind of behaviour I would consider to be "in control" or "confident", let alone "dominant".
I think the question should not be about "assholery", because being an asshole is sometimes necessary and good, and sometimes just a question of taste or viewpoint. It should be about character traits and personality.

If Marcs character development was intented to make him less of an asshole, I think this would be the wrong motivation. It should be more about making him confident, competent and in control, first of himself and only after that of Myriam (and the other women around him). From there, there are many paths possible (from nice to abusive), but making him weak and pathetic in order to not make him an asshole is a bad direction to take.
It's more like character assassination. Dom Marc was interesting because he was NOT the sniveling, whiny boy that exist in every porn game with younger characters, and he was interesting because he dominated his mother and was not dependend on her cuddling and affirmation. Unfortunately, he turned into this cliche and was stripped of all what made him interesting.
Well, I have an idea for Marc and how to get him back on track, and also for Cassius, just let me know if you are interested. But I don't have Discord and I'm a dirty pirate, so no subscription either.
I never encountered the single dates.

I don't see it that way, but again I guess it's a question of taste and perspective, sorry to say but best I can say now is still wait and see.

 

[Blurpee69]

Anthony abused Myriam in order to boost his own ego, he needed her natural submissive nature to get what he wants- the moment he screwed up or she showed a glimmer of resistance and spine, he fell apart and turned into a pathethic beggar and liar. That's not the kind of behaviour I would consider to be "in control" or "confident", let alone "dominant".
I think the question should not be about "assholery", because being an asshole is sometimes necessary and good, and sometimes just a question of taste or viewpoint. It should be about character traits and personality.

If Marcs character development was intented to make him less of an asshole, I think this would be the wrong motivation. It should be more about making him confident, competent and in control, first of himself and only after that of Myriam (and the other women around him). From there, there are many paths possible (from nice to abusive), but making him weak and pathetic in order to not make him an asshole is a bad direction to take.
It's more like character assassination. Dom Marc was interesting because he was NOT the sniveling, whiny boy that exist in every porn game with younger characters, and he was interesting because he dominated his mother and was not dependend on her cuddling and affirmation. Unfortunately, he turned into this cliche and was stripped of all what made him interesting.
Well, I have an idea for Marc and how to get him back on track, and also for Cassius, just let me know if you are interested. But I don't have Discord and I'm a dirty pirate, so no subscription either.
I never encountered the single dates.

I'm curious. Have you or someone close to you ever gone through a traumatic event like having a gun pointed at you or someone you love? Fired at someone you love? I ask because I have, and Marc's reaction here seems very natural and mirrored what my friends and I all went through.

 

[doccop63]

A good writer can write any kind of character. Man, woman, trans, black, white, asian, etc. All you have to do is a bit of research and most of all, avoid stereotypes. When you put them in a box is when you start showing your true colors. Like a writer who thinks women are beneath males will portray her as being submissive to them regardless of power dynamics. Animals don't rape humans, therefore a dog should not be dominating one. Nor should a boy be dominating a grown woman (especially his mother).


Sorry, but I have little faith in how you're going to handle femdom from Myriam's point of view. The fact that you make the options that boost her dominance the non-sexual ones speaks volumes. It tells me you're the kind of person who thinks femdom means footjobs and CBT instead of facesitting and cunnilingus.


And there it is, like clockwork. There's always the guy who thinks anybody advocating for better female characters, or doesn't jive with the male characters presented, must be a woman. And one who hates men. Well that's where you're wrong. I'm not a woman, but I do hate men. And I hate whenever a female protagonists has to share her story with them. Which happens all too often via writers illustrating what every man who crosses her path is thinking. You don't see that happening often with male protagonists. So it's particularly egregious when a female protag has to momentarily relinquish the agency she has over her own story to a nobody like the pizza guy or that spying store clerk.

 

[doccop63]

To be clear, nowhere in my response did I say or allude that you were female. Re-read it. I simply said that you were borderline man bashing and I also said that if you had feedback from a female perspective to send it to Zorlun's Discord page. It is Damned Tiring reading everyone's personal gripes about life in general as it pertains to the game. It's a freaking porn game, a fantasy for Pete's sake. Being suggestive about it is one thing but too many of you add your personal darknesses to the critique.
So you hate men? You need therapy. Since you so profoundly stated that you're not a female, you have issues that no amount of entertainment, game, comic, movie whatever, will satisfy because you hate yourself. That means that whatever issues you have you project it on others. Me personally, I refuse to let anyone rent space in my head to make me hate them. Trust me, between my time in the military and law enforcement, I could have good reason to but I don't. Take a chill pill, seriously.
Once again, Zorlun's a FIRST TIMER. He hasn't claimed to be an expert or great at what he's doing. Even the Great writers started out with not so good material. It takes trial and error to be great. You're putting your own expectations on a person who's admitted that he's learning as he goes. I'm a first time writer and, trust me, getting characters and situations just right ain't easy. My 2 dozen failed drafts is my proof. Take a Deep Breath and don't take this game too seriously.

 

[I-No]

So I understand the disappointment, but all I can say is be patient and I hope you keep enjoying the game as it grow.

I was with you from day one. I enjoy to see her story and even though I still think she's departing from her "natural self" (which made her so appealing in the first place) ofc I will continue to watch and promote it.

And in the end I know it's hard to find the exact game for any one as a player, it was kind of what pushed me to try my own in the first place. ^^

I think can imagine the difficulties. But with "Project Myriam" you were ticking many of the right boxes already.
Even if those are getting fewer.
But I know...
Patience!

Not my strongest feature though.

 

[TheLecher]

How could you let Anthony back with Myriam? He tried to murder her and shot her in the face! But that’s ok with you cause you miss him beating and choking and raping your ass right? You think he’s the only one that can give her rough sex, if she meets him again, it better be in jail or the morgue, cause he deserves Texas chainsaw massacre treatment!

Oh, did he try to murder her? I must have missed that plot point. If only it had been a cliffhanger ending three updates ago and then taken up a significant part of the dialogue for the last two updates, then I might have been aware. But yes, it's okay with me that he tried to kill her, as long as he failed. He's one of the villains in this story, and he's supposed to do bad things. As long as he fails in the end, and Myriam gets a good ending, then all's well.

But who said anything about wanting to see him get back together with her? I certainly didn't. I said that I had no objection to more content with Anthony in the future. That doesn't mean that I want to see them reunite as a couple. You really jumped to conclusions there.

As for Anthony beating and choking and raping my ass, you do realize that I'm not the MC of this game, right? Do you self-insert and play as Myriam? I sure as hell don't.

A good writer can write any kind of character. Man, woman, trans, black, white, asian, etc.

It appears that there is one thing on which we agree.

All you have to do is a bit of research and most of all, avoid stereotypes. When you put them in a box is when you start showing your true colors. Like a writer who thinks women are beneath males will portray her as being submissive to them regardless of power dynamics. Animals don't rape humans, therefore a dog should not be dominating one. Nor should a boy be dominating a grown woman (especially his mother).

"Most of all, avoid stereotypes." We certainly don't agree on that. If you had said something like, "As a general rule, avoid stereotypes," then I would have been inclined to agree. But writing a character to fit a stereotype is not always bad writing. Sometimes it's good writing, particularly when it serves the story and resonates with the reader. The problem arises when stereotypes are used as a substitute for characterization, or when stereotyping is overused.

With regard to power dynamics, you seem to be suggesting that power dynamics never get reversed, or that they should never be reversed, or that it's bad writing to portray a power dynamic reversal. It's not entirely clear to me which of these is your intended argument, but I wouldn't find any of them convincing.

I'm not a woman, but I do hate men.

Anyone who hates an entire people group is a bigot and a fool.

 

[blarg0192]

A good writer can write any kind of character. Man, woman, trans, black, white, asian, etc. All you have to do is a bit of research and most of all, avoid stereotypes. When you put them in a box is when you start showing your true colors. Like a writer who thinks women are beneath males will portray her as being submissive to them regardless of power dynamics. Animals don't rape humans, therefore a dog should not be dominating one. Nor should a boy be dominating a grown woman (especially his mother).


Sorry, but I have little faith in how you're going to handle femdom from Myriam's point of view. The fact that you make the options that boost her dominance the non-sexual ones speaks volumes. It tells me you're the kind of person who thinks femdom means footjobs and CBT instead of facesitting and cunnilingus.


And there it is, like clockwork. There's always the guy who thinks anybody advocating for better female characters, or doesn't jive with the male characters presented, must be a woman. And one who hates men. Well that's where you're wrong. I'm not a woman, but I do hate men. And I hate whenever a female protagonists has to share her story with them. Which happens all too often via writers illustrating what every man who crosses her path is thinking. You don't see that happening often with male protagonists. So it's particularly egregious when a female protag has to momentarily relinquish the agency she has over her own story to a nobody like the pizza guy or that spying store clerk.

There are several points I agree with you on, but you come off like such a prick I don't want to.