I think that it is pretty simple. The amount of games available is limited, so even as someone that isn't into NTR, checking NTR games and asking "Is the NTR avoidable?" is one way to still find more games to play. Some games have an NTR option, but it isn't the core of the game, and is avoidable, in those cases those games can still offer a lot of enjoyment even for the NON-NTR crowd. On the other hand there are plenty of games where NTR is the core of the game, and avoiding it isn't possible. For those games the NON-NTR crowed is unlikely to enjoy the game. Then there is even this new thing I have noticed lately (with the GREATLY increased number of NTR games coming out) which is NTR games, with NTR at the core, that have either really half-assed "NON-NTR" routes (with heavy NTR tones the whole time), OR when you chose the "NON-NTR" route you just cut the vast majority of the games content (renders/animations) from the game. Both of these are things I try to avoid as well, but again that is just my personal preference.
So, again, it isn't about kink shaming, or trying to pressure devs into adding things, or changing things, to be different then they envision for their games. It is more about asking for some clarity about a tag that can encompass a lot of different things, and be handled in a lot of different ways, so that potential players can make an informed decision about how they spend their time. Honestly, it's no different then if someone wants clarity on a Threesome tag, or a Futa/Trans tag, not everyone is going to see MMF and MFF the same, and not everyone is going to A) Think of Futa and Trans as the same thing, and B) be open to Futa-on-Female, Futa-on-male, and Male-on-Futa the same. I picked the "Futa/Trans" tag in particular as an example because it is another one that seems to be pretty polarizing like NTR.
Long story short, the tags aren't enough to really paint a picture about what the game is, and asking for clarity shouldn't be seen as "kink shaming". It really is no different then ordering food and wanting clarity about what comes on/with the food (or what ingredients are used) incase there is something you don't enjoy, or that you can't have for health reasons.
