I do sincerely wish to maybe have some lines or some mentions of how the assassin's/mafia's dealings interact with the normal society. This could for example how the mafia has some moles in the government intelligence agency or how some politicians/officials are somewhat bribed
The writing is quite smooth. There is a good harmony between renders and description talking about what happens and meanwhile showing it. Sometimes I do stumble a bit with the delayed auto-text but nothing bothering me too much. I guess it is simply me being too fast of a reader at times and clicking too early.
Something that I'd personally recommend maybe is to have a little watermark logo or icon to hint at an animation / timed image progression happening, as I sometimes mistakenly skipped those and had to roll back 1-2 slides. This would be a huge QoL improvement.
Something that bothers me greatly, but this is just a personal quirk of mine are the 'Tsks'. I personally feel those things are used way too much. I get it to have it sometimes, but not every fucking scene. Especially not in thoughts. And what bothers me more is actually 99% of the time people never react to 'Tsk'. I mean even if there is merit to using it as it does convey a certain feeling quite well, the sound this tongue clicking does is audible to others and pretty much disrespectful in most scenarios. I feel like the story and writing will not suffer if it is used less and therefore more impactful and if there is actual reaction to it. Imagine having a MC doing a 'tsk' towards someone prideful he needs to work with/want something from, and due to this 'tsk' the prideful person just plainly refuses to cooperate because he/she does not let themself be disrespect without solid justification.
I will consider these suggestions to the heart.
Sicae's cast so far is quiet varied with the ongoing theme of everyone in this dark story having their own baggage. And this is something that just goes well with the theme of the story.
*Unfortunately I do stumble often over the MC's writing. Not because I wanted to self-insert and he does not represent me in my ideal fantasy but rather because sometimes I simply can't follow the thought process / development / actions of the MC.
There is a little mismatch as to what I perceive in regards to consistency. I do understand the early aversive silent archetype due to backstory of being kidnapped having his gf in front of him (although being blindfolded) sexually assaulted and then having her go missing. He drowned in his sorrows with the help of alcohol and only due to Eliza helping him cope and slowly recover he gained his footing.
Now with the visual update to his model I somehow feel the writer did change or at least the archetype the MC leans on did switch over night. The silent aversive type suddenly evolved into a cocky/extroverted leader type. It somewhat feels like the maturity of the MC did decrease by a lot.
Like, when Irene was gone there was no mention of him hunting down the perpetrators on his own but rather just delegating this to Lisa and Seth. On the other hand, when Seth died he just wanted to run out of the room and do ... something? The emotional reckless revenge archetype is not that easy to switch to, especially if you are groomed into assassinhood as a child.
I mean I understand his dad died, but the reaction to his death feels out of propotion to what happened back to Irene, who he professed his love to and was in a relationship with.
Finally I do understand and like the more sexual dominance of MC and the same dominant character development in the last part as MC does resolve himself into being the head of clan and following Seth's philosophy.
This is one of my issues in this game. Along with finding a stable footing for the story, so is having trouble finding a stable footing for MC's personality to match the story. I still have so, so much to learn myself. But I will try my best to make him consistent from now on. As to the sudden change in Ep5-6, there's none of that. What you see now is the real and honest Lance. Just that he found himself more open now that he has people supporting his back. I call this the
Lisa Effect.
Regardless, his strong, stoic demeanor will most likely trouble not only me but you, my readers, in the later episodes. Being stoic is also not a sign of maturity. You can be an idiot while at it. Trust me, you'll thank me for his more reactions to things than before as soon as we get there. I want him to be more confident, perhaps a little cocky sometimes. Be more of a leader than the passive type. And more importantly, be more decisive and dominant.
Lastly, yes. He did what he could to find Irene and is still doing that. Lisa and Seth only helped him bolster the search. His subsequent reaction to losing Irene, eventually also losing himself in the process, and losing his family is what makes him a human, not just a pixelated character aiming to get revenge and act cool. These are his flaws, and flaws are what makes a character, a character. Flawlessly perfect characters without issues are made to impress you, not to engage you.
