VN Ren'Py The Coven [v0.9] [Former Flame]

[TheFurs]

From what I can see the single biggest problem about him being a potential magic user is the fact that they never bothered to check. Now maybe in the *world* there is no test for it ie blood dna whatever, but to mess with someone's mind changes more than just what he saw. Depending on what was erased, what he was doing, how old he was and so forth its going to change his experiences which could/would change his personality as well. They already said that there hasn't been a male witch in 150 years of course they didn't bother to check. But they should have prior to munching his moelon.
Honestly if I found out magic was real right this moment and I was a warlock I'd be pretty frickin stoked. To find out my family has been screwing up my head...not so much. As for males being dangerous they haven't said anything about why. The only thing that has been said was that he could/would be a target for power hungry witches. Why? because to a witch he is a Duracell. Nothing more than a battery. Apparently each time he cums in a witch she gets a high influx of magic power, which to me kinda sucks...I don't pull out.
I can understand keeping your head down as you get the lay of the land and learn the rules and such but so far there are only 3 maybe 4 girls introduced so far that I would trust. He definitely needs to man up at some point and I'll be here to watch this story unfold. I REALLY like this game, but I want to love it. I just need to be patient and wait to see where the dev takes this. Needless to say even with the few things that bother me I like the looks of the girls, the pace is moving along and the renders look pretty dang good. The story just needs abit more filling out.

 

[UncleFredo]

From what I can see the single biggest problem about him being a potential magic user is the fact that they never bothered to check. Now maybe in the *world* there is no test for it ie blood dna whatever, but to mess with someone's mind changes more than just what he saw. Depending on what was erased, what he was doing, how old he was and so forth its going to change his experiences which could/would change his personality as well. They already said that there hasn't been a male witch in 150 years of course they didn't bother to check. But they should have prior to munching his moelon.
Honestly if I found out magic was real right this moment and I was a warlock I'd be pretty frickin stoked. To find out my family has been screwing up my head...not so much. As for males being dangerous they haven't said anything about why. The only thing that has been said was that he could/would be a target for power hungry witches. Why? because to a witch he is a Duracell. Nothing more than a battery. Apparently each time he cums in a witch she gets a high influx of magic power, which to me kinda sucks...I don't pull out.
I can understand keeping your head down as you get the lay of the land and learn the rules and such but so far there are only 3 maybe 4 girls introduced so far that I would trust. He definitely needs to man up at some point and I'll be here to watch this story unfold. I REALLY like this game, but I want to love it. I just need to be patient and wait to see where the dev takes this. Needless to say even with the few things that bother me I like the looks of the girls, the pace is moving along and the renders look pretty dang good. The story just needs abit more filling out.

Perhaps he didn't manifest magic until later in life than the typical girl. Or perhaps, since there hadn't been a male magic user for 150 years, they simply stopped checking. There are vague suggestions that his sister's magic didn't manifest itself until they reached a certain age, but that doesn't mean their magical ability wasn't detectable much earlier. We simply haven't been given enough information to know.

 

[HansDampf788]

I don't have any plans for mind control going forward it is more of a how do magical and non-magical people coexist without the non-magical world knowing what's going on? Now that the MC is in the magical world hiding magic from him isn't needed. At the moment the MC just left Plato's cave/the matrix and his eyes are still adjusting so he's disoriented. He's also the least powerful person (ATM) in the new world he found himself in. As he finds his bearings I hope things will become clearer and he'll be more of a driver of his own story. I do plan to have him talk to the mother character and hash things out but if you're expecting him to burn everything to the ground that's not going to happen.

The problem is that the damage is already done because the MC was mind-controlled multiple times by his mother and also by Lilith at the first time meeting her. So yes the MC should be absolutely pissed about that and also yes I think he should burn it all down.

As for the GF/Anna she's going to be off having her own college experience. She and the MC are broken up with no hard feelings. I'll look at clarifying that and there will be an option to bring her back in the story later on.

This is another really bad thing she is basically the only sympathetic character at the moment, and now she is just gone that is stupid why have her in the game at all, just for a few quick sex scenes at the beginning.

So, in the end, we have a harem game with 15 females in it (shown in the group picture in the OP) and after 2 updates I don't like 7 of them that doesn't make me confident in the game/dev.

 

[Boehser Onkel]

Thank you for the feedback and I'll try and address some things and hopefully answer some of the other questions I've seen without getting too into spoilers. A lot of what I'm seeing will be addressed in future updates it's just a quirk of this medium being released chapter by chapter rather than the whole thing at once. So things I plan on addressing in the future just raise questions now. I hope you understand this is my first game and a learning experience for me.

I don't have any plans for mind control going forward it is more of a how do magical and non-magical people coexist without the non-magical world knowing what's going on? Now that the MC is in the magical world hiding magic from him isn't needed. At the moment the MC just left Plato's cave/the matrix and his eyes are still adjusting so he's disoriented. He's also the least powerful person (ATM) in the new world he found himself in. As he finds his bearings I hope things will become clearer and he'll be more of a driver of his own story. I do plan to have him talk to the mother character and hash things out but if you're expecting him to burn everything to the ground that's not going to happen.

As for the GF/Anna she's going to be off having her own college experience. She and the MC are broken up with no hard feelings. I'll look at clarifying that and there will be an option to bring her back in the story later on.

The next update is largely Dryad related but I'll try and address a lot of the questions without spoiling where I want the story to go. Even if it takes a few updates.

thanks for the infos
take care

 

[Deleted member 3208170]

The problem is that the damage is already done because the MC was mind-controlled multiple times by his mother and also by Lilith at the first time meeting her. So yes the MC should be absolutely pissed about that and also yes I think he should burn it all down.

Maybe he is like Will Smith and take a Man in Black approach.


Minutes, Days and years. We only knew they erased a few minutes like the Man in Black do.
Give the Dev Time and we will see. Drama yes but don't forget the Porn and the fun. I think burning down is to much.

What I really didn't like was the Lilith scene. I may be very weird and I may be the only one (I don't know) who is greatly bothered by that scene. That scene makes it really difficult for me to enjoy the game...

That's interesting. In German Witchcraft("Hexerei") is called in some literature The craft or art of Lilith("Liliths Art").
Maybe this isn't meant to be pleasant. Lilith is seen as a very powerful and mostly evil witch in German legends. Sorry but I was always in old Legends and stuff.
What do we know so far from the game:

Spoiler

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Maybe Lilith knew from prophecies that there will be a Warlock and has her own plot. Evil like the old German Legends or good intended. That has to be seen.
The Mindfuck scene worked for me (and yes it was unpleasant for me too). Because they wanted to get the proof first.
That's the plot right now and that's fine for me. Maybe it is meant to be unpleasant.
If this is not fun for you. It is ok to stop playing and come back in a few Updates and see how everything has played out.

Thank you for the feedback and I'll try and address some things and hopefully answer some of the other questions I've seen without getting too into spoilers. A lot of what I'm seeing will be addressed in future updates it's just a quirk of this medium being released chapter by chapter rather than the whole thing at once. So things I plan on addressing in the future just raise questions now. I hope you understand this is my first game and a learning experience for me.

I don't have any plans for mind control going forward it is more of a how do magical and non-magical people coexist without the non-magical world knowing what's going on? Now that the MC is in the magical world hiding magic from him isn't needed. At the moment the MC just left Plato's cave/the matrix and his eyes are still adjusting so he's disoriented. He's also the least powerful person (ATM) in the new world he found himself in. As he finds his bearings I hope things will become clearer and he'll be more of a driver of his own story. I do plan to have him talk to the mother character and hash things out but if you're expecting him to burn everything to the ground that's not going to happen.

As for the GF/Anna she's going to be off having her own college experience. She and the MC are broken up with no hard feelings. I'll look at clarifying that and there will be an option to bring her back in the story later on.

The next update is largely Dryad related but I'll try and address a lot of the questions without spoiling where I want the story to go. Even if it takes a few updates.

Thanks for the Post. Wish you luck.
I am excited to see how this story plays out. No Pressure of course.

 

[YogSothoth1982]

That's interesting. In German Witchcraft("Hexerei") is called in some literature The craft or art of Lilith("Liliths Art").
Maybe this isn't meant to be pleasant. Lilith is seen as a very powerful and mostly evil witch in German legends. Sorry but I was always in old Legends and stuff.
What do we know so far from the game:

Spoiler

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Maybe Lilith knew from prophecies that there will be a Warlock and has her own plot. Evil like the old German Legends or good intended. That has to be seen.
The Mindfuck scene worked for me (and yes it was unpleasant for me too). Because they wanted to get the proof first.
That's the plot right now and that's fine for me. Maybe it is meant to be unpleasant.
If this is not fun for you. It is ok to stop playing and come back in a few Updates and see how everything has played out.

If I stop playing for that scene, something that I don't rule out, I don't think I will return unless it changes.

The rest of the game isn't bad (waiting to see how the MC's mind control is justified), but that scene totally annoys the experience of the game to me. In fact, if I quit the game it will be exclusively for that scene and not for anything else.

For me to really be interested in continuing with the game without modifying that scene, the only option that I contemplate is that someone murders Lilith, and if it's possible that he's the MC.

 

[Jimayo]

formerflame

I love the office space reference sir. That was awesome.

 

[linkinn]

The only straight girl is the GF in this game? Jesus Christ.

Don't we have enough of gay girls that turn straight for a few minutes when they see a dick?

 

[Chimba]

The only straight girl is the GF in this game? Jesus Christ.

Don't we have enough of gay girls that turn straight for a few minutes when they see a dick?

Not for long ... it seems that she already fulfilled her role in v.0.1 for the mc to discover magic and in v.0.2 to show a scene from the past but now "she's going to be off having her own college experience" and If she is a witch and goes to another college where there are only witches, she will discover that now she likes women too ....

Spoiler

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[Content_Consumer]

This needs a rape tag for a start.
I've only just got to the nurses office scene and the MC has already been sexually assaulted while unconscious.
That was the second time someone did some kind of mind-control to knock the MC out so it probably needs a mind-control tag too.

Things aren't looking good so far, I'm wondering how long until the fem-dom starts ...

edit:

So is the GF just gone or?
I ask because the first thing I would have done would have been to call her and make sure she was ok since the people around the MC seem to have a knack for lying their tits offs every 3 seconds.
I'm guessing she isn't ok given she didn't call the MC or text or anything unless this has all just been left out of the story for some reason.

Did she even wake up?
If she did, have they mind-wiped her so she doesn't even remember the MC?
Why hasn't she made contact?

This is some whack shit going on.


Also, to make it clear I'm not hating on the story or the Dev, the story actually has good potential, but some things need to be addressed and its better to sort them out early rather than trying to do a retcon later.

I particularly dislike the Lilith scene in the nurses office given the current context.
I personally think it should be changed to not be sexual assault OR some additional context should be added if it is actually important to the plot, since currently it just feels like some sort of weird fan-service. But I don't know who was really hanging out to see the MC get a sleep-handy this early in the story.

As it sits right now, if the MC were to get a bit stabby, then Lilith is at the top of the list for free knife wound recipients.

 

[YogSothoth1982]

I have finished this update.

The first thing is that I'm going to wait to hate the landlady until she explains herself. Either way, I don't see her or her wife as LIs.

The second thing is that, lesbian scenes don't attract me (and I suppose it isn't so common), the truth is that they bore me, so I prefer that if there are, they can at least be skipped. I see a lot of lesbians in the game, and I certainly don't care as long as I don't have to see them in lesbian sex scenes.

The third thing is that I continue to hate the rapist, and personally I prefer that she can be rejected as LI, and also that we can take revenge on her (not sexually, I would not like that either)

 

[Ahchi]

What happen to the MC is not right, It is was bad.
But it could have been a lot lot worse !!
Going by the dialogue and hints within the game he is very lucky to be alive.
As soon as they discovered he has magic he should have been "Put Down".
He has entered a culture where men with magic are a "known" danger,
and he is !, He has an ability he does not understand and can not control.
He barely knows that magic exist while for those around him , it's normal.
While from our point of view he IS being poorly treated,
we must also remember from their point of view
A) He is a threat,
B) He is not their equal,
C) He is an exotic curiosity.
I expect he will still receive poor treatment,
Some will be due to malice but mainly it will be due to indifference !

 

[YogSothoth1982]

What happen to the MC is not right, It is was bad.
But it could have been a lot lot worse !!
Going by the dialogue and hints within the game he is very lucky to be alive.
As soon as they discovered he has magic he should have been "Put Down".
He has entered a culture where men with magic are a "known" danger,
and he is !, He has an ability he does not understand and can not control.
He barely knows that magic exist while for those around him , it's normal.
While from our point of view he IS being poorly treated,
we must also remember from their point of view
A) He is a threat,
B) He is not their equal,
C) He is an exotic curiosity.
I expect he will still receive poor treatment,
Some will be due to malice but mainly it will be due to indifference !

In my case, if the game was heading towards femdom (or maledom), I'd rather know so I can ignore it now.

I agree on points A and C. Not with point B, actually I think that the MC should be considered their equal, at least since they know he has magic.

This needs a rape tag for a start.
I've only just got to the nurses office scene and the MC has already been sexually assaulted while unconscious.
That was the second time someone did some kind of mind-control to knock the MC out so it probably needs a mind-control tag too.

I think the same, the thread needs a rape tag

Things aren't looking good so far, I'm wondering how long until the fem-dom starts ...

I hope that doesn't happen. If not, it would be good for the dev to warn it before for those of us who don't like it.

So is the GF just gone or?
I ask because the first thing I would have done would have been to call her and make sure she was ok since the people around the MC seem to have a knack for lying their tits offs every 3 seconds.
I'm guessing she isn't ok given she didn't call the MC or text or anything unless this has all just been left out of the story for some reason.

Did she even wake up?
If she did, have they mind-wiped her so she doesn't even remember the MC?
Why hasn't she made contact?

The only LI who for sure isn't a lesbian and disappears from the game without further ado ... I hope she returns (I don't know if I really consider lesbians as LIs, and the game seems to be full of them) The other character who seems (although I'm not sure) only interested in the MC proposes him to become sex-friends, emphasizing leaving out all romantic considerations (if it's really like that, and she's a LI that doesn't include a romantic development, then I suppose I will pass of her)

Why does the girlfriend disappear (not a call, not a message, nothing) from the game and the MC doesn't seem to be too upset? It is a mystery to be solved in future updates.

Why doesn't the MC do anything to get in touch with his girlfriend and see if she's okay, how she's doing, etc.? It's another mystery to be solved in future updates.

I particularly dislike the Lilith scene in the nurses office given the current context.
I personally think it should be changed to not be sexual assault OR some additional context should be added if it is actually important to the plot, since currently it just feels like some sort of weird fan-service. But I don't know who was really hanging out to see the MC get a sleep-handy this early in the story.

As it sits right now, if the MC were to get a bit stabby, then Lilith is at the top of the list for free knife wound recipients.

I can only agree with these statements

 

[Osamabeenfappin]

I'm definitely not getting all hung up on the erasing/altering the memory thing. They claimed it was only a couple incidents when the girls first got their powers, and have given a reasonable explanation for it I feel. They have to keep magic a secret. MC knowing about it prior to showing ability to use it doesn't benefit him at all, and potentially puts himself and others in serious danger, with witch hunters and possibly other witches that will see someone non-magical knowing as a liability.

And why on Earth would MC believe them THEY ALTERED HIS FUCKING MEMORIES!!!! Like if someone said hey I altered you're memories a couple of times,why would you assume that's the truth.

What sane rational person would take what an admitted mental manipulator said at face value? Like people don't trust known liars for a reason. And memory erasing is way worse than lying.

I love the rest of this game,but the MC is way to trusting.

 

[Content_Consumer]

but the MC is way to trusting.

Yes, I forgot to touch on this as well, I find a lot of these VNs have MCs who seem to have the IQ of a grapefruit and just accept whatever happens without question.

For example, when the MC asked if Lilith was a doctor and she replied with "something like that", my reaction would not be what the MC did.
She'd have needed more than a light sleep spell to keep me in that nurses' office for sure.



On a side note, imagine what would happen if the genders in the shower scene were reversed ...
It would have been a disciplinary shit-storm, not some kind of 'team building' exercise.

 

[Osamabeenfappin]

Yes, I forgot to touch on this as well, I find a lot of these VNs have MCs who seem to have the IQ of a grapefruit and just accept whatever happens without question.

For example, when the MC asked if Lilith was a doctor and she replied with "something like that", my reaction would not be what the MC did.
She'd have needed more than a light sleep spell to keep me in that nurses' office for sure.



On a side note, imagine what would happen if the genders in the shower scene were reversed ...
It would have been a disciplinary shit-storm, not some kind of 'team building' exercise.

Now having said that,I am enjoying this VN overall. Don't let my bitching offend you. This project has a lot of potential,but the MC is kind of immersion breaking right now,and I look forward to formerflame fleshing this out more in the future.

 

[Content_Consumer]

Now having said that,I am enjoying this VN overall. Don't let my bitching offend you. This project has a lot of potential,but the MC is kind of immersion breaking right now,and I look forward to formerflame fleshing this out more in the future.

I agree, as I said before I'm not hating and I think there is good potential here, its just easier if we can give feedback early and get it sorted before getting too far in.

In my opinion anyway.

 

[Malleee]

Thank you for taking the time to read what I wrote it was a wall of text.

I should go on to say I think you are writing a story with adult content, I think this because of the way you presented the world, you seem to have thought about it a bit. (If this is just supposed to be porn and no real story let us know, it will stop this conversation dead.) The world is an engaging idea, but currently the MC... is the polar opposite of engaging.

Thank you for the feedback and I'll try and address some things and hopefully answer some of the other questions I've seen without getting too into spoilers. A lot of what I'm seeing will be addressed in future updates it's just a quirk of this medium being released chapter by chapter rather than the whole thing at once. So things I plan on addressing in the future just raise questions now. I hope you understand this is my first game and a learning experience for me.

Yeah I do understand it's hard to write a story, I've never written something like this and I have real respect for the effort or I would not be writing any of this. Please don't see this as me being a bastard.

I don't think any of the questions that most of us are asking are related to the future story, nor are many(any?) of us actually interested in getting spoilers, I think the main topic of discussion is right now relates to how the MC is reacting to what has happened.

I don't have any plans for mind control going forward it is more of a how do magical and non-magical people coexist without the non-magical world knowing what's going on? Now that the MC is in the magical world hiding magic from him isn't needed. At the moment the MC just left Plato's cave/the matrix and his eyes are still adjusting so he's disoriented. He's also the least powerful person (ATM) in the new world he found himself in. As he finds his bearings I hope things will become clearer and he'll be more of a driver of his own story. I do plan to have him talk to the mother character and hash things out but if you're expecting him to burn everything to the ground that's not going to happen.

I personally did not think there was mind control, and what I wrote as "bad" suggested internal monologue was how I would likely "Think" if I was suddenly aware people where and had been messing with my head, finding out about magic would raise all kinds of questions about what limits do they have? and I would assume, wrongly in your world, that mind reading/control might very well be part of the powers they possessed.

The MC is way out of his depth, but I can't see the evidence of this in the story.

I would find my self disorientated, angry and trying to find the flaws in my memories, anything I could not remember I would wonder if it was erased, my "Stream of thought" would include all kinds of anger, frustration and expressions of pain, for the MC to be engaging to me, he needs to have some minor recognition of this as internal monologue, and this needs to occur in the already existing chapters. (we're not talking new images, just monologue.)

Lets face it the MC's family have just revealed the biggest betrayal the MC is ever likely to experience, if some part of him is not exploding in pain and denial we're not going to believe the MC is the MC. Unless this is a submissive story, in which case I'm out

As for the GF/Anna she's going to be off having her own college experience. She and the MC are broken up with no hard feelings. I'll look at clarifying that and there will be an option to bring her back in the story later on.

The next update is largely Dryad related but I'll try and address a lot of the questions without spoiling where I want the story to go. Even if it takes a few updates.

Well that info on the GF comes entirely out of left field for me, she seemed heart broken to me, the story suggested to me that they are supposed to have have a real connection, her actions were not those of someone I would associated with being ready to end the relationship as she just offered to throw her future away for him... And then was knocked out... when and where did they have a conversation where all of this was hashed out?

Anyway thanks again and good luck

 

[YogSothoth1982]

I personally did not think there was mind control, and what I wrote as "bad" suggested internal monologue was how I would likely "Think" if I was suddenly aware people where and had been messing with my head, finding out about magic would raise all kinds of questions about what limits do they have? and I would assume, wrongly in your world, that mind reading/control might very well be part of the powers they possessed.

The MC is way out of his depth, but I can't see the evidence of this in the story.

I would find my self disorientated, angry and trying to find the flaws in my memories, anything I could not remember I would wonder if it was erased, my "Stream of thought" would include all kinds of anger, frustration and expressions of pain, for the MC to be engaging to me, he needs to have some minor recognition of this as internal monologue, and this needs to occur in the already existing chapters. (we're not talking new images, just monologue.)

Lets face it the MC's family have just revealed the biggest betrayal the MC is ever likely to experience, if some part of him is not exploding in pain and denial we're not going to believe the MC is the MC. Unless this is a submissive story, in which case I'm out

I'm with you in this.

Personally, if the MC doesn't feel betrayed and angry at what has happened, the story isn't credible to me.

The landlady must earn forgiveness after proving that there were strong reasons for doing what he did, and the MC should show doubts and not trust the landlady or her wife at all at least until they have demonstrated by acts that they deserve it.

Regarding the landlady's daughters, he would surely also include them in the group of people he doesn't trust for now.

Being submissive and accepting everything with ease doesn't convince me at all.

 

[Malleee]

I meant to add 1 more paragraph.

All of the women's actions might be able to be explained away in the coming story, everything they have done might even be extremely reasonable. But for the MC's perspective, as it stands? I can't see how he could possibly believe that.