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Badgerlad

Member
Mar 3, 2020
191
282
My fucking god, the punctuation in this VN is so horrible, my OCD is going crazy. Ever heard of question marks, commas or periods? Jesus fucking Christ.........
It really is on a thin line between "let's eat, grandma" and "let's eat grandma" at times.

Like when you're walking to the dryads and ask if you can't just teleport there. The answer is "No protection spells prevent it". Well then, why the hell are we still walking, woman?
 
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YogSothoth1982

Devoted Member
Jun 26, 2018
8,485
11,664
It really is on a thin line between "let's eat, grandma" and "let's eat grandma" at times.

Like when you're walking to the dryads and ask if you can't just teleport there. The answer is "No protection spells prevent it". Well then, why the hell are we still walking, woman?
A single comma changes the meaning of the entire sentence.
 

-CookieMonster666-

Message Maven
Nov 20, 2018
12,024
17,836
Is it remotely fucking possible for this tool of a main character to get through a single class without fucking it up? He can't even do yoga without losing control of his magic and breaking his own ass. I am so sick of this guy. Like, that scene happens once or twice, fine. But versions of it happen every single class or teaching scene we see. It's getting old and making him look like a real dumbass. Like at some point he actually has to LEARN something, right? Isn't that the point of a school?
Good point. Nobody ever falls many times while learning to walk, sinks many times while learning to swim, or creates lower quality dishes many times while learning to cook. It's completely unrealistic that the MC would fail again and again trying to learn to control something he's completely new to. :rolleyes: It's not a matter of losing control but being unaware of magic happening until it's already in the process. Look at the traffic accident: he had no idea what was even happening, let alone that he was the cause of it. You can't lose control if you don't have it in the first place.
 

Xiomi

Newbie
May 29, 2021
82
45
Can you guys tell me where can i download the android version in this game or this game have android version or not
 

HornyyPussy

Message Maven
Apr 26, 2020
15,413
35,981
Can you guys tell me where can i download the android version in this game or this game have android version or not
Use search in the top right corner, android ports doesn't always show up in the OP (same with compressed versions)

Seems like the one available hasn't been updated to 0.8 unfortunately
 

formerflame

Newbie
Game Developer
Mar 28, 2018
89
1,193
I'll speed up the animations and if I have time go back and speed up some of the old ones. With the grammar, I'm not sure where the problem is without examples. I run everything through Grammarly and ProWritingAid and fix everything they flag before release.
 

doctorx6969

Newbie
Feb 19, 2023
38
30
i am liking this so far.... i hope this story continues and isnt short. There has been a lot of char building and i would hate that to go to waste.
 

Jacowboy

Active Member
Aug 8, 2022
771
912
While I am really enjoying the story, I totally agree with many of the complaints I've seen in the reviews. The story seems disjointed in a dreamlike way. Time skips, and seemingly random location changes happen way too often, and usually without any context.
I have to agree, the story is missing a lot of connective tissue, and the begining is waaay too rushed... That said, the dialogues are very good, the feel very natural and realistic, but yeah, some more transitional/connective scenes are def. needed because as it is it feels a bit jarring when going from scene to scene.

I run everything through Grammarly and ProWritingAid and fix everything they flag before release.
Auto-correctors don't always find all issues, a sentence might be technically correct, but not quite right, as in the example given above:

No protection spells prevent it.

No, protection spells prevent it.

Both sentences are grammatically right, however they mean two completely different things. A comma can change the meaning drastically, but that's thetype of thing an auto-corrector will usually miss, because there's nothing wrong with either sentence.
 

TigerWolfe

Forum Fanatic
Oct 19, 2022
4,092
7,829
I'll speed up the animations and if I have time go back and speed up some of the old ones. With the grammar, I'm not sure where the problem is without examples. I run everything through Grammarly and ProWritingAid and fix everything they flag before release.
I'll try and pass some issues along on the next release I read through if you're open to receiving them, and I see any.
 

formerflame

Newbie
Game Developer
Mar 28, 2018
89
1,193
I plan to redo large sections of the start of the game as I get lulls in my current work. When I first started I left the MC to be a blank slate with the idea that people could self-insert if they wanted to. This has made it so that the MC is a passenger in his own story, which I want to see if I can correct. I think I'm also quite a bit better with rendering/writing now than when I started and would like to smooth out some rough edges.

I've been spending a lot of time trying to figure out who my characters are and what they want. I'm going to try and better convey that. While I think a story is important, it falls flat if none of the characters are that great.

I've had this idea to do a standalone Halloween episode inspired very loosely by Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters from Resident Evil and takes place outside the game's timeline. But that's on the back burner for a bit.
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I'll try and pass some issues along on the next release I read through if you're open to receiving them, and I see any.
That would be great.
 

S1nsational

Engaged Member
Mar 31, 2022
3,452
6,707
I plan to redo large sections of the start of the game as I get lulls in my current work. When I first started I left the MC to be a blank slate with the idea that people could self-insert if they wanted to. This has made it so that the MC is a passenger in his own story, which I want to see if I can correct. I think I'm also quite a bit better with rendering/writing now than when I started and would like to smooth out some rough edges.

I've been spending a lot of time trying to figure out who my characters are and what they want. I'm going to try and better convey that. While I think a story is important, it falls flat if none of the characters are that great.

I've had this idea to do a standalone Halloween episode inspired very loosely by Lady Dimitrescu and her daughters from Resident Evil and takes place outside the game's timeline. But that's on the back burner for a bit.
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That would be great.
Not having MC be a complete blank slate is good, but don't over correct either. Don't give them so strong and rigid a personality that people can't project onto them and that giving players choices would be out of character
 
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Jacowboy

Active Member
Aug 8, 2022
771
912
I plan to redo large sections of the start of the game as I get lulls in my current work. When I first started I left the MC to be a blank slate with the idea that people could self-insert if they wanted to. This has made it so that the MC is a passenger in his own story, which I want to see if I can correct. I think I'm also quite a bit better with rendering/writing now than when I started and would like to smooth out some rough edges.

I've been spending a lot of time trying to figure out who my characters are and what they want. I'm going to try and better convey that. While I think a story is important, it falls flat if none of the characters are that great.
Honestly, I didn't find an issue with the characters as much as the pace and flow of the story, it needs more "breathing room" so to speak. That said, the MC does need some work towards the begining, he's very passive towards the insane shit that's happening to him, I would've expected more shock at the revelations and he's kinda like "ok, sure, whatever", which removes a lot of the weight of the story, imo.
 
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3.80 star(s) 58 Votes