The end of "Tlaero"

[Pervy Lad]

This may be being mentioned in other threads but since I haven't seen it I thought I might as well make a thread dedicated to the retirement of one of gaming erotica's veterans, Tlaero. I think I'll always remember the raw emotion she could evoke in me with her games and how I cried while playing Redemption for Jessika.

What follows is a message posted for the public on their patreon page.

The end of "Tlaero"

It is with a very heavy heart that I make this announcement. If you've read my AMA's here, you know that I've essentially been living a double life for all the time that I've been making these games. It started out very innocently with me looking at a naked animation after my spouse had gone to bed. And it grew and grew into this large endeavor that I've been pouring my time and passion into. When things change gradually, those changes are often hard to see.

Recently, something caused me to do a lot of soul searching. And that led to me shining a bright light on who I am. I started to ask myself, "What am I doing?" My real world spouse is the love of my life, and I've been sneaking around behind his back, devoting time, passion, and an emotional connection to something I couldn't even tell him about. As I thought more and more about it, I came to the extremely uncomfortable realization that I've been cheating on him.

Considering the overarching message in my games, the irony there is ... pretty blatant.

No, I haven't done anything physical with anyone else. But you don't need to have sex to cheat. And, if I'm honest with myself, I've been cheating. I've been with my spouse for an extremely long time, and I know two things. 1) He would not be okay with what "Tlaero" does. And 2) If he ever found out, it would destroy him. I like making these games, but I love him.
I can't keep living this double life. I have to stop. And choosing between the sides? There is no choice.

I'm going to stop being "Tlaero." I'm going to stop writing these games. I'm going to stop posting on erotic forums. I'm going to stop cheating on my real life.
To the over a million people who have played and enjoyed my games, thank you. To the roughly 500 of you patrons who have donated your hard-earned money to help us make our games, thank you from the bottom of my heart. And, most of all, to Mortze, thank you from the bottom of my soul. You're a fantastic artist and the best partner anyone could hope for. You've been a dream to work with, and our games are a testament to that. Anyone would be lucky to work with you.

It's a little known fact that I basically don't take any of the money we get from Patreon. I donate almost all of it to Mortze. Please continue to support him. This is his fulltime job, and he is, by far, the person most hurt by this decision of mine. Mortze, I am so frightfully sorry to do this to you.
I hereby allow Mortze to use our stories and characters in any way he sees fit. Write new stories with them. Rewrite the old ones. Put all the hardcore pictures back into Finding Miranda. Whatever. They're his.

My final game is Darkness Falls Episode 7. It's done and waiting for translation. Mortze will decide when to publish it, and to who. I don't know what I'm going to do with Demon Guard. Maybe I'll just add it to the current public "Tales" link so that people who download AAA will get it too. I'm sorry to leave you folks in the middle of these stories, but this is something I have to do.

Thank you and fare well,
Tlaero

 

[fitgirlbestgirl]

What a weird situation. On the one hand, dishonesty in a relationship is bad, but I don't really get how somebody would be "destroyed" if they found out you like to write erotic fiction. I also don't think keeping the secret and just stopping is going to be a healthy decision in the long term and could easily lead to resentment building up because you had to give up your passion. But what do I know, good luck to them.

 

[Avaron1974]

That's one of the strangest things i've ever read.

It's nothing like cheating, not even close. If that were the case i'm cheating on my girlfriend constantly, I put my time attention and emotional connections into my work, my friends and my porn.

I love my girl, i'd never sleep with anyone else nor would I even entertain the idea of being with anyone else yet, too much info time, i've suffered with PGAD since I was a teenager (that's persistent genital arousal disorder ... yes it's an actual medical condition and yes i'm constantly horny. Not horny like a teenager I mean constantly horny all day every day and I masturbate a LOT) it's not as pleasant as it sounds and despite being open about it here where no one knows me the only people that know IRL are my girlfriend, my twin and my boss (because I can't work when it gets bad she had to be told or I wouldn't have).

That's relevant because of my hobby, which happens to be porn. I read a lot of VN's, Kinetic Novels and play a lot of H games yet neither me nor my girl class any of that as cheating. It's pure fantasy, we all have them.

It would be easy to cheat but porn isn't cheating and nobody could replace my girlfriend, pixels do not count.

He would not be okay with what "Tlaero" does.

Like it or not Tlaero is part of you and always will be. One day you will look back and realise that no matter what, your partner would never accept you for who you are and you lie to cover that up. Does any of that sound like a healthy relationship to anyone else?

Unless you can be 100% up front with the one and only person you are in love with then your relationship is a sham built on lies and half truths.

Here's the last part of where my condition ties in. I could never be with someone who doesn't accept everything about me because I can't change for anyone. I'm not going to lie to make their life easier and I would never hide part of who I am to make someone else happy. In the end that would make me miserable.

I'm not trying to interfere in a relationship but I do know that living your life to please someone else isn't going to work forever and giving up something you love will only end in resentment.

It's fine for a while but eventually something is going to give.

I hope not. While I haven't had many dealings with Tlaero she's always come across as nice and I hope she is happy and everything works out for her.

I've just seen far too many instances of the opposite happening. Hopefully she proves me wrong and kills a bit of the cynic in me.

 

[Roman DeVil]

...one way or another, this is a big and sad loss for all of us ero-players! Personally i hope she'll think again about it, but this is a decision that only Tlaero can make!

Best of wishes to you, "The Lady", and good life! You'll be missed so much!

 

[LP83]

This is sad. Tlaero games are one of the very 1st ones that introduced me into the erotic games. Sucks to have her go. I hope she can find her peace by leaving her alter-ego behind.

 

[Winterfire]

People demonize porn too much

 

[Ragnar]

Shame, Tlaero is a good writer, but she has to live the way she wants.
Thanks for the games.

 

[HopesGaming]

Wish her the best

 

[ZagorTeNay]

I'm not one to judge people, b-u-t.. your partner would see something like this as "cheating"?
There are countless erotic/romance novels that are more "personal", taken from "I", clearly reflecting author's personal fantasies/desires or based on real events. Hell, same could be said for most movie actors. Or you could find this even in bloody religious texts.
Rant off: I really wish Tlaero the best. Some of the best writing and most memorable characters in this genre. You will be missed.

 

[MVMVM]

I like her style of writing very much. It is a shame, she certainly has a gift in the craft of writing, but ultimately it is up to herself to decide whether to work in these or not and I respect her decision. If something is weighing down inside that surely can effect the writing.

Funny how that old song "Parting Glass" has been ringing in my head these couple of days before I heard this news...

Wishing her all the best on her future endeavours.

 

[hax]

so sad to hear that, they are basically the first game i starting playing... wish her the best

 

[hax]

People demonize porn too much

like recently sony about ps4 games

 

[freedom.call]

Hard to keep a secret from loved ones for a long long time, eating away.

 

[Walg]

Hard to keep a secret from loved ones for a long long time, eating away.

Especially one for as long as @Tlaero has. She's been writing for ages, long before F95 was born.

Like many here, I was sucked into the storylines that Tlaero had and was so glad that I was. @Tlaero's one of those writers that many gravitate towards. I get that she thinks it's cheating but like what @fitgirlbestgirl said, to think that your partner would be "destroyed" by this revelation would mean her partner's not willing to listen and compromise. Isn't that a part of all good relationships?

If you take it a step further, it's actually something @Tlaero may have to mull over in the future - She might have thoughts of her @Tlaero life coming back to "haunt" her, which is where @Avaron1974's line about being 100% honest with your partner comes into play. But it's her decision so all we can do is respect it.

@Tlaero, wish you the best for your RL and your future and thank you for all the adventures that you've taken us through. You'll be sorely missed.

 

[Olivia_V]

I'm not a super fan or anything, but @Tlaero has always been a good writer and her team with Mortze has been a model of game dev efficiency and candor. I wish she'd do this for longer, if only to provide a model of best practices for the fledgling devs here, especially with the attention she gives to story.

That said, I do understand where she's coming from. "Cheating" is not something that happens on merely a physical level. I'm rather surprised about the dismissive hand waving on the issue by some here. One of the first great signs that somebody has checked out of a relationship is that they're freely devoting a lot of time and energy (erotic energy even) into something that is both unnecessary (i.e. not job related) and deliberately excludes you, even if you did say you were okay with them dabbling. That person becomes more emotionally invested in this other thing and with other people than the one she's supposed to be with. This is, like, marriage counseling 101. That @Tlaero is self-aware enough to perceive it and her decision to prioritize is a sign of great maturity, and I doubt a decision taken this freely and with this much thought will build resentment. I think there'd be more resentment built from hiding it, then comparing your emotional validation from this other thing to the faults of your real world partner. Heck, even when you're not hiding it...

May you find happiness on your way @Tlaero , and good luck in your marriage and your future endeavors! Your writing and your stories will continue to be an inspiration.

 

[Mark17]

Man what a bummer

I've been fan of Tlaero since LOP games gold age (rough 8 years ago) well before of F95 even been just kickass torrent user, it's probably because of that I continue to play erotic/porn games and I will overstretch her, but because of them (LOP, Tlaero, Ariane date and vdate games) there is this "boom" of porn games today

They says The Best Things Come in Small Packages. And I think they right Tlaero give a game in every 6 months and is a great thing it's complete, it's great graphics, great storytelling for porn game and HTML was easy to use

But nothing lasting forever not even a game dev Whoever it is Tlaero, I hope she's doing what she's love and live happily with she's love, she's definitely deserves

 

[fitgirlbestgirl]

One of the first great signs that somebody has checked out of a relationship is that they're freely devoting a lot of time and energy (erotic energy even) into something that is both unnecessary (i.e. not job related) and deliberately excludes you, even if you did say you were okay with them dabbling. That person becomes more emotionally invested in this other thing and with other people than the one she's supposed to be with. This is, like, marriage counseling 101.

If your notion of a healthy relationship is "go to work and then spend every other waking minute with me" I'm sorry for whoever you're with. Unless they are into that, then great, I guess. To me that sounds like torture. In my opinion it's absolutely vital to have "alone time" and a hobby that doesn't involve your significant other.

That @Tlaero is self-aware enough to perceive it and her decision to prioritize is a sign of great maturity, and I doubt a decision taken this freely and with this much thought will build resentment. I think there'd be more resentment built from hiding it, then comparing your emotional validation from this other thing to the faults of your real world partner. Heck, even when you're not hiding it...

The mature thing to do would be to come clean and to negotiate a compromise instead of completely cutting a meaningful way of creative expression out of your life because of some ill-conceived notion of having to make it up to your partner.

Continuing to lie and pretending that you aren't going to miss the creative outlet that has given you so much pleasure over the years doesn't seem like "a sign of great maturity" to me, more like a recipe for future unhappiness.

 

[Avaron1974]

I'm not a super fan or anything, but @Tlaero has always been a good writer and her team with Mortze has been a model of game dev efficiency and candor. I wish she'd do this for longer, if only to provide a model of best practices for the fledgling devs here, especially with the attention she gives to story.

That said, I do understand where she's coming from. "Cheating" is not something that happens on merely a physical level. I'm rather surprised about the dismissive hand waving on the issue by some here. One of the first great signs that somebody has checked out of a relationship is that they're freely devoting a lot of time and energy (erotic energy even) into something that is both unnecessary (i.e. not job related) and deliberately excludes you, even if you did say you were okay with them dabbling. That person becomes more emotionally invested in this other thing and with other people than the one she's supposed to be with. This is, like, marriage counseling 101. That @Tlaero is self-aware enough to perceive it and her decision to prioritize is a sign of great maturity, and I doubt a decision taken this freely and with this much thought will build resentment. I think there'd be more resentment built from hiding it, then comparing your emotional validation from this other thing to the faults of your real world partner. Heck, even when you're not hiding it...

May you find happiness on your way @Tlaero , and good luck in your marriage and your future endeavors! Your writing and your stories will continue to be an inspiration.

Tlaero has all but said her partner can't accept all of her so she's living a lie to keep him happy.

That's not mature nor is it healthy that's divorce 101.

 

[Olivia_V]

If your notion of a healthy relationship is "go to work and then spend every other waking minute with me" I'm sorry for whoever you're with. Unless they are into that, then great, I guess. To me that sounds like torture. In my opinion it's absolutely vital to have "alone time" and a hobby that doesn't involve your significant other.

I didn't say any of that. I said that if you're devoting too much time to an exclusionary activity wherein you're expending a lot of energy (including erotic energy that really should be channeled toward your partner), then it is absolutely unhealthy. "Me time" is good, but if "me time" becomes all the time, as consuming hobbies tend to demand, then you're in trouble. And the best person to determine that she's spending too much time on this is the person who is actually spending the time, which is Tlaero herself.

The mature thing to do would be to come clean and to negotiate a compromise instead of completely cutting a meaningful way of creative expression out of your life because of some ill-conceived notion of having to make it up to your partner.

Continuing to lie and pretending that you aren't going to miss the creative outlet that has given you so much pleasure over the years doesn't seem like "a sign of great maturity" to me, more like a recipe for future unhappiness.

People make sacrifices all the time. I've seen wives sacrifice entire careers for their husbands and families, husbands give up sports, the arts, jobs, and other meaningful, self-defining things for their wives and families, and while that would be misery to many of us, many of those who make the sacrifice have found it worthwhile. Maybe she loves her spouse enough to go the full mile instead of a compromise. She's the one in the relationship after all. We've become so self-centered that sacrificing parts of ourselves for others seem unimaginable. We've romanticized people who cut off family members who disagreed with who they can love (I've certainly done my fair part), and yet cannot process cutting off a hobby.

Tlaero has all but said her partner can't accept all of her so she's living a lie to keep him happy.

But is she, really? She's probably more honest with herself and what she wants to do than all of us. Her truth seems to be, "I love my partner, flaws and all, more than I do this hobby". Is it really so alien than she can willingly and wholeheartedly part with this part of herself out of love?

 

[polywog]

We all have affairs, life would suck, if we couldn't. I should probably qualify that by saying that you can have a relationship with a book, or a house-plant, a soap-opera, music, art, sports, hobbies. For a reader, it might just be a fling, but as a writer it takes on new dimensions.

Long before you were married, you were an individual, and getting married doesn't change that. 1+1 =2 Marriage is an institution, and it requires commitment, but being committed to an institution 24/7 can make you crazy. You each have needs as individuals, and it's unrealistic to expect your partner to fulfill all of your individual needs. The flip-side is blaming your husband for not making you happy, when you are perfectly capable of making yourself happy. No husband in his right mind, is going to fault his wife for being passionate, so long as some of that passion is shared with him. Only you can judge if you went too far and strained your relationship, and I wish you all the best in repairing it. 100% honesty is never possible. The truth hurts, granted some people enjoy misery, but most people want to be happy and that requires encouragement which sometimes takes the form of little white lies. Like when my gf asked "do these jeans make my butt look big?" and I would respond

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Marriage isn't a compromise, it's a partnership, building each other up, supporting one another, not tearing each other down.
Giving up what you love is beyond compromise it's sacrifice, and that isn't healthy for either of you. Having a hobby is cool but you need to set boundaries, limits, pace yourself, take vacations, take care of yourself. If the whole truth is too much to bare, then reinvent yourself, on an acceptable level. That's a compromise but.... 20% of a growing concern is better than 100% of a bankruptcy. You owe your fans nothing, it is they who owe you.