Srslysims sets the milliseconds between each game cycle lower. Turbo unclogger cancels out actions that get stuck. Coolspears mods sets the milliseconds and the cooldown between each action & pancakes smooth llama fix sets priorities for sims. Selected sim gets top priority, household sims get next then NPC's. I use coolspears stuff, unclogger and pancakes mod together and went from having a menu lag and sim select lag of 15 seconds down to 2 or less on large ass lots full of bullshit clutter and having 25 sims on lot. All of that depends on your CPU and what it can handle. If you have an i7 4ghz or some shit you prolly never get simulation lag unless you have 50+ sims on the 64x64 lots with a ton of shit
Also the main reason Sims 4 lags like this is because it does not handle actions right. Theres way too much going on between a sim starting an action and concluding it inc extra bullshit ambient animations EA throws in. It calculates routing on the fly so more objects means more calculations... then on top of it is the cycles and the timeouts. It helps to decrease this but also sometimes breaks animation timing. Like the clusterfuck funny story or dramatic story it goes on too long then a sim decides to do something they "multitask". Go do that something, teleport back to sitting and reacting to the sims dumb tale then pop back to walking away lol. I've been looking into a one fix solution to all of this in python but the lack of proper code for much of the stuff that happens in the game makes it difficult. Like there is no real way to destroy interactions in a sims queue only a cancel that just lingers in there. Only way to clear out a sims queue is to reset them. WHICH is a huge reason they get stuck.