VN Ren'Py A Father's Sins [Ch. 30] [Pixieblink]

4.20 star(s) 56 Votes
Discussion Reviews (56)
S

Smilingjack4

Newbie
Feb 26, 2019
77
285
I got hooked thanks to the great writing, and I'm invested enough to care about the story, so I have one piece of criticism.
Maddy listing the signs of the end times is very underwhelming.
So many wars? Like always.
Africa starving? Like always.
Tsunamis and tidal waves? Every 5 years or so.
The viruses that killed fewer people than the plague or the spanish flu or smallpox? Even mentioning Covid? Just lame.
With all this human population is still growing out of control, so if this is the apocalypse divine and infernal beings can do, I'm not fucking impressed. It reminded me too much of televanglists blowing mundane things out of proportion and telling you to save your soul by giving them money.

But it's told from Maddy's perspective, so there is absolutely room for introducing more danger, and as I'm writing this just as I read it, it's possible this issue is already resolved. (I just hope it's not some vague prophecy that gives away the ending)

The other observation I have is the Borderlands-style animations when a main character is introduced. Be mindful that even by giving away an adjective about the character you strip yourself of the chance to show the characters behavior instead of telling it, making the characters actions predictable. Take the Cardinal's example: "master manipulator". I did not need to be told that. Especially since you showed it so well by him indebting you with the money and trying to win you over to his side by housing you in a loft. Then when the MC remarks on this in his internal monologue is enough to make the...slower readers catch on as well.

Otherwise, great job! I especially like that the MC is definitely capable in his own right, (as shown by inspecting Maddy at first glance).
 
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S

Smilingjack4

Newbie
Feb 26, 2019
77
285
Smilingjack4 said:
I got hooked thanks to the great writing, and I'm invested enough to care about the story, so I have one piece of criticism.
Maddy listing the signs of the end times is very underwhelming.
So many wars? Like always.
Africa starving? Like always.
Tsunamis and tidal waves? Every 5 years or so.
The viruses that killed fewer people than the plague or the spanish flu or smallpox? Even mentioning Covid? Just lame.
With all this human population is still growing out of control, so if this is the apocalypse divine and infernal beings can do, I'm not fucking impressed. It reminded me too much of televanglists blowing mundane things out of proportion and telling you to save your soul by giving them money.

Never you mind all of the above, as the scene continues, it blew me out of the water! Fully appreciating shit like this is why I studied literature.
Click to expand...
 
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Pixieblink

Pixieblink

Engaged Member
Game Developer
Jul 13, 2019
2,452
5,780
Dylan741 said:
Not exactly memento is an object used to remember a fact or an occasion and to an extention is used as synonym but the most correct latin word should be either recordor [rĕcordāris, recordatus sum, rĕcordāri] or reminicso [ rĕmĭniscĕris, rĕmĭnisci]. :)
Click to expand...
Uh, I am the only one feeling a little undereducated right now? :oops:
I wish I would have known that BEFORE I googled all those latin words.

reminicso would have sounded way cooler than memento
 
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Pixieblink

Pixieblink

Engaged Member
Game Developer
Jul 13, 2019
2,452
5,780
UncleFredo said:
I hope you appreciate that my comments were intended as (hopefully) constructive feedback. This is your story and I fully support that you are free to tell it as you see fit. As I said, I'm looking forward to where you take this, Huge potential here. Simply huge. It will be hard to wait for updates.
Click to expand...

Absolutely. You would be amazed how little REAL feedback you get when creating a game.

Sure, players will mention they liked this, or didn't like that. But it's hardly the same thing as someone taking a step back, looking at it as a whole and offering good advice on the storyline or future paths.

So thanks, and feel free to drop me a comment and/or suggestion any time.
 
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Q

qarnac

Newbie
Jul 4, 2019
60
27
Anyone else having trouble starting after chapter 2?

Code: 
I'm sorry, but an uncaught exception occurred.

While running game code:
  File "renpy/common/00action_file.rpy", line 452, in __call__
    renpy.load(fn)
Exception: Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?

-- Full Traceback ------------------------------------------------------------

Full traceback:
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 28, in script
    python hide:
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\ast.py", line 914, in execute
    renpy.python.py_exec_bytecode(self.code.bytecode, self.hide, store=self.store)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 2028, in py_exec_bytecode
    exec bytecode in globals, locals
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 28, in <module>
    python hide:
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 35, in _execute_python_hide
    ui.interact()
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\ui.py", line 297, in interact
    rv = renpy.game.interface.interact(roll_forward=roll_forward, **kwargs)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\core.py", line 2702, in interact
    repeat, rv = self.interact_core(preloads=preloads, trans_pause=trans_pause, **kwargs)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\core.py", line 3518, in interact_core
    rv = root_widget.event(ev, x, y, 0)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\transition.py", line 47, in event
    return self.new_widget.event(ev, x, y, st)  # E1101
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\screen.py", line 714, in event
    rv = self.child.event(ev, x, y, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 962, in event
    return handle_click(self.clicked)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 897, in handle_click
    rv = run(action)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 320, in run
    return action(*args, **kwargs)
  File "renpy/common/00action_file.rpy", line 452, in __call__
    renpy.load(fn)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\loadsave.py", line 770, in load
    log.unfreeze(roots, label="_after_load")
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1983, in unfreeze
    self.rollback(0, force=True, label=label, greedy=greedy, on_load=True)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1815, in rollback
    self.load_failed()
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1733, in load_failed
    raise Exception("Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?")
Exception: Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?

Windows-8-6.2.9200
Ren'Py 7.3.5.606
A Father's Sins Chapter_IV
Tue Apr 05 21:24:52 2022
 
Hordragg

Hordragg

Lesser-Known Mesmer
Donor
Compressor
Apr 2, 2019
2,936
10,555
qarnac said:
Anyone else having trouble starting after chapter 2?

Code: 
I'm sorry, but an uncaught exception occurred.

While running game code:
  File "renpy/common/00action_file.rpy", line 452, in __call__
    renpy.load(fn)
Exception: Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?

-- Full Traceback ------------------------------------------------------------

Full traceback:
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 28, in script
    python hide:
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\ast.py", line 914, in execute
    renpy.python.py_exec_bytecode(self.code.bytecode, self.hide, store=self.store)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 2028, in py_exec_bytecode
    exec bytecode in globals, locals
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 28, in <module>
    python hide:
  File "renpy/common/_layout/screen_main_menu.rpym", line 35, in _execute_python_hide
    ui.interact()
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\ui.py", line 297, in interact
    rv = renpy.game.interface.interact(roll_forward=roll_forward, **kwargs)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\core.py", line 2702, in interact
    repeat, rv = self.interact_core(preloads=preloads, trans_pause=trans_pause, **kwargs)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\core.py", line 3518, in interact_core
    rv = root_widget.event(ev, x, y, 0)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\transition.py", line 47, in event
    return self.new_widget.event(ev, x, y, st)  # E1101
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\screen.py", line 714, in event
    rv = self.child.event(ev, x, y, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 998, in event
    rv = i.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, cst)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\layout.py", line 244, in event
    rv = d.event(ev, x - xo, y - yo, st)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 962, in event
    return handle_click(self.clicked)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 897, in handle_click
    rv = run(action)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\display\behavior.py", line 320, in run
    return action(*args, **kwargs)
  File "renpy/common/00action_file.rpy", line 452, in __call__
    renpy.load(fn)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\loadsave.py", line 770, in load
    log.unfreeze(roots, label="_after_load")
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1983, in unfreeze
    self.rollback(0, force=True, label=label, greedy=greedy, on_load=True)
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1815, in rollback
    self.load_failed()
  File "D:\xtra 7-Zip backup\old\A_Fathers_Sins-Chapter_IV-pc\renpy\python.py", line 1733, in load_failed
    raise Exception("Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?")
Exception: Couldn't find a place to stop rolling back. Perhaps the script changed in an incompatible way?

Windows-8-6.2.9200
Ren'Py 7.3.5.606
A Father's Sins Chapter_IV
Tue Apr 05 21:24:52 2022
Click to expand...
You'll need to pick a save made on the first two chapters – or start over. See this, for details.
 
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Q

qarnac

Newbie
Jul 4, 2019
60
27
Hordragg said:
You'll need to pick a save made on the first two chapters – or start over. See this, for details.
Click to expand...
Thanks. I remember seeing your post on this issue. I did find an older save from the end of chapter 1 that's working so I'll play it out from here and hope it works.
 
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BarbarrossaNA

BarbarrossaNA

Active Member
Sep 10, 2019
935
1,589
Was the update long? no. Were the animations epic? absolutely!

Gonna beat a dead horse for a minute.. I still think you need a 5 dollar tier.. From my understanding of how it works the percentage plus fees they take out of Patreon donations takes quite a bit of the 1 dollar tier. Another suggestion might be a doing away with the one dollar tier and putting a 3 or 5 dollar tier in it's place.. while grandfathering the 1 dollar people who have already pledged you. HAD to get that out of my system. NOW with that being said I'm hitting the 10 dollar Patreon after I post this.. just can't guarantee it for the long haul.. but at least as long as I don't get in trouble on the home front.

Back to this update... especially with the short time since the last one.. this one was beautiful.

signed.. Patreon 99
 
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Pixieblink

Pixieblink

Engaged Member
Game Developer
Jul 13, 2019
2,452
5,780
BarbarrossaNA said:
Was the update long? no. Were the animations epic? absolutely!

Gonna beat a dead horse for a minute.. I still think you need a 5 dollar tier.. From my understanding of how it works the percentage plus fees they take out of Patreon donations takes quite a bit of the 1 dollar tier. Another suggestion might be a doing away with the one dollar tier and putting a 3 or 5 dollar tier in it's place.. while grandfathering the 1 dollar people who have already pledged you. HAD to get that out of my system. NOW with that being said I'm hitting the 10 dollar Patreon after I post this.. just can't guarantee it for the long haul.. but at least as long as I don't get in trouble on the home front.

Back to this update... especially with the short time since the last one.. this one was beautiful.

signed.. Patreon 99
Click to expand...
Thank you. As a struggling dev having a hard time paying my bills every single patreon sponsor is GREATLY appreciated.

I understand your point about the $5 dollar tier, and actually think it may be a good idea financially to phase out the $1 and replace it with a $3 tier. But I have a hard time asking for $3 and not giving anything back in exchange.

Where as a buck... well that's kind of like a pat on the back and somebody buying you a really cheap cup of coffee at a gas station.
 
S

Smilingjack4

Newbie
Feb 26, 2019
77
285
Pixieblink said:
Absolutely. You would be amazed how little REAL feedback you get when creating a game.

So thanks, and feel free to drop me a comment and/or suggestion any time.
Click to expand...
As far as the writing goes, you can afford to be confident. Also, MC's internal monologue is the best way to process information, and every time you did it, it resulted in a memorable character building moment. You just need to find a balance you can comfortably keep in the back of your mind, so you don't have too much exposition or narration.

I realize this advice amounts to "Just keep breathing to not die", but I don't feel you need much advice.
 
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Pixieblink

Pixieblink

Engaged Member
Game Developer
Jul 13, 2019
2,452
5,780
cxx said:
usual from pixieblink, nice update, had funny moments (some), plot advanced (a bit) although not exactly anywhere and ABSOLUTELY NO SEX :)P).

scrshots:

girls are clearly not telling everything.

View attachment 1743627 View attachment 1743628 View attachment 1743629 View attachment 1743630 View attachment 1743631 View attachment 1743632 View attachment 1743633 View attachment 1743634 View attachment 1743635 View attachment 1743636 View attachment 1743637 View attachment 1743638 View attachment 1743639 View attachment 1743640 View attachment 1743641 View attachment 1743642 View attachment 1743643 View attachment 1743644 View attachment 1743645 View attachment 1743646 View attachment 1743647 View attachment 1743648 View attachment 1743649 View attachment 1743650 View attachment 1743651 View attachment 1743652 View attachment 1743653
Click to expand...
Fear not, there will be sex. Sooner or later. Probably sooner.
 
Mr. Wise

Mr. Wise

Newbie
May 6, 2018
16
45
Well done! a great game with great story that i really love to read and follow this kind of games, keep up good work. your main theme music remind me of Dead Can Dance music from a movie called mist. damn, that movie ending still hunts me....
 
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4.20 star(s) 56 Votes