VN Ren'Py A Man for All [Ep.14] [Venus Waltz]

[A.K.A87]

Here's my 2 cents.

Hmmmm the dialog is all over the place + it doesn't seem to have a real impact, no matter what you choose you will get the chosen point. The reaction is different but you still get the points. Thing that does bother me is there is no real choice at the times where it should count,,, little example: you go to a business meeting with Vanessa, she says: just listen, speak until spoken to. basically act the assistant part.
First thing you say when you introduce yourself is YO,,,, Really .
Second thing is the: Whoa Whoa Whoa to interrupt the conversation and then be surprised about the amount of money that is given with the modeling contract ?????... No choice in what you as the MC do.

As for the trouble people have with Vanessa,,, i get it ,, she is rude, insulting , abrasive and demeaning. Not someone you would want around if given the choice, but she has the means to an end for the MC so......

Last... As the MC we are getting a psychology education with biochemistry and are stated as a excellent student who is very intelligent.... if that is the case... then why does he behave like he grew up in a barn, doesn't read reactions or even body language. So.... overall there are some big holes in the story, missed opportunities that should matter and the MC's character profile is lacking.

Lets see if it gets beter.

 

[Rinbael]

There's a reason Vanessa is a bitch. There's a specific reason she decided to wear shades all the time. But it's personal and it would make no sense for her to tell you at this point in the story. If I explained how everything turns out with Vanessa, it'd be spoiling the entire game. I have all of these girls' backstories written and story paths planned out. If you're deciding now that you don't want any part in it and the reasons for the MC doing what he does, like I always say, no hard feelings if you decide to drop it.

For me personally Vanessa's entire character and personality just pisses me off and makes me despise her it's everything I hate in a person.

I understand that you can't just give us the option to tell her to fuck off since she is important to the story but I think giving the player more choices on how they interact or think about her would be good, similar to how you can tell the fashion agent that she has a bad attitude, it doesn't effect the story but it made me feel a bit better.

Right now whenever I have to interact with Vanessa I just pick the green choices since they seem to annoy her the most and do the complete opposite to what she tells you to just to piss her off and get through her scenes quickly. On the other hand I love Erika and really enjoy playing through her scenes and I think you have written her pretty well.

 

[ImperialD]

Hey, guys. Thanks for all of the feedback.

I want to address a few points to let you know what I'm thinking and where I'm going with the story. I know it's not perfect and if you don't like it for any reason, that's your choice. But I want you to know that there is some direction. Wall of text incoming.

In regards to what's happening in the story and all of the things the MC is doing, he has three reasons for going to extremes like working with Vanessa or fighting in a back alley. It's either some combination for his thesis to graduate, to raise money for Billy, or for the girl themselves. Now, if none of those reasons are good enough for you, I understand. But I can't just write out entire storylines when everything will eventually become intertwined. I'm just not capable of coding something that complex. I have to know my own limitations as an amateur. So, what the lack of choices comes down to are my own inexperience and also, my lack of hardware to render so many different choices.

The second, in regards to the girls themselves. They are not your friends. They're not supposed to be. You just met them. This is only the beginning of the story. Over the course of the game, relationships will develop as you learn more about them. That's what I think is lacking in some VNs these days. There's no actual dynamics with girls. Women fall in love with you at first sight and they have sex with you right then and there. And then that's it. There's no development. There's no growth. We know nothing about the girls themselves. How do you win a girl over when she's already won over? I'm not disparaging other games. I play them, too, and I enjoy them. I know these games are supposed to be unrealistic power fantasies (which AMFA also is). I wanted to do something different because I know I wouldn't be able to do other games as well as everybody else who's already doing them.

In AMFA, your relationship with these girls now is just professional. You get money or help with your thesis. The girls get something they want in return. In Erika's case, she explains this to you with rule number one. It's up to you to decide if there's anything more to it. Her offering herself to you on the first night you met will be brought up again as you learn more about her.

As for the MC doing all of these things and serving the girls... The MC is generally a good guy and willing to go along with everything as a means to an end. Like I said, he has three reasons for doing things, and if none of those reasons are good enough to play that part (either because they're too stupid and unbelievable or they don't fall in line with your personal preference) you can drop the game. No hard feelings. To me, fighting along with Erika to raise money for Billy doesn't make the MC a cuck. Bringing Vanessa a cup of coffee in exchange for a quarter of a million dollars doesn't make him a simp. But I can see how someone might not like it since they didn't have a choice in it. I know it'd be nice to have the option to refuse them outright but they're all pieces to a bigger puzzle and just one piece gone means the picture won't be complete. So, where's the choice in that? The choice comes in how you go about developing your relationship through the dialogue and accomplishing these tasks you're forced into. You don't get the ultimate option of ignoring them completely but you get an option of what to do once you're forced into a situation like how to fight your opponent or how to talk to Vanessa. I had to come to a realistic compromise because I can't render so many different permutations and plot states.

And for the girls themselves, your relationship with them will change over the course of the game. But there's more to them beneath the surface.

Take the MC, for example. He's working hard and trying to do well in school because of his parents. Do any of the girls know that your mother died? Is that something appropriate to bring up with any of them in any conversation you've had so far? Would they react differently if they knew what you were doing or where you came from?

Just like the MC, the other girls have a story. And that's where the dynamics come into play.

I know VNs are escapism male power fantasies and ideally you'd just have the option to tell Vanessa to fuck off. But in this game, you're just gonna have to learn to get along with her for now because I can't write her out of the story. I wish I could put in more reasons beyond finishing your thesis and money but I can't. Harry and Ron didn't like Hermione at the start of 'Harry Potter' and by the end of the story, they're best friends. I'm not saying you'll love Vanessa by the end of AMFA, but she won't be the same character at the end of the story that she is now.

There's a reason Vanessa is a bitch. There's a specific reason she decided to wear shades all the time. But it's personal and it would make no sense for her to tell you at this point in the story. If I explained how everything turns out with Vanessa, it'd be spoiling the entire game. I have all of these girls' backstories written and story paths planned out. If you're deciding now that you don't want any part in it and the reasons for the MC doing what he does, like I always say, no hard feelings if you decide to drop it.

I know there aren't enough VNs out there and I think the community is underserved. I'm just trying to make my own game and write a story that's different because I'm not good enough to do something more complex. There are times I think I made a mistake with AMFA and should scrap it. I mean, I wanted to make a game where the MC is a hero and a Samaritan trying to do what's right but he's coming off as a beta. I don't know. Maybe I'm an idiot. Maybe I didn't write it properly. Harem games are harem games for a reason. So, I'm well aware of all of the problems with the game. But as long as I've got at least one supporter, I'm doing everything I can to at least finish writing the story. I have to remember I can't please everybody.

Thanks for reading the wall of text to anybody who decided to read it. These are just things from my perspective. I'm not saying I'm right and everybody who disagrees with me is wrong. This is just my point of view and why I did things certain ways.

dammm .. now thats a book if i ever read one .... and i like your points .... my major thing was how the MC .. at least for me seemed like a sucker ... and that always bothers me .. well that and getting an MC that well simply put is such a wuss .... and yes i think it would be nice if i had the choice or 2 to tell the female i've just interacted with to just fuck off ,,, move on to the next babe that could help me out better ... i've yet to see that in any game ....
now i realize that its your game and all ... and it started pretty good to be honest ... just hated the idea of any females .. treating an MC like shit and using him to their ends i mean for god's sake i fight for one of them to make some cash and get what 1 bj from her and thats it ? ... one that does nothing but bitch 24/7 it seems .... one lab partner that i thought now dam shes hot as hell .. turns out well i was thinking at the time .. she'll end up a hooker and again i get shit ,,, typical NTR type games ( which i hate )..
at that with what i just read from you ... maybe i jumped the gun some .. and will try again in a few updates ...

 

[Blackowl97]

dammm .. now thats a book if i ever read one .... and i like your points .... my major thing was how the MC .. at least for me seemed like a sucker ... and that always bothers me .. well that and getting an MC that well simply put is such a wuss .... and yes i think it would be nice if i had the choice or 2 to tell the female i've just interacted with to just fuck off ,,, move on to the next babe that could help me out better ... i've yet to see that in any game ....
now i realize that its your game and all ... and it started pretty good to be honest ... just hated the idea of any females .. treating an MC like shit and using him to their ends i mean for god's sake i fight for one of them to make some cash and get what 1 bj from her and thats it ? ... one that does nothing but bitch 24/7 it seems .... one lab partner that i thought now dam shes hot as hell .. turns out well i was thinking at the time .. she'll end up a hooker and again i get shit ,,, typical NTR type games ( which i hate )..
at that with what i just read from you ... maybe i jumped the gun some .. and will try again in a few updates ...

Fuck, you just scared me with the two words you put in your comment. Hooker and ntr haha. Now I don't feel like even trying it haha.

 

[xxTHESTYGIANxx]

I am okay with going with the "is this working" system.....except for one glaring point. The MC knew Riley, had a crush on her and everything so at least where she is concerned, it should be a choice only concerning what he knows of her.

There are to many variables in this, we are thrown into a three tier system without knowing anything in advance, that is great to a point. At this point any WT Mod will just give us scenes and not the best choice because, lets face it, this system has no best choice. So it is easier to push LIs away then it is to get closer to them.

Personally I chose a mix of heavy knight with smooth for Riley, and the mirror of that for Erika....but does that actually lead to anything? Harlow is another unknown. It is just seemingly complex at this point in a VN where the player is trying to get to know the ones they don't already know while navigating the one they do from the prespective that they don't. Just my opinion of course but, at this point it is confusing in terms of what gets you closer and what doesnt or even how to mix the points to do so.

 

[d_pedestrian]

Really liked the latest update. I like how main girls haven't jumped on MC yet and still there's sexual content in every update without breaking the flow of story. I liked that it's not over with Marisa and there will be more content with her. Not interested in her as an LI but won't say no to more content.

One think i don't understand is why MC and Erica are equal partners when MC is the one doing the heavy lifting. Don't think erica deserves 50% of what they earn.

 

[fozquark]

You probably gave them more time than they deserved. You've given us a game with LI characters who have complex, intriguing personalities. I'd much rather play it than a wish fulfillment fantasy where the women are so easy you might as well be watching porn. A big part of the fun I'm having with this is trying to figure out what makes these women tick, and as we find out more about them it becomes a lot easier to feel the romance building. I'm just hoping that one of the ends can be a big poly harem with more than one baby bump because there's nothing sexier than a strong intelligent attractive woman carrying your child...

Ewwww.....absolutely not! Nothing unsexier!!! Please don't ruin the game!

 

[VenusWaltz]

Thanks for more of your feedback, everybody. I've read everything and am taking it all into consideration.

The dialogue system is mostly there so that you can define the MC during conversations. I've played a lot of VNs where I would or wouldn't say what the MC is saying, so I decided to give the player a choice. The scoreboard at the end of every episode is there just to see where you're leaning and how she'll ultimately perceive your personality. But it will mostly be superficial and won't affect anything negatively or positively. It's just a personal preference. It was never meant to be a right or wrong answer. And I can see how that can add some confusion when there are other decisions thrown in and the MC seems to go along with whatever is presented with him. For the dialogue colored choices, pick the choices you want based on how you want the LI to see you, remembering that it won't gate you from any content, only the LIs perception of your relationship and your personality when dealing with her. The red/gold personality choices are there to define your personality and how you may treat future situations (I'll add more info on this in the tutorial to make it clear). And finally, focus more on the non-conversational choices if you're more concerned with missing out on content (ex: turning down/accepting sex). I'm trying to be as clear as I can be about where choices are going and I haven't been doing that, so I'll try to make it clearer in the game itself.

The MC won't have situations sprung onto him, unless it's deliberately done to create a problem from an antagonist. Now that he's in these situations, he'll have a more proactive approach to dealing with them.

When things happen, I'll try to do a better job of explaining why they're happening and have the MC make decisions rather than someone else do it for him.

I can't make any promises or guarantees that everything will be perfect but I am aware of the problems and I'm trying to provide reasonable fixes within my own capabilities.

If you have any other problems, keep listing them. I'm around. I really appreciate all of your help.

One think i don't understand is why MC and Erica are equal partners when MC is the one doing the heavy lifting. Don't think erica deserves 50% of what they earn.

Remember it's Erika who put up her own money initially, so she's basically paying the MC. Erika will do work outside of the fighting so it will be more like a partnership. But you're right, the MC is doing the heavy lifting. The only thing I can do is have Erika do more to justify the equal partnership, which I plan on doing. That may or may not be enough for you. But I'm not just planning on having Erika leech off the MC the entire time, which I think is the biggest issue. Eventually, the MC will get what he deserves for his work, one way or another and I think it will be fair. It just may not seem like it now.

no creampie not interested..... hurm nice game but why no creampie ...

Only for special occasions.

 

[Content_Consumer]

*sings* Why you always lyin' ...

 

[godoff95]

I love this game, especially play it for Kate: the professor.

 

[The ArcKnight]

Extract and move inside the "A Man For All" folder not the game folder folder

I extracted your mod, moved the "Script" folder to the main AMFA folder, the one containing the ExE, but I am still not getting the (+1 Knight/Joker/Smooth) as shone in your screen shot.

Only for special occasions.

This makes me extremely sad as auto pullout kills sex scenes for me. At least give us an option for creampie! (for those we don't use a condom with)

 

[Tkoyama]

Billy reminds me David Draiman of Disturbed

View attachment 1083596

 

[Ripson]

I extracted your mod, moved the "Script" folder to the main AMFA folder, the one containing the ExE, but I am still not getting the (+1 Knight/Joker/Smooth) as shone in your screen shot.

You have to copy paste the entire game folder from the zip file.
You can watch the video linked below

You must be registered to see the links

 

[Paapi]

Why there is no love & lust points ??

 

[dgeorge]

Vanessa may be a bitch, but you're in it to help Billy. It's not like you follow her around like a simp with nothing to gain.

I normally play these games trying to be the knight, helping out Harlow and Erika. Like in real life, it has varying results.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”

Love the game, looking forward to the next update.

 

[VenusWaltz]

I love this game, especially play it for Kate: the professor.

Thanks. Kate's story will be slow because she is your professor but you will see a lot more of her as time goes on.

Why there is no love & lust points ??

A couple of reasons. Mainly I don't think I would be able to pull it off as well as other games have done. I feel like I'd be doing a cheap copy of other/better games that are already doing it. I know a lot of Renpy games are all the same anyway, but I thought I'd do something I can handle better. And I guess I wanted to be different, too.

Vanessa may be a bitch, but you're in it to help Billy. It's not like you follow her around like a simp with nothing to gain.

I normally play these games trying to be the knight, helping out Harlow and Erika. Like in real life, it has varying results.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.”

Love the game, looking forward to the next update.

Thanks. I plan on making all of the work you put in with the girls eventually pay off, even if you have no interest in them romantically. And if you do like them, you get something special, too.

 

[MLBnoob]

Thanks. Kate's story will be slow because she is your professor but you will see a lot more of her as time goes on.



A couple of reasons. Mainly I don't think I would be able to pull it off as well as other games have done. I feel like I'd be doing a cheap copy of other/better games that are already doing it. I know a lot of Renpy games are all the same anyway, but I thought I'd do something I can handle better. And I guess I wanted to be different, too.



Thanks. I plan on making all of the work you put in with the girls eventually pay off, even if you have no interest in them romantically. And if you do like them, you get something special, too.

I hope the eventually is not after 30 updates or more than a year of updates. Many people like storytelling BUT dislike blue-balling.

 

[godoff95]

Thanks. Kate's story will be slow because she is your professor but you will see a lot more of her as time goes on.

will check in a year then,

 

[Deleted member 3208170]

Hi VenusWaltz

Thanks for all your wall of texts. Really appreciate that.

I agree with almost everything you said.

And I want to say something to you as well.

1. I for myself will not demand or expect anything if I give you my feedback. If I post something it is always meant as suggestion.
You have a story to tell. It is your project. Do your thing.
That you are listening and react to feedback how you did is a good thing. It says a lot about you.

2. We don't have this many VNs here anymore. You are absolutely right. The most games right of now are plain picture stories. That's a huge turn off.

3. Games on F95 are male Power Fantasies. No that's not true anymore. Because the lag of choices means that you don't feel empowered anymore.
A lot of games even forces some kinks on you right out of nowhere (And the developer stated its just "light BDSM"). Be aware that this can become a problem. Just a hint of Maledom/Femdom can be a huge turnoff for folks.

4. Good to know that these points I choose don't block me from content. I was confused. The idea behind this interesting and I like that I can choose what I wanted to say.

These four points lead me to a suggestion.
I don't see it as a great problem right now that we have to go through all the girls. I think this VN goes in the direction of Romance and slow burn. Which is absolutely fine.
As we say in my country: "Without friction, no Warmth(Love)."

Erika is annoying. Vanessa is weird. So I see the problems in similar fashion like others around here.
Erika and Vanessa both needing you the same way as you need them. That should be enough that the MC can step up a little. Just saying yes in 3 different ways is not believable forever. Good at times but not forever.
I would recommend some "friction" asap. And some "Love" after that. Drama, Climax, Resolve. For both Erika and Vanessa.

I want to give an example with Vanessa.
The Moment in the Park could have been the perfect moment of friction. The Mc could have told her: "The Eyes are the Mirrors to your soul. You get more followers if you take off your shades."
Argument can roll out. Drama.
That's what I thought in that scene. Me:"Tell her she should take that damn thing off. Tell Her!"
Don't change the scene, but I hope you see where I'm coming from.

My greatest worry is that if you take too long with that, Erika and Vanessa getting burned with the audience and cant come back. That's something you maybe don't want.

Nether the less. Right now I liked your game. And would rate it 4 out of 5. But I wait with my rating a little longer.

Good luck.

 

[DyreMezza]

Its only 0.3 but its already a hell of a game.
5* from me