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yihman1

Knockout Master
May 11, 2017
3,109
10,943
T4bbo

In regards to your real life situation; Your story is a very sad and tragic one, and you have my deepest sympathies. There is no simple solution to your complex set of problems. The best advice I can give you is to take it one day at a time, and follow the path that makes you happiest. That being said you don't need to maintain all of your focus on either your game development, or on your wife. Do what feels right for your own mental health.

What I would do / feel if I were put in your situation as I understand it is the following:

(Which in no way is a suggestion for you to do the same, simply what I would do in your shoes.)

I would feel as if I am either divorced or a widower. The vows say "Until Death Do Us Part", and when someone puts a gun to their head and pulls the trigger with the intent to commit suicide that is as good as saying "We are divorced. Our relationship is over." in my book.

Perhaps some long term care facility for her, I would visit every so often, but as for me I would try my best to move on with my life. Perhaps take some time off of work to focus on my mental health / self improvement and eventually start dating again when it feels right.
 

fernandopoo

Member
May 22, 2017
159
133
Dear T4bbo, I am so sorry for you and for your wife. Even tough you will not seek advise nor comfort here (who are we, after all?) if I could provide it I would give it. Whatever you choose to do, do it wholeheartedly. Be clear with yourself: what you really want and need to do. Then act as there were not any other option, dont look back, dont feel remorse for your choice. Do whatever you can for your wife, but above all do whatever you want to do for your wife. That is the limit. If you love her and wants to be for her, do it and enjoy the chance to do so. It is going to be hard but rewarding. If you love her less, take care of her as you would do to any other human being, as much as you can without sacrifing yourself in the process, or not totally. And dont feel guilty for her actions. The ultimate choice of anybody is to keep on living or end it. And its HER decission.
The game is just a game, though is a creation and therefore something valuable. But at the end is just a game, much less important than life and love.
You are more free than you can think now. And I only hope that you live well, and also the best for your wife.
 

KekWGgWP

Active Member
Feb 9, 2018
771
1,250
T4bbo, the most important thing right now is to concentrate on your life, right now you are in a very tough situation that requiers 100% focus on it, leave the game aside until you get things settled and work on it again when you feel that you are ready, only you know when that will be, this is indeed a crisis of your life and i can't even imagine myself in your place, no one is gonna judge you because we all know how tough the life is and how hard can hit you when less you expect, what matters right now is to not give yourself up and keep your morale as high as possible, don't think about negative things and always thing about the good side of the events and what will be in the future, such incidents can really damage your mentality and way of thinking but don't let this things to break you, take care of yourself and i know that your life will get in order someday, stay strong and don't give up, much love and support.
 
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FuujSama

New Member
May 8, 2019
12
13
Problem is... she will not be 100% fine anymore, she's missing big chunk of her brain... if she can do 5% of what she was capable back then we will be lucky enough... it's already miracle that she survived, because that kind of bullet trajectory survives less than 1% of people who shot themselves in the head.

It's f*cking painful to admit, but I've already lost my wife... after traumatic brain injury like that she will be different person alltogether, probably with cognitive capabilities of 2 months old toddler. I'm not even sure I want her to reach higher cognitive capabilities for her to realise what has happened and what she has done. It would be hell on earth for her...

It's more about securing that for rest of her life she's not suffering... her diappers are changed, she is not hungry or thirsty etc... and if we're lucky, we can get some kind of non verbal communication with her.


ImmortalNight is right, I don't know what should I do... I'm facing toughest moral crossroad in my life. Brain tells me to work on game and spend less time with wife... heart tells me fuck the game, spend all your time in the upcoming year with wife and hope for the best. I'm more used to listening to my brain rather than heart...
Honestly, no one can blame you, whatever you choose. In these hard times, it will probably be emotionally hard to take care of your wife and she's unlikely to remember or have any reaction at all to your care. So all you can do is do whatever you feel will be better for yourself. Worst case scenario here is that your own mental state starts to go down the drain. Do what makes you happy. If that's working on the game, work on the game. If that's keeping your wife company, keep your wife company.

Whatever you do, do it because you want to do it and not out of some state of guilt or obligation. I mean, don't neglect your wife's necessary care, of course, but other than that, I think you shouldn't feel guilty if you don't go above and beyond. Just do whatever makes you saner. If she does recover some of her mental faculties, she'll need you to be strong and sane. Wrecking yourself out of obligation helps no one.
 

RJ24

Newbie
Jan 15, 2019
42
37
Problem is... she will not be 100% fine anymore, she's missing big chunk of her brain... if she can do 5% of what she was capable back then we will be lucky enough... it's already miracle that she survived, because that kind of bullet trajectory survives less than 1% of people who shot themselves in the head.

It's f*cking painful to admit, but I've already lost my wife... after traumatic brain injury like that she will be different person alltogether, probably with cognitive capabilities of 2 months old toddler. I'm not even sure I want her to reach higher cognitive capabilities for her to realise what has happened and what she has done. It would be hell on earth for her...

It's more about securing that for rest of her life she's not suffering... her diappers are changed, she is not hungry or thirsty etc... and if we're lucky, we can get some kind of non verbal communication with her.


ImmortalNight is right, I don't know what should I do... I'm facing toughest moral crossroad in my life. Brain tells me to work on game and spend less time with wife... heart tells me fuck the game, spend all your time in the upcoming year with wife and hope for the best. I'm more used to listening to my brain rather than heart...
With all the effort and time you have put into this game, it's better to take care of your wife. Games can be rebuilt from ashes and even created again and again. As for someone who you love, married and have spent a good chunk of your life together can't be created again. You won't find someone like her again, which is why spend more time with her.
I understand you may be stressed cause you have to go through all this, your loved one is in a pretty terrible spot as well but we all gotta cope with our problems and situations.
The day she gets better and you of all people feel that your in a good mood and feel great and ready to resume your activities we will welcome you back. Terribly sorry to hear about this, hope she gets better.
 
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Moricano

Well-Known Member
Jan 30, 2019
1,666
1,126
This game is great, but it is taking a long time to get an update.
This dislikes any player who tries to support the developer. :sneaky:
I went to Patreon's page and the last comments about this game were in June.
I think he gave up, nor is there an update.
 

Moricano

Well-Known Member
Jan 30, 2019
1,666
1,126
You can read it even on this page, just look up 2-3 posts before mine.
in short - devs wife had almost fatal car accident, she lives but sadly has brain injury.
No offense friend just made a comment, because I saw it in his Patron that the last messages posted there were in June.
Now that I heard about this from you.
Thank you for letting me know. (y)
 

Ayhsel

Chocolate Vampire
Donor
May 9, 2019
4,896
16,273
I've just read what happened. I am very sorry for you and your family. There is nothing I can say to make it better, I wished I could.

It's hard for me to think of a more painful position to be. Your life currently really sucks, but it goes on. For better or worse. So if you ever read this, please try to take care of yourself, physically, mentally and I don't know how, emotionally. And seriously hoping that pain, while I am confident it will never go fully away, becomes as numb as you can, as soon as possible.
 
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BigDaddyDom

Well-Known Member
Mar 4, 2020
1,406
1,729
Exciting news from T4bbo on Discord. Looks like he will drop a new release this month.
No just that he's been busy and it helps keep him sane.
Great news for us! I had a feeling this is how he would go, I think too many people assumed that he should stop working on the game when it seemed to me that working on it might actually benefit him. Excited for the update
 
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