MaxRichard
Active Member
- Oct 7, 2023
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FWIW from the dev's thoughtful response earlier, I understood (perhaps incorrectly) that the goal of the story is to show the MC becoming a more dominant person if they allow themselves to be one (by departing their comfort zone), so I think that's pretty cool — even if I personally tend to be more dominant from the outset (or I like to think so!).It does currently feel like the dialogue both in style and volume is weighted towards a pro-open relationship middle-to-low confidence path. But I understand and respect the dev's response, it can be difficult to write in a voice that perhaps comes secondary to the writer.
Not every story needs to be 100% generic. Character development is a worthwhile goal and seldom found in AVNs, so maybe we just weren't ready for it.
Having said that, if this character arc is indeed the goal, maybe a little bit more of foreshadowing in the earlier parts of the story would be helpful, to hint at the possibility of this development. And in which case, I would suggest more "show, don't tell" than thought bubbles by the MC (not saying the latter is prevalent in this particular story, but I do think too many AVNs are guilty of forgetting the golden rule)
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