VN Ren'Py Broken Promises [v0.34] [Light Cavalry]

3.60 star(s) 57 Votes

Skylaroo

Well-Known Member
May 28, 2017
1,726
4,552
Benoit gave Grace a fucking ammunition to destroy him.
Like a great lawyer she is(apparently), she could turn the table easily.
Yeah she was a slut, but she didnt hurt anyone, but for Benoit its another story.
This is a great example of why I somewhat question the writer. I understand the intention of the plot where someone blackmails someone else, but it doesn't make sense that it was done by a lawyer to another lawyer when clearly the illegal action is the blackmail and not being a slut. This case is when the person doing the blackmailing has far more to lose (getting fined and/or going to jail, and also potentially losing wife/children/money) than the person being blackmailed (losing reputation). It just doesn't make sense, especially since the blackmail is very avoidable and could be minimized so easily if Grace simply went to the police which would then prevent the spread of the photos/videos.

Blackmailing works if the person blackmailing is in a stronger position than the person being blackmailed. But it's backwards here because Grace is the one with far stronger position than Benoit.

An easy "fix" to this problem is to change the reveal of the photos/videos scene into Benoit showing them to Grace on his phone instead of sending text to her. That way Grace would have no evidence that would implicate Benoit. But even so, it would still be a pretty weak blackmail in general because Grace has power in the law firm.
 

Liam the Handyman

Active Member
Jan 24, 2021
538
1,620
This is a great example of why I somewhat question the writer. I understand the intention of the plot where someone blackmails someone else, but it doesn't make sense that it was done by a lawyer to another lawyer when clearly the illegal action is the blackmail and not being a slut. This case is when the person doing the blackmailing has far more to lose (getting fined and/or going to jail, and also potentially losing wife/children/money) than the person being blackmailed (losing reputation). It just doesn't make sense, especially since the blackmail is very avoidable and could be minimized so easily if Grace simply went to the police which would then prevent the spread of the photos/videos.

Blackmailing works if the person blackmailing is in a stronger position than the person being blackmailed. But it's backwards here because Grace is the one with far stronger position than Benoit.

An easy "fix" to this problem is to change the reveal of the photos/videos scene into Benoit showing them to Grace on his phone instead of sending text to her. That way Grace would have no evidence that would implicate Benoit. But even so, it would still be a pretty weak blackmail in general because Grace has power in the law firm.
Actually, if you look at it in context, Grace having more power in the law firm simply means she has more to lose. In reverse, bastardnoit has way less... and more motive to blacmail her from his pov since he 1)can dominate a superior and 2)he gets to bang a hot blonde...

Its actually quite logical imo.
 

Havenless_

Active Member
Oct 12, 2020
827
4,342
I doubt that everything that many (not all, I know, but I include myself) didn't like about Grace is anecdotal. But I also doubt that it is something persistent. Maybe it is the reason why the relationship between Grace and the MC "starts". And, as I said, I highly doubt Grace's entire plot is based on that. It would be a very poor decision, in my opinion. Because it wouldn't make sense. She has all the weapons to dismantle the blackmail very quickly.

-Would I personally prefer Grace's thoughts about fucking Benoit to be changed? Yes.
-Would I personally prefer to change Grace's past a bit and not make her a whore who fucked all her coworkers? Yes.

She could simply have had an affair with one of her teammates and he, without her consent, recorded her. And that would be that. She wouldn't look like a slut. lol
Based on what we've seen so far in the game, does blackmail work as a plot going forward? No. Definitely no.

The "but" I find is that maybe Grace is ashamed of her past and of having fucked Benoit and maybe that's the main reason she wouldn't act on it. But this is also meaningless when we are clearly shown Grace's thoughts saying how much she enjoyed being fucked wildly while Benoit's wife was on the other side. At the time she enjoyed it, yes. Sure. But to think that while they're trying to blackmail you is genuinely moronic.

That said, the conclusion I draw is that the writing, dialogue and parts of the plot seem really bad to me. But, seeing as how the "writer" of the game thinks he's writing a masterpiece and won't even accept constructive, objective criticism.... I understand why you bother with subjective criticism. They can be offensive and I include myself sometimes. But for you to not accept genuine and respectful comments insulting everyone is ridiculous.

I don't have much faith in this project. At least so far.
 

Liam the Handyman

Active Member
Jan 24, 2021
538
1,620
I doubt that everything that many (not all, I know, but I include myself) didn't like about Grace is anecdotal. But I also doubt that it is something persistent. Maybe it is the reason why the relationship between Grace and the MC "starts". And, as I said, I highly doubt Grace's entire plot is based on that. It would be a very poor decision, in my opinion. Because it wouldn't make sense. She has all the weapons to dismantle the blackmail very quickly.

-Would I personally prefer Grace's thoughts about fucking Benoit to be changed? Yes.
-Would I personally prefer to change Grace's past a bit and not make her a whore who fucked all her coworkers? Yes.

She could simply have had an affair with one of her teammates and he, without her consent, recorded her. And that would be that. She wouldn't look like a slut. lol
Based on what we've seen so far in the game, does blackmail work as a plot going forward? No. Definitely no.

The "but" I find is that maybe Grace is ashamed of her past and of having fucked Benoit and maybe that's the main reason she wouldn't act on it. But this is also meaningless when we are clearly shown Grace's thoughts saying how much she enjoyed being fucked wildly while Benoit's wife was on the other side. At the time she enjoyed it, yes. Sure. But to think that while they're trying to blackmail you is genuinely moronic.

That said, the conclusion I draw is that the writing, dialogue and parts of the plot seem really bad to me. But, seeing as how the "writer" of the game thinks he's writing a masterpiece and won't even accept constructive, objective criticism.... I understand why you bother with subjective criticism. They can be offensive and I include myself sometimes. But for you to not accept genuine and respectful comments insulting everyone is ridiculous.

I don't have much faith in this project. At least so far.
Game is 0.1. Imma sure the writer does take in feedback and will only improve as times goes by.

-Would I personally prefer Grace's thoughts about fucking Benoit to be changed? Yes, it would be good and best if she has more thoughts on how to cut off his tiny pp!

-Would I personally prefer to change Grace's past a bit and not make her a whore who fucked all her coworkers? No, this changes the premise of the backstory. Its changing the plot imo.
 
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portgasdluigi

Member
Jul 24, 2021
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-Would I personally prefer Grace's thoughts about fucking Benoit to be changed? Yes.
-Would I personally prefer to change Grace's past a bit and not make her a whore who fucked all her coworkers? Yes.

She could simply have had an affair with one of her teammates and he, without her consent, recorded her. And that would be that. She wouldn't look like a slut. lol
Based on what we've seen so far in the game, does blackmail work as a plot going forward? No. Definitely no.

The "but" I find is that maybe Grace is ashamed of her past and of having fucked Benoit and maybe that's the main reason she wouldn't act on it. But this is also meaningless when we are clearly shown Grace's thoughts saying how much she enjoyed being fucked wildly while Benoit's wife was on the other side. At the time she enjoyed it, yes. Sure. But to think that while they're trying to blackmail you is genuinely moronic.
Grace definitely thought longingly about how good Benoit's dick was. We had to experience all her disturbing thoughts. She was thinking about how he fucked her and she was getting aroused by it. She definitely didn't seem ashamed of it then. She really only cared when he threatened her with blackmail (also a tag that should be applied to the game). Not only does this kind of story not belong in the type of game the devs were selling people on (I WAS a patron) it's an illogical mess of writing.
 
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portgasdluigi

Member
Jul 24, 2021
298
735
Game is 0.1. Imma sure the writer does take in feedback and will only improve as times goes by.

-Would I personally prefer Grace's thoughts about fucking Benoit to be changed? Yes, it would be good and best if she has more thoughts on how to cut off his tiny pp!

-Would I personally prefer to change Grace's past a bit and not make her a whore who fucked all her coworkers? No, this changes the premise of the backstory. Its changing the plot changing imo.
When you've seen what I've seen from the writer and talked to the people I've talked to who were close to the devs and warned him about this before the release, you'll know that he does not accept feedback. He was told that the Grace story was a terrible idea but he wanted to piss people off. He knew it would piss people off. I'd love to change the premise of her backstory, it's a terrible backstory.
 

Liam the Handyman

Active Member
Jan 24, 2021
538
1,620
Grace definitely thought longingly about how good Benoit's dick was. We had to experience all her disturbing thoughts. He was thinking about how he fucked her and she was getting aroused by it. She definitely didn't seem ashamed of it then. She really only cared when he threatened her with blackmail (also a tag that should be applied to the game). Not only does this kind of story not belong in the type of game the devs were selling people on (I WAS a patron) it's an illogical mess of writing.
Its more of a presentation issue imo, not so much of the writting.

When you've seen what I've seen from the writer and talked to the people I've talked to who were close to the devs and warned him about this before the release, you'll know that he does not accept feedback. He was told that the Grace story was a terrible idea but he wanted to piss people off. He knew it would piss people off. I'd love to change the premise of her backstory, it's a terrible backstory.
I think what he meant is more towards not changing the story. However i am sure he does take feedback with regard to prose.
 

Spfjolietjake

Conversation Conqueror
Sep 26, 2019
7,511
14,647
I don't think the grace scene caters to the ntr lovers and I know it doesn't cater to the ntr haters. It doesn't cater to the romance lovers or the bdsm crowd. Who the hell is this "quirk" for? Virgin lovers will hate it and it doesn't do anything for slut lovers like me.
Truly the only people that I think would get actually enjoyment out of it is players that like their lovers to talk about old boyfriends and how good they are. Is there a big niche for this?

It always reminds me of clerks:
Dante: my girlfriend sucked 37 dicks
Customer: in a row?

I think there are better quirks to give an li than getting off on past fucks but that's just my opinion...
 
Mar 9, 2021
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429
So if Benoit works at the same office Kylie, mom & grace all work, how the hell does he think he can blackmail her with revenge porn? Kylie or her mom will have him fired if she tells them, also grace could threaten to show Benoits wife the videos & she could divorce him too
You mean "how the hell does writers of the story think that..."
but it doesn't make sense that it was done by a lawyer to another lawyer when clearly the illegal action is the blackmail and not being a slut. This case is when the person doing the blackmailing has far more to lose (getting fined and/or going to jail, and also potentially losing wife/children/money) than the person being blackmailed (losing reputation).
My conclusion from whole blackmail scenario is that he's betting everything on Grace that she might be more concerned about her face/reputation and hence might back down after blackmailing her. But hell she's portrayed exactly opposite of that, she might even enjoy based on those monologues.
 

portgasdluigi

Member
Jul 24, 2021
298
735
So if Benoit works at the same office Kylie, mom & grace all work, how the hell does he think he can blackmail her with revenge porn? Kylie or her mom will have him fired if she tells them, also grace could threaten to show Benoits wife the videos & she could divorce him too
Yeah the story is really nonsensical... all the Grace stuff ruins her as a love interest, Having Grace fondly remember getting pounded by Benoit doesn't make me like her at all. They act like they have no idea how laws work when they work at a law firm. If this storyline was going to proceed in a logical way, then Grace would either go to the police or go right to Kylie and Benoit would be finished, Blackmail, Sexual Harassment in and out of the workplace, potential revenge porn. It doesn't make any sense. If that doesn't happen I can only assume Grace an idiot.
 

Osamabeenfappin

Well-Known Member
Nov 24, 2019
1,985
4,593
I don't think the grace scene caters to the ntr lovers and I know it doesn't cater to the ntr haters. It doesn't cater to the romance lovers or the bdsm crowd. Who the hell is this "quirk" for? Virgin lovers will hate it and it doesn't do anything for slut lovers like me.
Truly the only people that I think would get actually enjoyment out of it is players that like their lovers to talk about old boyfriends and how good they are. Is there a big niche for this?

It always reminds me of clerks:
Dante: my girlfriend sucked 37 dicks
Customer: in a row?

I think there are better quirks to give an li than getting off on past fucks but that's just my opinion...

Jokes on Benoit(balls!)Grace has her own BETTER video of them having sex. Her kink is blackmailing herself.
 

Skylaroo

Well-Known Member
May 28, 2017
1,726
4,552
Actually, if you look at it in context, Grace having more power in the law firm simply means she has more to lose. In reverse, bastardnoit has way less... and more motive to blacmail her from his pov since he 1)can dominate a superior and 2)he gets to bang a hot blonde...

Its actually quite logical imo.
Hard disagree. Being sexually active and being recorded involuntarily makes her a victim, and she'd be a survivor once the issue is solved. A law firm wouldn't have any legal reasoning whatsoever to fire their own lawyer for being a victim in a criminal case.
 
3.60 star(s) 57 Votes