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VReal

Newbie
Game Developer
Aug 9, 2022
43
253
I really like this game, am supporting. Jessica is very well written. full of life and very expressive, I immediately had a crush on her. But I don't know why the side story exists unless Dev is planning to merge the stories. It's an entirely different story. If there's no crossover you're just bloating the game. But some thoughts:
1. The English is atrocious. I point it out because someone else pointed it out and you were a dick about it. If you got some money coming in, pay an English speaker to look over your Google translated script.
2. I like the side story, just doesn't fit with the main story. Still confused why Dev did this.
3. Episode 12 is awful. Side story the kid in bed while friend fucks gf. The lighting is beyond shit. No clue who these people are or what they're doing until later when we can see shit.
Apparently, you don't read the text very carefully, even though there is not much of it. And you also haven't read the FAQ (here, on Patreon and in the next versions of the novella), in which I answer repeated questions. However, I will briefly respond to your comments:

1. Yes. Sorry. There is no money for a translator yet.
2. The heroes of the two stories will intersect more and more as time goes on.
3. Hmm. There were already scenes in the dorm, and the transition to the scene of the second story is always accompanied by the "Meanwhile" cover. Well, the darkness is just night.))
Sorry if I disappointed you.

Anyway, thanks for the support and feedback.
 

Daniele69

Engaged Member
Feb 22, 2020
2,044
18,621
This is the Italian translation of:
D.J. Story [v0.30]

**********************************************************************************
This translation is "unofficial" and "made by a fan"
extract the .rar file and move "game" to the game where the .exe file resides overwrite if required.

Download
 

M.Alice

Lunar Princess
Donor
Compressor
Aug 18, 2024
1,062
9,459
D.J. Story [v0.30] [VReal] [Compressed] [280MBl]

PC: / /

Mac: / /

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Vash1980

New Member
Feb 4, 2023
12
27
have i misunderstood something ? anyway i found the script a bit confusing. i mean if he is her brother (or another time it's her cousin) how can he suddenly be the nephew of her mom?
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:sneaky:
 

youraccount69

Engaged Member
Donor
Dec 30, 2020
3,352
1,351
DJStory-0.30
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Filipis

Active Member
Nov 15, 2022
935
1,800
VReal , here's some constructive feedback for why the game isn't doing so well:
  • The "Engrish": The english translation you use is... terrible. I know you don't have money to hire a translator, but you need to start searching for someone or anyone - with better language skills - to help you fix the dialogue in this game. This is the foundation of every AVN - graphics should be secondary.
  • The Graphics: Not a big deal, obviously, not the best - but they don't have to be. Maybe try "fixing" up the main girl (from some angles, her chin and cheekbones are just unnatural, but for the most part - they are more than serviceable.
  • With the exception of 2 total scenes where the 2nd MMC (the young man) and the FMC can be seen together or "interacting", there is a total disconnect between these two parallel stories: what you should've done, is have the secondary MMC become infatuated with the FMC following their encounter in the store, after which he vows to seduce the FMC as his first girlfriend and break his virgin curse. Would give a reason why we should care about him.
Honestly, fixing the dialogue should be your top priority. The rest will come.
 
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