Going by what you have described for the scene, it does not read that way, it looks to me that she is going to offer her services to the officers to get herself arrested. I would have put them talking on the sidewalk.
But, going by what is provided, the issues are mostly to do with posing. The lady in red is not really looking at the officers and she has a blank expression, also her hair is clipping into her breasts. I would alter her expression by putting a little relaxation in her eyes and using vismes or whatever it is called to change her mouth so it looks like she is actually speaking.
The officers look like they don't even know the lady is talking to them, or the render was taken as they were just driving along. If I was doing the render like this specifically I would at least turn their heads slightly so it looks like they are in conversation with the lady, but ultimately I would have set the render with them talking out of the car and on the sidewalk.