VN Ren'Py Abandoned Excluded [Ep. 2] [RevisedStrategy]

[desmosome]

Spoiler: Hmm

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

He wasn't getting in in the first place. There was one spot and they gave it to family. It's shitty that they didn't include him in the discussion, but in all honesty, of course Olivia would be favored for that spot based on the relationships of these characters.

If we believe whatever they are telling us, the sin is being too pussy or guilty to actually tell him what's up. Not really a betrayal. But they could just as well be lying and the whole thing was iffy in the first place. There could be shady business.

 

[Rinbael]

I thought this would be another generic college game but you are at least doing something different with the plot. I just hope there is another LI that isn't one of the three friends but going by the banner, I don't think that will be the case apart from Celeste.

I agree that they didn't betray the MC but they kept the info from him because they were too cowardly to just tell him up front what is happening. They game does seem pretty realistic in the way they show how unfair Nepotism actually is.

I just hope there will be some choice in regards to how the MC treats them for keeping things from him. I'm not expecting you to be able to tell them to fuck off and ignore them the whole game but I hope he doesn't just instantly forgive them and forget what they did.

 

[`Ray`]

Damn! Renders look good!

Will try this later today!

 

[Krull]

Fan Sig:

link:

https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/05/1831484_exc-fan.gif
https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/08/1993611_exc-fan2.gif
https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/08/1993610_exc-fan3.gif
https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/08/1993609_exc-fan3a.gif
https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/08/1993608_exc-fan4.gif
https://attachments.f95zone.to/2022/08/1993607_exc-fan5.gif

 

[Prokopije]

Hello. Monogamy route possible or will be mandatory fuckfest no matter what?

 

[Allan Wolf]

another university-themed game... and then they say that incest games are more of the same lol

 

[Old Man Al]

He wasn't getting in in the first place. There was one spot and they gave it to family. It's shitty that they didn't include him in the discussion, but in all honesty, of course Olivia would be favored for that spot based on the relationships of these characters.

If we believe whatever they are telling us, the sin is being too pussy or guilty to actually tell him what's up. Not really a betrayal. But they could just as well be lying and the whole thing was iffy in the first place. There could be shady business.

That's right. I would have been okay with it if they told me beforehand. I would probadly even have offered her to go and make place. But the way it was handled it is just "Fuck you. Get out of my life." for me.

 

[Dajose]

another university-themed game... and then they say that incest games are more of the same lol

for you the new game will play in a retirement home. Then all aspects of games have been explored and you can die a happy old man with a walker.

 

[SixtyNineGaming]

I love drama and this VN looks like it'll have tons of it. This is still an initial release, so we don't get much more than introduction and premise, but that itself is filled with so much melodrama. Nothing is clearly defined, so there's also a lot of intrigue.

Looking forward to further releases.

 

[EZ8lt]

Allright so the english def needs some improvement, like "I don't know why she elected not to tell you", you mean chose. Small stuff like that. Also the circumstances needs some serious clearing up and explanation. Why the MC can't stay where he is now currently? He talked about having no prospects right now but we don't know why. What city life he's gonna embrace leaving his home, in another city or what? And if Olivia and Melissa are sisters, why wouldn't she handle their applications, not only for Melissa? Stuff like that needs to be clarified for story cohesion.

 

[TiffanyMonroe]

this game besides not having incest tag apparently has no milf ... good luck

Will we be able to make milfs?

Holy shit, first Episode and all of MC's friends are bitches. Ellie might be the only ray of light here.

Having said that, looking forward for Episode 2 to see if anyone is redeemable lol

At first I thought you were gonna says whores so now I'm glad they're just bitches instead.

 

[MisterNephilim]

He wasn't getting in in the first place. There was one spot and they gave it to family. It's shitty that they didn't include him in the discussion, but in all honesty, of course Olivia would be favored for that spot based on the relationships of these characters.

If we believe whatever they are telling us, the sin is being too pussy or guilty to actually tell him what's up. Not really a betrayal. But they could just as well be lying and the whole thing was iffy in the first place. There could be shady business.

Thats why I specified that it's a betrayal of trust.

Not to mention that: she dragged you into a party, to find the one person to inform (not the MC because fuck you I guess) and then abandon you to your fate without explaining anything, and to basically attend to an intoxicated friend also that they also leave vulnerable in the party, a college party mind you, where you also don't know anyone there.

After that I would not trust anything that bitch has to say lmao

 

[Deleted member 4850722]

Alright, lets get this out of the way

Are you planning on this being a route locking/choose one girl type of game? Or a harem/romance everyone without consequence type of game?

I'll be doing my best to avoid having decisions made in early episodes lock you out of options later in the game. I hate when VN's do that. I would *like* to be able to allow you to interact with different love interests on a per episode basis, but this is quite limiting when it comes to having consequences/information feeding over from previous episodes. I'll play around with it and see how it feels, if it ends up limiting creativity I'll avoid doing it. I'll also avoid doing it if it would create plot holes by hopping around different routes each episode.

No animated scenes?

Animation in DAZ is really tricky, there are plenty of pre made animations available but this is stuff most of you have already seen in a different game at this point. Custom animating in DAZ sucks because it's not made for animation, it interpolates keyframes really poorly and always looks very stiff (not to mention it's just hard to work in) I plan on doing low framerate image "animations" for now. But in the future when I figure out a viable workflow I'll custom animate scenes in Maya/Blender. This is very time intensive though so it might be a bit further down the road.

Stop removing the text box. Thanks.

View attachment 1808344 View attachment 1808356

Well, it's the combination of shitty font + super transparent text box I guess. This shit annoys me so much.

edit: I just figured out a solution to this once and for all. Press 'a' and then turn on high contrast text. You could also adjust text size. It will look a bit clunky, but that is a small price to pay for actually being able to read things.

I'll probably design a better text box. Will also look at swapping it out for something higher contrast in scenes like this with harsh lighting.

Allright so the english def needs some improvement, like "I don't know why she elected not to tell you", you mean choose. Small stuff like that. Also the circumstances needs some serious clearing up and explanation. Why the MC can't stay where he is now currently? He talked about having no prospects right now but we don't know why. What city life he's gonna embrace leaving his home, in another city or what? And if Olivia and Melissa are sisters, why wouldn't she handle their applications, not only for Melissa? Stuff like that needs to be clarified for story cohesion.

I intentionally left some details vague as I'm developing this episode per episode, I didn't want to over-clarify certain things in episode 1 that would stop me unfolding the plot steadily in future episodes. This is good feedback though and I'll edit the script before episode 2 to clarify some things.

For clarity - Melissa is older and has been attending Greendale (the college/university) for a couple of years. She wasn't really involved in MC/Olivia's application process until now. When I say "the city" I just mean the city that Greendale is in. I left it unnamed because I couldn't find a good way to fit it into dialogue without it sounding clunky. I'll reconsider that.


Thanks a bunch for the feedback, I really wasn't expecting a response like this from everyone. I'm excited to keep working on this.

 

[drcynic22]

Allright so the english def needs some improvement, like "I don't know why she elected not to tell you", you mean choose.

It would be “chose” not “choose” in this instance, though. While using “elected” is perfectly correct from a grammatical point of view, it’s not very accurate from a conversant point of view. Most people wouldn’t say it, even if it is accurate. Most would say “chose”.

 

[19Castiel23]

The renders are amazing

 

[Avidius7]

another university-themed game... and then they say that incest games are more of the same lol

It's comedic that you suggest there are as many college games as there are incest ones.

What is truly overused is the whole "Father died/disappeared" plot.

 

[Deleted member 4850722]

One last reply I forgot to add to the above post ^

I like the writing style. We learn as we go. The commonly used character bios at the start of VNs is often a sign of amateur writers, so I'm always glad to see games that proceed without such crutches. It also avoids unnatural Q&A sessions with girls to introduce them to the players. The basic set up for the story was pretty interesting. I'm curious to see how some relationships will pan out. If we take everything at face value, the girls didn't do anything too fucked up other than keeping MC in the dark about it for some unfathomable reason. It doesn't quite make sense, so there is possibility of something more sinister going on, maybe having something to do with their mom?

Anyways, the visuals were great. Nice models, but I feel like their jawline looks a bit weird from certain angles. Awesome clothing. Nice body proportions. Great expressions. None of that psycho smile or extreme expressions we see from many devs that go wild on those sliders.

I'm glad you noticed this - I tried my best to keep the facial expressions subtle but not too subtle, as I want body language to be a big part of the story telling. Some devs forget that they're writing a visual novel and forget that they can use visual cues, some go way overboard and make crazy expressive faces that look very unrealistic. Now that the episode is complete and I've looked at the same renders over and over again, there are a few that I feel have slightly too much expression and a few that aren't lit entirely up to standard. I'm already re-rendering these to get them up to scratch.

 

[WastedTalent]

kind of short even for an introduction or prologue. The only thing that stood out was for a college game it is a bit different on the base premise, the models are ok but I agree with several others here the personalities are equal to some 12-13 year old kids. I know patreon they have to be 18, but there is a level of immaturity here that is unexplained to this point, unless MC is a complete narcissist or something which hasn't been revealed yet. I just don't get the whole sabotage thing. I'm sure there is some kind of reason that we will find out a long time from now, but just kind of meh so far. For now it's possibly worth a second look once the next release comes, but not sure if the dev can make it actually interesting.

 

[Allan Wolf]

It's comedic that you suggest there are as many college games as there are incest ones.

What is truly overused is the whole "Father died/disappeared" plot.

I've been playing porn games for about 3 years and I can say that it's all the same, college, mc who starts life in another city, mc starting to open a business... as for incest games I also agree that it's the same boring as always amnesia, dead father etc.

 

[Allan Wolf]

just this week, about 10 games with a university plot and only 3 with some incest were released here on Brazilian sites.