VAM shits on these porn "games". It does NOT look outdated at all, unless you use the worst textures and have a potato rig... and any moron can make a decent animation.
Sorry to break it to you but even on a RTX 4090 at 200% resolution scaling and max settings VAM looks dated. The biggest issues are the hair, lighting, and skin shaders. I'm not saying it looks bad, but it absolutely looks dated.
Hell, this game, Operation Lovecraft, has better lighting and skin material shaders than VAM if you ignore the stylized faces and the bad hair (excluding Elizabeth, something all characters are getting "supposedly"). If Wild Life didn't have such a shitty art style for its characters it would likely be better, too, and it is an open world game. For the time being it sits roughly par, regardless.
This is not even considering the game's performance issues due to ultra-shitty non-existent CPU optimization or the fact its intended for extremely small scenes with heinous load times due to the most moronic file system in history of programming, ever, and it is intended for (realistically) max 3 characters even with a RTX 4090 (yes, you can have more with caveats). For the average CPU and GPU most people have its quality plummets, hard, due to poor scaling making it fall lower compared to the others that have better scaling currently and VAM is confirmed to never be improved here because it was essentially abandoned for VAM2 which has no release date atm.
Why don't you go make some great animations and make bank then. Considering the majority suck but also have fucking dreadful lighting whihc makes the visuals look even worse unless you setup a custom lighting rig in every single scene (okay, not every... just 85-90% of them).
As for all three of these games if we compare them to modern graphically impressive games they all look quite dated and that was the other part of my meaning. Currently, there are no proper high quality visually impressive NSFW game offerings available.
It doesn't help that, as someone else mentioned, it takes a PhD to use. Kidding, that is a gross exaggeration but the UI is kind of a joke and Mesh, the creator, is overly reliant on other people implementing basic stuff he should have and has acknowledged they plan to cut the same corners with VAM2 all over again.
Really, the only thing going for it is the flexibility of what you can do if, big if, you are willing to put the effort in, the money in, and can accept its limitations. Most people aren't willing to create their own in depth scenes and animations, however, which is another point to consider plus most people aren't artists, don't have mocap equipment, etc. Yes, I'm aware there is basic stuff you can modify on your own like you showed in your example post and that is a limited extent. Fortunately, if you pay a bit extra some stuff like VamX make it a bit more user friendly (when it works properly) but even that still has great limitations.
Your take is simply not accurate and for the average person who is being recommended VAM not realistically representative of what they can expect. Even in the best case your claims about the graphics are patently false. It is merely decent at best.