I don't disagree with much of what you've said. There's a reason I fell in love with her in the first place. For the life of me I cannot recall what that reason was. I think a lot of people go into relationships and/or marriages highlighting a few areas of common interest while handwaving away things that are potentially fundamental incompatibilities--the type of things that can fester and destroy a marriage over time.Yo, I might not have had that much romantic relationships in my life (I'd say 1.5, because the 0.5 was more like dating a crush that didn't work out in a short, but serious relationship), but what I realised is that nowadays people don't really know what they want out of themselves, let alone a serious relationship with marriage. I don't know the details of your relationship and I do not think it should be any of our business to be informed - it's your personal life and you owe us none of that stuff. If she decided to leave for "the grass is greener on the side" then she's an absolute lowlife not worth any of your time, because why the fuck one would waste their time pretending to call someone special, but acting absolutely oppositely. I'm aware feelings for someone slowly vanish overtime, but one must also carry a brain on their shoulders and actually think for a second why they chose to be with that person, evaluate their personality, their beliefs, instead of "yeah, I'm stringing myself along you, because of the vibes". Yeah, how about fuck that "feeling vibes" attidude. Relationships are built upon strong family belief than "live in the moment" type of lifestyle. But regardless, you should take a break from the game development, IF NEEDED, but don't burn out yourself even more by using this as a deep distraction, it might hurt you even more down the line. I felt that way when I had a depression during my college years studying video game development then quitting college in pursuit of culinary school then burning out again due to toxic mental environment and heart condition. Break ups are a harsh thing emotionally and physically. Been there, experienced that. But what saves us from insanity is the fact that we do not need someone else, if we love ourselves sufficiently. So love yourself! I believe you're a tough and kind person and good luck to you! You'll get through this! We all do...
And apologies for the semi-rant, I'm just exhausted of narcissistic people viewing relationships as a "short term resources alliance" than something that might not occur again in their lifetime.
I am of the belief that you are responsible for your own happiness and that if you are expecting your happiness to be provided by someone else, then you are not in optimal shape to be in the dating pool and destined to be unhappy forever. I also believe that you should enter marriage with a bit of selflessness--that a marriage is something you and your partner share a goal and strive towards. It doesn't work if one party views the marriage as a SERVICE that is provided TO them.
Ironically, since the papers were signed and submitted, the (ex-)wife and I have been much more friendly and candid with each other. We agree that we should have never gotten married in the first place and that we make better friends than spouses. I'm helping her pack and I'll help her move into her new place. I was once a professional mover and It's the last time I'll get to metaphorically "flex" while she's around.
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