I'm playing so I might as well spot typos as I go, and you guys can throw it in when you get to it.
Also, I fucking die every time he calls Katara hair loops lmaooo
(prologue literally the line right before falling in the hole)
Hor'nii: Well then, good sir, it is incumbentencumbered upon me...
Katara: I swear, what was the point of bringing me to the beach....
Hor'nii also feels something too and is suddenly aware that they interacted in some way....
Hor'nii: You can see me too? oh thank the heavens, I'm not doomed to solitary exile for all eternity after-all. [after-all shouldn't be hyphenated, "after all" is a phrase but no hyphen. Also if I may, seems like an excited statement, could do with an ! while I'm here ]
Katara: ...I've got better things to do than to indulgeyou and Sokka Sokka and your sick idea of a joke.
Aang: I'm beginning to think that the other spirits kicked you out for more than....
Warrior 1: Yeah,definately definitely!
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Review so far: that scene was great. Definitely could use just a few more small additional touches (like facial expressions for Aang), but I'm sure you already knew this part and were planning on it. So far looks pretty promising!
Also, I fucking die every time he calls Katara hair loops lmaooo
(prologue literally the line right before falling in the hole)
Hor'nii: Well then, good sir, it is incumbent
Katara: I swear, what was the point of bringing me to the beach....
Hor'nii also feels something too and is suddenly aware that they interacted in some way....
Hor'nii: You can see me too? oh thank the heavens, I'm not doomed to solitary exile for all eternity after-all. [after-all shouldn't be hyphenated, "after all" is a phrase but no hyphen. Also if I may, seems like an excited statement, could do with an ! while I'm here ]
Katara: ...I've got better things to do than to indulge
Aang: I'm beginning to think that the other spirits kicked you out for more than....
Warrior 1: Yeah,
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Review so far: that scene was great. Definitely could use just a few more small additional touches (like facial expressions for Aang), but I'm sure you already knew this part and were planning on it. So far looks pretty promising!