Hah! I definitely felt myself falling into that trap. In chapters two and three, I was kind of using narration as a reminder for what the renders should look like. As a result, I was basically adding descriptive text constantly. Now I stopped being a dummy, and I do it like this:
Descriptive narration is excelent in none illustrated books and games and for the blind infact its essencial to them.
However a well illustrated VN or game can be fe-kin annoyimg done wrong and a lot of Dev's especially new Dev's do it.
But unfortunatly not all of them learn from the mistake and some don't even get it right when being over descriptive.
An example of this is a game I wont name where the Dev writes some thing like
" The MC lays back in his bath and thinks of the day ahead"
While the Render they use has the MC taking a Shower? explain that one to me
.
Another example of too much narration.
The first render shows MC walking out the house saying "I'm off to Aunties house now Mom see you later" thats fne makes sense.
Now the bad part we then get a animated render of the MC in a car with the background moveing past and the narration says.
"The MC jumps in his car and drives to his Aunties"
Why tell us what we already know he said he was gonna drive to his aunties in the render before.
And now he's sat behind the wheel in a moveing car.
What else could he be doing and where else is he likely to going for fe-ks sake.
A better example might be same animated render of the MC in the car with the background moveing past but the narration.
"I wonder if I should of phoned Auntie to let her know i'm comeing over".
At least thats something interesting and makes more sense than just describing what we can already see.
So anyway thats my two unsolicited Penneth's worth on Narration
So If I had any advice to any dev's or anyone else wanting to narrate anything thats not for the blind.
It would be "Stop describing the fe-kin obvious"
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