Ok, several of you have really helped me out, and I appreciate that - thank you so much all of you. However, while I've made progress I still have something I'm doing wrong. My save from Part 1 IS good I've discovered and I was able to load it successfully, so it appears I previously merged the two parts. However, if I load that save from Part 1, all of the relationships are now back to "non incest". But if I put the two patches over top of my Part 2 install, the game goes back to the very beginning again (on the airplane going to see Grandma). How do I fix that? Your walkthrough kind of referred to it, but not clearly.
Again, thank you so much for your help.