Well, to be fair, gay sex IS disgusting. There doesn't need to be any justification to declare something disgusting, its not some rational conclusion you come to, its a built in instinct that causes you to feel disgust upon witnessing feces or gay sex (traps arent gay btw).
First, I agree that I, personally, find male on male gay sex disgusting, but, as a straight man, female on female is hot as heck. It's more about calling it out to people that might not find it disgusting. There are plenty of people that would get very upset with you for saying something like that. Personally, I think they're too sensitive and need to learn to accept others' opinions, but it's still rather rude to be so blunt about it.
Second, Traps are 100% gay. The whole point is to make a male(or female) attractive to the straight people of the same gender. If a male trying to appear attractive to a male (or female to a female) isn't gay, I don't know what is.
As for your "unwilling" vore issues? Almost all things that lead to digestion are unwilling. Yes, most of the time you have to actively try to get eaten, and you can ask for it, but usually you don't ask unless you believe they like you enough to let you out. For things you have no real control of:
Go swimming at the beach while the shark is around and she might suddenly gulp you down in the middle of it, and if you haven't become really good friends with her, and don't have ipecac or the stats to escape, you're dead.
Elaine will eat you if you don't have a job after a week or so, or if you don't buy groceries, but keep eating food.
The hippo has situations where, when you're feeding her, there's a chance to accidentally get eaten, and there's apparently a chance to be eaten while sleeping in the bed at her house, though I'm not 100% sure on what triggers that.
Those are the only ones I know of that you don't have to actually try to get eaten by them for, so it's not a lot, but they exist. As I've said before, I'm not much of a prey fan when it comes to vore, so I'm not super into this game, but it's a neat pass-time, since I like the management aspects and I like a couple of the models. It needs work and more content, sure, but that's ok. Nothing is perfect, so I always go into something hoping to like it, but expecting to be let down.