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Lotrum

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Game Developer
Nov 11, 2023
169
431
Choose "Approach her and talk" and if you pass your skill test you will gain 2 percent. It's really 20% increase not 120% so you have to do it 10x.
I should probably rephrase it to make it less confusing, yes, it's 20% and supposed to be 20%, that becomes a 120% effectiveness, but it might be a bit confusing to say 120%
 
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Juicejames

Newbie
Nov 24, 2019
30
29
Very very promising game. In the future updates, Maybe leveling system (for example cha 1, cha 2) could be implement with the more experinced or annoying characters . That could boost the game experience of second or third rounds .

In the round one, You collect your points and use most of them to fuck girls who can break with level 1 but you can barely talk with the girls/teachers that level 2 is neccesary to fuck. Before second round you use your points to invest level 2 character or invest level 1 girls to collect their achievement all easily. That system can change time chain (which events happened when) of the game and create diffrent outcomes.

Well in round three, lost of thresomes. As i said even now this game is great but could be legendary.
 
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PyoT

Member
Sep 3, 2020
334
471
I like the system as is. Reminds me for example of Softhouse Chara's Wizard's Climber, stat raising sim with a gear towards NG+. Though I would say I'd appreciate more development of different starting points where not everything gets just repeated the same way if you progress far enough.

That being said all such considerations are secondary as unfortunately like with many games on this page the writing is pretty bad. The common error here is not taking care with run-on sentences, so all dialogue leans heavily towards that - endless chains of clauses just smashed together with commas. Full stops and conjunctions exist for a reason ^^;

And beyond that there's barely anything to it. Characterization is weak. There's no atmosphere, no wit, no style. It's just barely anything to logically connect one gif to the next, but (especially the sex scenes) are basically just carried by the real-porn collection. At that point though you might as well just go on pornhub or whatever and watch the clips there (there might even be more story to them than in the game ^^).

I know, "write better" is kinda useless as actionable feedback but sometimes that's what it boils down to. Yes, there's some other issues here or there (esp. branching options not being properly cleared; I'd also argue that energy and time consumption should for the most part be properly signalled), but that's all superficial opposed to, ie. (random scene example)
You lean in and try to kiss her, she reciprocates you immediately
[gif]
Your lust increased by 6
Susan's love for you increased by 3(18)


You make out for a while, then she says.
"That was very nice, I hoped you would do that"

Walk back to your room
Obv. this is just a rather minor scene so not saying it needs three chapters of Shakespearean tradegy to build up, but just something. And, well, some cleaning up of what's already there ^^;

edit: kinda feels like the tone is too harsh, sorry about that. I do stand by what I say, but I probably should have tried finding a nicer way to say it ^^;;;
 
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Lotrum

Member
Donor
Game Developer
Nov 11, 2023
169
431
I like the system as is. Reminds me for example of Softhouse Chara's Wizard's Climber, stat raising sim with a gear towards NG+. Though I would say I'd appreciate more development of different starting points where not everything gets just repeated the same way if you progress far enough.

That being said all such considerations are secondary as unfortunately like with many games on this page the writing is pretty bad. The common error here is not taking care with run-on sentences, so all dialogue leans heavily towards that - endless chains of clauses just smashed together with commas. Full stops and conjunctions exist for a reason ^^;

And beyond that there's barely anything to it. Characterization is weak. There's no atmosphere, no wit, no style. It's just barely anything to logically connect one gif to the next, but (especially the sex scenes) are basically just carried by the real-porn collection. At that point though you might as well just go on pornhub or whatever and watch the clips there (there might even be more story to them than in the game ^^).

I know, "write better" is kinda useless as actionable feedback but sometimes that's what it boils down to. Yes, there's some other issues here or there (esp. branching options not being properly cleared; I'd also argue that energy and time consumption should for the most part be properly signalled), but that's all superficial opposed to, ie. (random scene example)

Obv. this is just a rather minor scene so not saying it needs three chapters of Shakespearean tradegy to build up, but just something. And, well, some cleaning up of what's already there ^^;

edit: kinda feels like the tone is too harsh, sorry about that. I do stand by what I say, but I probably should have tried finding a nicer way to say it ^^;;;
Nah, it's fine, I mean, I'm not really a writer, and I've got to say that I feel like i have much more to offer in terms of game design than writing.
Some scenes are just a bit poor in dialogue because of no real reason, but most of them it's because writing multiple pieces of dialogues for many different possibile ramifications is something that becomes rather exhausting for me.

I usually try not use pieces of videos "as they are" and write a plot as an excuse to show that video, but i usually try take single sentences and bring them out of their original context to adapt them to something else.

That obviously isn't easy even for someone that is actually an inspired writer, but my focus isn't really writing "a better story" than the ones shown originally in the video, but a different one.

The idea behind the game is to create "addiction" and consequent engagement because of the incremental mechanics and stats, a great story would make that better, but would probably drive away focus from the rest, and again, sadly I'm just not too good at that.

Also not being native english speaker is a little drag on that too.

Thanks for the feedback anyway, there's a lot of stuff that is obviously within my reach to improve, and I will try to do that over time!
 

Darklord1234

Member
Jul 13, 2018
454
654
Thanks for the tip! Now anyone know what is up with the get Katrina to swallow achieve? I have gotten her too but no achieve. Is it a specific location?
 
Jul 9, 2017
22
36
Very excellent game - i'm a big fan of the achievement-hunting, especially how it pertains to a sort of rogue-like feel to the game.

Suggestions / feedback:
1. The "workouts are now 2% / 1 % more effective": Add in the total % achieved so far afterwards. So: "Workouts are now 2% more effective, totalling 13% " or something.

2.The Natasha sex progression has a veeery steep last level. In general, sex control seems to be lacking content around the 60-80 point mark.

3. The prices of popularity bonuses seem a fair bit overtuned, considering programming / working nets you between 20-40 $.
- ofcourse once you have Carol high enough, she becomes a good source of monies, but that's not clear.

4. After blackmailing the teacher, meeting her in the Pool has zero impact. There ought to at least be some mention / reaction from her. Instead it just goes directly to the same route as not blackmailing her.

5. The game really needs a "Skip to next day" button, for when you've exhausted what you wanted to do early so you dont have to click "relax" 9 times in a row.

6. Excellent progression on the different girls that have Anal option - would be nice to see it with the cafeteria lady as well (unless its already in and i just haven't found it yet).

7. I know there is an in-world reason for Susan character model changing (she puts more effort into seducing MC), but it would be nice to have an option for which of the models to use / a way to get the old Susan back.

8. Melanie: She's a bit of a bitch. Well done, I enjoy hating her.

9. Carol: After having sex with her, asking for sex again makes her refuse. Asking for Pussy ends in sex. It would be make more sense to either not have pussy end in sex, or have an additional check in there, like "Sneak it in" and "Respect her wishes" to progress it to sex - otherwise there's no reason in her denying sex.

10. Workout / Swim: If you dont have the energy to workout / swim, the button's shouldn't really be there. Instead a red text "You dont have enough energy for this" would be better.

11. Swimming with teacher: If you dont have the energy for this, the text ought to be red and not clickable". Should be a very easy boolean logic "If energy >= 12, ValidOption else InvalidOption" - that way you can also reuse the method other places in the code.

12. Lunchlady: So many clicks to get to the point you've gotten 10 times before. Once you've had sex with her, the whole "Get some dinner" -> "wait for her to finish", "let her choose" and "nah" ought to just be "get some dinner and head back to your place".

13. Natasha: So many clicks. First her door, then "give money", then "i get something in return", then whatever you choose. Give money and Something in return ought to be the same thing once you've done it 2. "Give money but get something in return" or something.
 

Lotrum

Member
Donor
Game Developer
Nov 11, 2023
169
431
Very excellent game - i'm a big fan of the achievement-hunting, especially how it pertains to a sort of rogue-like feel to the game.

Suggestions / feedback:
[...]
Thanks for your feedback, just a couple of notes:

7 : Susan's model is the same, she just changed a bit over the years and I thought this was a fun way to use that, but I was already thinking of making pre-change sex an option!

9: The idea, probably needs a bits more "words", but is that she's in denial about being ok to have sex with you, and she says she doesn't want to if asked directly. but when she gets aroused enough she eventually asks for that

Sneaking it in, is not a bad idea, even if it would probably have big negative consequences, could be an easier way to achieve that :D

12: There is already something like that, you mean even shorter?
 
Jan 18, 2021
329
564
Hi! I tried this game for the first time and I had fun. Thanks for this nice game! After a few restarts, I managed to unlock most of the achievements and it should be easy for me to get the remaining achievements after four more restarts (virginity to be lost to different girls).

Here is some feedback in no particular order:

1. I almost stopped playing when I read the third page of the intro that contains: "That school was full of cute girls, including your step-cousin Natasha." From my point of view, a game that unconditionally mentions a step-cousin instead of a cousin (or sister, aunt, mom, daughter, etc.) is already raising a red flag. Seriously, I almost stopped playing after reading that. I am glad that my curiosity won over my hatred for step-hypocrisy. It would be much better to have a customizable relationship by letting the player enter some text freely, which would then be saved in some variables that are reused later in the text. For example, the relationships could be entered in a sentence such as: "Natasha is your [step-cousin]. Others refer to you as her [step-cousin]." And that could be customized by the player to show: "Natasha is you [cousin]. Others refer to you as her [cousin]." Depending on how perverted you are, you could also try "[sister]/[brother]", "[granddaughter]/[grandpa]" or whatever you can dream of.

2. The sex scenes with different girls have very different energy costs. More than once I had my energy going below zero because I did not remember how much a specific scene would cost. This resulted in a forced sleep and a disruption of my schedule that I could have avoided if the energy costs had been mentioned upfront. Mentioning the (exact or approximate) duration would also be nice.

3. It would be nice to use a consistent style for the sentences that are supposed to represent what the MC is thinking. Sometimes this is shown as plain text in the page, sometimes this is shown as text in parenthesis inside a dialogue widget, and I think that I also saw something in italics. A bit more consistency would be nice. Some Twine games such as "Sluttown USA" and others are using a dialogue widget for that, but with a different style when the MC is talking or thinking (same avatar image but different color and font style).

4. Layla seems to be a recent addition to the game. This is confirmed by the Changelog that I just checked, but I did not pay much attention to that when I started playing this game for the first time. I was hoping that raising my strength high enough would allow me to go beyond Layla's BJ challenge scene and unlock several sex scenes and new achievements. Now that I have unlocked most of the achievements, I understand that these scenes and achievements are not in the game yet. It would be nice to have more warnings about that, besides the "work in progress" warning that appears when trying to resist twice in the BJ challenge scene.

5. On Jane's corruption path, at some point she stops asking for money. But the dialogues do not take that into account.
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6. The sound in the videos is rather disturbing because some videos have blanks when the actors are saying something that does not fit the story. This is disturbing when the video has a lot of background noises, because the sudden absence of sound is very noticeable. Instead of muting the audio track completely, it would be better to replace that part of the track with some copies of background noises taken from another part of the video.

7. Several achievements are mutually exclusive: solving the Tyler problem in different ways, blackmailing Ms Pearl in different ways, virginity lost to different girls, etc. It would be nice to mention that in the intro, and even more in the scene with the scientists that appears between rounds. The scientists could explain that it is important to explore different paths in the simulation and try different things because the results of these different choices can improve the success of the weight loss program, or something like that. The intro could also state more explicitly that the MC is supposed to run the simulation several times in a row because a single run would only provide a small part of the expected benefits.
 
4.60 star(s) 56 Votes