Deadlyreaper

Active Member
Nov 20, 2017
738
694
All jokes aside this is my issue as well. From a writing point of view this is the AAA Game or the Major league however you wanna call it.

Not only do you get writing for the characters that is believable to the point you actually care for them early on you also got a scene Setup that interacts with the written dialouge and the narration happens over said background in a scene or literally the background. Thats like understanding that your medium of writing is limited to imagination so you have to tell the emotion or situation over the scene and the background or sound because you could never express the feeling you want to transport over written words alone.

Understanding this issue is one thing. Nailing it from the start a completely different. To give some examples on what i mean.

Right at the start the drunken MC dreams (foreshadowing) of his wife when it is actually Macy. The Reader/Player has no clue yet what exactly happens aside from being drunk. Once the moment happens and he realizes it is macy and not his wife the reader/player also realizes that the same moment the MC does.

Later in the game you to the musem with denise and you can not only see her anxiety you can almost feel it. At first she enjoys watching pictures with you and discussing the topic you see which already can make someone feel out of place but then BOOM the museum gets crowded and denise becomes visible scared. The backround adds sound of a crowd and the dialouge tansfers the rest that it is better to go.

In the new update you get a comfy feeling by cuddling in front of a fireplace and rainfall dropping sounds in which again the dialouge is only the tip of the iceberg finishing the already established scene for the reader/player. That is literally understanding what your written words can and can not do. I see many games describing the scene instead of this.

Remember the bear? Absolutely pointless for some people. But no one can deny they started laughing once macy went full kung fu in the background only to see the bear approach and after he left macy almost jumping over the MC and Denise. Not a single word was used to transport this to the audience. This shit was hilarious from start to finish.

The point i try to make is this. Of course there are some very well written games out there. But setting the scenes to this level of narration without narrating a single word and doing it over the background, scene and added sound effects is something i have never seen anyone do to this level.

And the most important points. The Banana Dance. The Pirate message. The Demon Macy. While the first 2 are actually funny and serve a completely different purpose it is the Demon Macy who got to me. Not because she looks amazing (Thanks for that naughtyroad) but because it reflects her inner demon and the struggle she put herself in. In her eyes she is a monster that needs to be chained down or she will hurt and probably kill everyone around her before ending up alone in a deep cavern again. Chaining herself up there in order to not hurt anyone again.
Denise while most of the time very naive is a loving sister who unchains macy because she knows deep down in hearth that her sister is a loving human being that deserves love and a family that cares about her.

You get that already by the dialouge and the events in the game but to actually portray her that way and give the audience the scene in which you see how she actually feels about herself and how she percieves herself in the world is not only a very powerful message for the future narration of the game, it is setting an example of how a writer would handle this fight with someones inner demon in a book or a novel with exactly this topic.
It also gives the shy and sometimes naive Denise Power over the inner Demon of Macy. Little by little the chains come off. The grief and the self doubt fall apart by the Loving care of Denise.

So you basically get 3 stories in one (MC and his wards fighting the grief they all suffer from including the MC letting his Wife finally go and focus on the future, Denise overcoming her anxiety and shyness in the world, Macy overcoming her guilt and self hatred) with excellent writing, portraying and scenes on a movie level.

That is FAR FAR beyond what anyone has done so far and deserves it's own price in my book.

Edit: And yes i could write entire pages about things that are almost perfect in this game but the mod would probably kill me if i do......
yes what else can you say??? you really got to the point, i can only agree 100%


My preference is Denise. :)
Such a funny and innocent playful character. No small part due to writing.
i also love denise the expression on the face when she is scolding/angry or when she is scared she is just great
 

Gmandingo

Active Member
Nov 3, 2019
512
404
I love the writing the story so far is really good and some of the scenes just get me in the feels I mean I actually got teary eyed reading some of the dialogue and the girls are well designed just waiting and hoping we get more soon!
 
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Miðgarðsormr

Engaged Member
Oct 1, 2017
2,472
6,086
yes what else can you say??? you really got to the point, i can only agree 100%
No clue i can repeat something i said earlier in the thread about why this game is also interesting for writers or screenwriters in general.

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Nothing ever happens in this game. Couldn't even get through the latest chapter, just the same uninteresting converstations over and over with little to no change. Shame, I started off liking it but it is way too slow of a burn even for me.
If you looking for a fap game you are in the wrong thread. You have literally hundreds of generic blondes you can fingerblast in 2 minutes or less on this forum. But if you want an interesting story with unique characters and dialouge this is the place for you to stay.
 
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Abhai

Devoted Member
Sep 12, 2018
8,956
36,976
No clue i can repeat something i said earlier in the thread about why this game is also interesting for writers or screenwriters in general.

You got the 5 stages of grief in this game so you even got a psychological point of view on the entire story in 3 layers.
1. By the characters itself who each on their own are in a different stage of grief.
2. By the background and events happening inside the story. Little hints etc.
3. The 3 main characters get trough the last stage all at the same time together as a family.

Lot and his daughters are in this game who probably become on of the reasons denise acts the way she does. I mean Lot was a holy man right? Be that as it may the fact that you know what kind of ART you can place at a museum scene speaks of itself. Not only is the portrayal of Lot and his daughters fitting for a museum but to actually know which pictures you need to take and place them to backup your hidden source of influence is a genius move. People who know about Art instantly get the hint and people who do not at least can see the pictures and take the hints they implicate. So either way it is a win win situation.

The contrast between content that hits you right in the feels and the right amount of humor at the right moment is what we writers call a "Emotional Hook" and to place one on purpose is no easy task especially if you start writing. But naughtyroad does this so good he makes it look like as easy as walking in the park.

You literally could take this game to a writing school or university and disect each and every scene to teach newcomers how it is done. Discuss what they feel in certain scenes or what feeling should be transported to the audience and after that explain why it works.

Other devs could learn alot here. Not just in terms of writing. But screenplay, Background hints, foreshadowing, how to make 3 dimensional characters. How less is more in terms of a good story. Etc.

If someone tells you naughtyroad did all that by accident he is lying. Nothing of that is by accident that is pure skill. Doesn't matter if learned somewhere or born with this. I know ppl who do stuff like that for a living and could not pull that off with their live on the line. So this is damn impressive for a side project.


If you looking for a fap game you are in the wrong thread. You have literally hundreds of generic blondes you can fingerblast in 2 minutes or less on this forum. But if you want an interesting story with unique characters and dialouge this is the place for you to stay.
damn man, dont get me wrong here - i got you are probably a writer too, yet unless there are some hot Macy's pictures, here or there, those huuuge blocks of texts/posts could be a bit too heavy to endure.:BootyTime:
if not Macy pictures, at least add spoiler/s here and there:HideThePain:
 

Miðgarðsormr

Engaged Member
Oct 1, 2017
2,472
6,086
damn man, dont get me wrong here - i got you are probably a writer too, yet unless there are some hot Macy's pictures, here or there, those huuuge blocks of texts/posts could be a bit too heavy to endure.:BootyTime:
if not Macy pictures, at least add spoiler/s here and there:HideThePain:
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naughtyroad

Active Member
Donor
Game Developer
Jan 8, 2019
953
12,845
Someone who have "charlotte ICU girlsfocus.WEBP" mine is empty....
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Are you using my official builds or something someone else modded, repacked, or baked a APK from? Official builds can be found in the OP.
 

4Finger

Engaged Member
Nov 24, 2016
2,030
1,391
Which version (platform), because I played the Windows version of the game downloaded from the NOPY OP over the past two days and have not run into that error?
Pc.. But i downloaded that from another place, so now is this wonderful update finish.... Now we only can do is waiting for next update...
 

TheReDeeMeR

Member
Mar 18, 2018
367
646
First time when i found about this game and what can I say...interesting faces no these girls :sneaky:
Gonna play it :) can't wait to "dig in" :devilish:
 

meshmoshmish

New Member
May 10, 2020
7
0
Hello : Does Anyone have saved file until chapter 4 ? I reinstalled Windows and lost all the games I and saved files I have .
 
4.70 star(s) 488 Votes