- Sep 21, 2019
- 179
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Because if you don't point out flaws they can't be fixed. Minor errors will happen to everyone, but the difference between "wander" and "wonder" is much greater than the difference between "the" and "teh". It breaks the flow of reading, especially when subsequent words are also severely misspelled, and interferes with immersion. This is also an early version which makes it easier to fix the errors now.
- May 12, 2017
- 29
- 41
- Jul 14, 2017
- 81
- 247
Hey guys,
thanks for all the comments, really helpful stuf!
some thinks from my side to point out:
- grammer!
really sorry about that one, def. not one of my strong suits, will be looked at in future updates. And I think I rushed that part of the release a bit. English is not my native language but I do admit it's sloppy to have so many errors in grammer
on a side note, there isn't much of a readable storyline because in my experience you would scroll right past it anyway, but thats no excuse for mistakes.
-file size
I did my best to make a 0.1 version that already has a lot of content because I don’t like the games that are first released with almost nothing.
But I do agree that 2+ gig is al lot (too mutch) so I will check if I can reduce that without losing quality. (Webm sounds like a good option)
- story and playability
there is actually more than just the one or two 'free' and random accessible stuf the unlock. raise the affection of the characters a decent amount to unlock much more. also the sequences that come after a while are not just some random pics.
you also have to buy one (or more) items from the store to unlock events.
and if you don't want to work for it then I think everybody here knows the HTML 'cheat' of adjusting variables.
thanks for the quick comments (hasn't even been up for 24 hours xD ), do keep em coming because I think most of them are helpful!
thanks for all the comments, really helpful stuf!
some thinks from my side to point out:
- grammer!
really sorry about that one, def. not one of my strong suits, will be looked at in future updates. And I think I rushed that part of the release a bit. English is not my native language but I do admit it's sloppy to have so many errors in grammer
on a side note, there isn't much of a readable storyline because in my experience you would scroll right past it anyway, but thats no excuse for mistakes.
-file size
I did my best to make a 0.1 version that already has a lot of content because I don’t like the games that are first released with almost nothing.
But I do agree that 2+ gig is al lot (too mutch) so I will check if I can reduce that without losing quality. (Webm sounds like a good option)
- story and playability
there is actually more than just the one or two 'free' and random accessible stuf the unlock. raise the affection of the characters a decent amount to unlock much more. also the sequences that come after a while are not just some random pics.
you also have to buy one (or more) items from the store to unlock events.
and if you don't want to work for it then I think everybody here knows the HTML 'cheat' of adjusting variables.
thanks for the quick comments (hasn't even been up for 24 hours xD ), do keep em coming because I think most of them are helpful!
good start
advice as you have been told change the gif by webm to reduce the size of the game
good selection of neighbors but you can always do a survey to see who would be the new flaws in the game
I personally would like to see Mia Kalifa and Lupe Fuentes
have you thought about doing 2 love and slave routes? They are usually very popular and interesting because they give you options and variety to add situations, etc.
And another tip if you want to stand out and do something new and be the first to use it would take advantage of the fact that they are becoming more popular and there are more and more famous videofakes to add some to the "neighborhood" who did not want to get intimate with scarlett johanshon or Emna Watson? I of course if XD
and adding some background or text to the scenes to give more context to the plot and characters would also be nice, that needs to be improved
It would also be nice if the protagonist had a goal to fulfill or even several NPCs that were rivals or things like that to give more interest to the game
advice as you have been told change the gif by webm to reduce the size of the game
good selection of neighbors but you can always do a survey to see who would be the new flaws in the game
I personally would like to see Mia Kalifa and Lupe Fuentes
have you thought about doing 2 love and slave routes? They are usually very popular and interesting because they give you options and variety to add situations, etc.
And another tip if you want to stand out and do something new and be the first to use it would take advantage of the fact that they are becoming more popular and there are more and more famous videofakes to add some to the "neighborhood" who did not want to get intimate with scarlett johanshon or Emna Watson? I of course if XD
and adding some background or text to the scenes to give more context to the plot and characters would also be nice, that needs to be improved
It would also be nice if the protagonist had a goal to fulfill or even several NPCs that were rivals or things like that to give more interest to the game
It is good to see Japenese girls here. I have never seem any game put those girls in to the game. I like it!
Last edited:
- Sep 4, 2017
- 97
- 170
[*wander through] If your spelling is that bad in the description the game must be nearly unplayable.]
[The screenshots also have 2 typos minimum, I hope English is the devs second language..]
[This has "abandoned" written all over it. I give it 2 months tops before the dev pulls the plug.]
There is a big difference between constructive criticism and flat out being a dick. I was mostly replying to the people who were kinda being jerks with their replies. Anyone else that was being helpful, i had no issue with.
Went through the game, I can see there some primitive system in place, it could be good if fully develop.
I come up with some lengthy suggestion, will try my best brake it down and make it easy to read.
1. "Game" Type
I can see you're trying to make a resource management game. Currently there're "Time" "Money" and "Accessibility"(Upgrade, if you will).
For me, you don't need more resource to make it good, just make it serving purpose. Basic solution as follow:
Quest system:
Giving player goal to balance resource and time to get to goal.
For example: First time meet Nicollete, quest pop out: You need to bang her within 7 days before she moves or has her boyfriend move in with her.
Solution: Get job, get gift, get to goal on 6 day. Or, get job, get better job, get to goal on 5th day. Balance between upgrade and time is required.
Reward: Not just getting to watch some Nicollete sex picture, make it in-game reward too, 2nd money source from Nicollete, having access to bossiness center to bang more women, etc.
You can setup for more long goal with bigger reward, like taking control school or church or something, giving 100 days to do it.
Accessibility, Upgrade of Upgrade:
Currently value for women is affection, and it unlocks action you could take to them. It works, but primitive, if you're comfortable with writing, I would suggest increase affection also change the scene when you do the same thing. How much they into the sex or how far would they give it to.
Theme, Fappibility, or fetish if you would:
This could be the core thing about the porn-game, what's your "preference". It would define your writing and how the game move on. Currently I can't see any obvious theme in there. But I would suggest you, for a passion or indie game, try not to extend the themes too much, a lot of games was dragged down to almost a halt because of this, if you want a player-dom, devil magic, corruption of game world, stick with it, don't do TF or player-sub route before even start making the system working.
sorry for long post, thanks for reading.
I come up with some lengthy suggestion, will try my best brake it down and make it easy to read.
1. "Game" Type
I can see you're trying to make a resource management game. Currently there're "Time" "Money" and "Accessibility"(Upgrade, if you will).
For me, you don't need more resource to make it good, just make it serving purpose. Basic solution as follow:
Quest system:
Giving player goal to balance resource and time to get to goal.
For example: First time meet Nicollete, quest pop out: You need to bang her within 7 days before she moves or has her boyfriend move in with her.
Solution: Get job, get gift, get to goal on 6 day. Or, get job, get better job, get to goal on 5th day. Balance between upgrade and time is required.
Reward: Not just getting to watch some Nicollete sex picture, make it in-game reward too, 2nd money source from Nicollete, having access to bossiness center to bang more women, etc.
You can setup for more long goal with bigger reward, like taking control school or church or something, giving 100 days to do it.
Accessibility, Upgrade of Upgrade:
Currently value for women is affection, and it unlocks action you could take to them. It works, but primitive, if you're comfortable with writing, I would suggest increase affection also change the scene when you do the same thing. How much they into the sex or how far would they give it to.
Theme, Fappibility, or fetish if you would:
This could be the core thing about the porn-game, what's your "preference". It would define your writing and how the game move on. Currently I can't see any obvious theme in there. But I would suggest you, for a passion or indie game, try not to extend the themes too much, a lot of games was dragged down to almost a halt because of this, if you want a player-dom, devil magic, corruption of game world, stick with it, don't do TF or player-sub route before even start making the system working.
sorry for long post, thanks for reading.
- Jun 11, 2019
- 146
- 153
- Jul 5, 2017
- 475
- 747
So yeah, it looks like the basic premise of a Real porn image/gif game, so nothing new here, same models being used in many ways as most others. Some proof reading and spelling checks needed here and there, but atleast sentences seem to make sence in a grammar sense of way (we are not giving anyone the cancer). Best thing i can say is just do a spelling check with MS Word or google(translate) on the sections you write to get the few typos out (trust me i make loads myself without noticing) and then just focus on content and the direction you want to take. Dont let the critical voices discourage you (even mine) and keep up the work.
Good luck.
Good luck.
Hi Drummer. I downloaded and tried your game for a bit this evening.
The basic mechanics are there, and look to work as intended. The pictures (stills and animated) are of good quality, though as others mentioned before me there's better formats you could convert to for a lower file size. The navigation of the game reminds me of the classic Choose Your Own Adventure book series.
However... the text has a massive volume of spelling and grammar errors. So frequently, that it breaks immersion. Additionally, while I know you said earlier in this thread that you don't have much in the way of transitional text or descriptions within the game because "people will just click past that anyway," some of us want there to be a bit more text. Some of us like to be teased a bit first, flirted with, made to feel like there's something about us within the story that is making the women want us. If I just need a gallery of Bangbros models to get off... there are many of those available without having to download 2.4GB of data all at once first. I'm not saying there has to be a complex plot (there doesn't), or that the women need to start by playing hard to get (though having one that starts tsundere can be an interesting challenge). But in the sexual visual novel games (which this is kind of an offshoot of), they don't just go from an introduction to a woman to an image/animation of them naked and riding a cock. There's usually some dialog between those two steps, or a "combat", or at least a physical description of them grabbing you by your necktie and pulling you into the copy room where they start making out with you while loosening your belt. There's also a physical description of what they're doing to you, and maybe what they're moaning/gasping/screaming as they reach a climax. Some people like a bit of erotica with their sexy pictures. A good example in here would be the sandbox game Paradise Island, which has you get to know each of the women you interact with, and you have to learn what each likes and doesn't, and then when you do earn a sex scene there's dirty talk and graphic descriptions.
TL;DR: An interesting skeleton of a game, but it relies solely upon the visuals and not the writing. I'm willing to help with correcting the text that's there, and I might even be willing to help you with ideas on how to take this from a navigation puzzle to something where there's content that appeals to the reader's mind as well as their eyes.
The basic mechanics are there, and look to work as intended. The pictures (stills and animated) are of good quality, though as others mentioned before me there's better formats you could convert to for a lower file size. The navigation of the game reminds me of the classic Choose Your Own Adventure book series.
However... the text has a massive volume of spelling and grammar errors. So frequently, that it breaks immersion. Additionally, while I know you said earlier in this thread that you don't have much in the way of transitional text or descriptions within the game because "people will just click past that anyway," some of us want there to be a bit more text. Some of us like to be teased a bit first, flirted with, made to feel like there's something about us within the story that is making the women want us. If I just need a gallery of Bangbros models to get off... there are many of those available without having to download 2.4GB of data all at once first. I'm not saying there has to be a complex plot (there doesn't), or that the women need to start by playing hard to get (though having one that starts tsundere can be an interesting challenge). But in the sexual visual novel games (which this is kind of an offshoot of), they don't just go from an introduction to a woman to an image/animation of them naked and riding a cock. There's usually some dialog between those two steps, or a "combat", or at least a physical description of them grabbing you by your necktie and pulling you into the copy room where they start making out with you while loosening your belt. There's also a physical description of what they're doing to you, and maybe what they're moaning/gasping/screaming as they reach a climax. Some people like a bit of erotica with their sexy pictures. A good example in here would be the sandbox game Paradise Island, which has you get to know each of the women you interact with, and you have to learn what each likes and doesn't, and then when you do earn a sex scene there's dirty talk and graphic descriptions.
TL;DR: An interesting skeleton of a game, but it relies solely upon the visuals and not the writing. I'm willing to help with correcting the text that's there, and I might even be willing to help you with ideas on how to take this from a navigation puzzle to something where there's content that appeals to the reader's mind as well as their eyes.
It seems interresting, almost all HTML games are transformation/sissy/gay stuff games. Nice to see that more are done without these elements.
quick translation : Pe5218 appreciate that there is japanese girl, which doesn't happen in this kind of game.
Played it for some time, majority of the points has already been mentioned. However I'd like to add:
- If you change the video format also consider the ratio and size of the videos. Some are okay but some are simply to large, even for large size screens (e.g. in the goth section)
- There are so many different spots you can visit that you almost get lost but there is no activity available. Please focus on putting more content into one location before opening up another one
- Game basics are there however the time is not passing so I can endlessly click on one character to talk with and get 100% affection.
For me the game in terms of development is in version 0.0.1, nonetheless keep up the good work. Ik kijk uit naar de volgende versie
- If you change the video format also consider the ratio and size of the videos. Some are okay but some are simply to large, even for large size screens (e.g. in the goth section)
- There are so many different spots you can visit that you almost get lost but there is no activity available. Please focus on putting more content into one location before opening up another one
- Game basics are there however the time is not passing so I can endlessly click on one character to talk with and get 100% affection.
For me the game in terms of development is in version 0.0.1, nonetheless keep up the good work. Ik kijk uit naar de volgende versie
The old key in the bookstore gives you access to the church's basement, where there's a succubus.