VN Ren'Py Origin Story [v0.6.0] [JDOR]

[Ciaran8023]

Well, took a while to get through and.. not entirely sure what I feel about it. One one hand there are some interesting characters but a fair few of them feel strangely flat if that makes sense?
The plot is kind of interesting but my god the MC could have had a much more interesting power than "MC MAGIC DICK GUD, BRAIN GO MUSH" type shit. Like, you're working within the constraints of unbridled imagination, I feel like there could have been something more interesting that still would have worked within the framework of "good guys want him, bad guys want him".

I think Evelyn could have used a lot more exploration to make her feel less flat, having some conversations about her fears and apprehensions and where she might want the relationship to go would've made her more interesting than being so gung-ho about the MC dippin' tip in anything that breathes with a useful power.

Parker's daughter (I genuinely cannot even remember her name) feels utterly superfluous at this point of the game. We know nothing about her except what she works with, she's basically contributed nothing other than being a slight plot mcguffin (to put MC into contact with Lake) and she just feels like she doesn't matter in the grand scheme of.. anything really.

Parker

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Would be the most logical subversion of expectation as we're expected to think that Scarlet Shadow is a bad guy and connected to bad guys given that we've heard about her killing people.

Amber is honestly one of my favourite VN LI's, while some other characters were flat, Amber was knocked out of the park imo. She puts up a tough front but it's pretty easy to tell that she's got some problems even with her being invisible, then she gets really vulnerable with the MC and the entire pacing of it and framing is just super well done. Ends up being very wholesome and she's generally just a really interesting person (discounting the invisibility perv shit).

Steel is also very well done, complex character with some heavy backstory but handled quite well. Can't really tell much with the other supes, Moonmoon and green chick were both pretty flat aswell at this point in time.


Honestly it's hard for me to pinpoint exactly why certain characters feel a bit flat, because looking at them objectively and the dialogue etc, they should work just fine.

I'll be checking out the updates from now on since decent superpower games are pretty rare honestly, I can't remember coming across another one that wasn't just mindless pornfodder before, even though this toes the line from time to time with the MC having 'ugly fat bastard magic dick' hentai powers to just seduce every living female.

 

[PickerLewd]

Would be the most logical subversion of expectation as we're expected to think that Scarlet Shadow is a bad guy and connected to bad guys given that we've heard about her killing people.

Yes, from the scene where Scarlet Shadow enters the bedroom with the sleeping MC and leaves without doing anything, I already suspect that she is not the villain that the news makes her out to be.

 

[HornyyPussy]

Well, took a while to get through and.. not entirely sure what I feel about it. One one hand there are some interesting characters but a fair few of them feel strangely flat if that makes sense?
The plot is kind of interesting but my god the MC could have had a much more interesting power than "MC MAGIC DICK GUD, BRAIN GO MUSH" type shit. Like, you're working within the constraints of unbridled imagination, I feel like there could have been something more interesting that still would have worked within the framework of "good guys want him, bad guys want him".

I think Evelyn could have used a lot more exploration to make her feel less flat, having some conversations about her fears and apprehensions and where she might want the relationship to go would've made her more interesting than being so gung-ho about the MC dippin' tip in anything that breathes with a useful power.

Parker's daughter (I genuinely cannot even remember her name) feels utterly superfluous at this point of the game. We know nothing about her except what she works with, she's basically contributed nothing other than being a slight plot mcguffin (to put MC into contact with Lake) and she just feels like she doesn't matter in the grand scheme of.. anything really.

Parker

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Would be the most logical subversion of expectation as we're expected to think that Scarlet Shadow is a bad guy and connected to bad guys given that we've heard about her killing people.

Amber is honestly one of my favourite VN LI's, while some other characters were flat, Amber was knocked out of the park imo. She puts up a tough front but it's pretty easy to tell that she's got some problems even with her being invisible, then she gets really vulnerable with the MC and the entire pacing of it and framing is just super well done. Ends up being very wholesome and she's generally just a really interesting person (discounting the invisibility perv shit).

Steel is also very well done, complex character with some heavy backstory but handled quite well. Can't really tell much with the other supes, Moonmoon and green chick were both pretty flat aswell at this point in time.


Honestly it's hard for me to pinpoint exactly why certain characters feel a bit flat, because looking at them objectively and the dialogue etc, they should work just fine.

I'll be checking out the updates from now on since decent superpower games are pretty rare honestly, I can't remember coming across another one that wasn't just mindless pornfodder before, even though this toes the line from time to time with the MC having 'ugly fat bastard magic dick' hentai powers to just seduce every living female.

Parker is not a villain, most likely she's working behind the scenes against the government.

 

[Bommols01]

What the important new on dev patreon guys? hope the game update soon.

 

[HornyyPussy]

What the important new on dev patreon guys? hope the game update soon.

Think about which date it is and you'll have a clue......

 

[Ciaran8023]

Parker is not a villain, most likely she's working behind the scenes against the government.

Issue here is that the government is the obvious bad guy, and you'll never have two larger entities that then fight for the same cause against the government if you follow writing tropes, meaning that either Parker or the unknown individual that Scarlet Shadow works for has to be a villain.

And given what we've been shown thus far, Scarlet Shadow seems to be checking in on the MC and whoever she's working for apparently has connections with his aunt aswell as the game dropping a lot of intel on that Scarlet Shadow is 'killing people' but never being shown more or given more info than just that, the most logical subversion would be that Parker is up to no good.
Which would also explain why she's apparently treating MC's existence like a fucking science experiment, on top of working for a company that supposedly makes vaccines, which makes me think that they're likely doing experiments on the behalf of the government that aren't exactly above board.

The amount of times in fiction where a non-transparent pharmaceutical company have been the good guys are EXTREMELY few and far between so right now all the red flags are pretty heavily in Parkers corner.

 

[HornyyPussy]

Issue here is that the government is the obvious bad guy, and you'll never have two larger entities that then fight for the same cause against the government if you follow writing tropes, meaning that either Parker or the unknown individual that Scarlet Shadow works for has to be a villain.

And given what we've been shown thus far, Scarlet Shadow seems to be checking in on the MC and whoever she's working for apparently has connections with his aunt aswell as the game dropping a lot of intel on that Scarlet Shadow is 'killing people' but never being shown more or given more info than just that, the most logical subversion would be that Parker is up to no good.
Which would also explain why she's apparently treating MC's existence like a fucking science experiment, on top of working for a company that supposedly makes vaccines, which makes me think that they're likely doing experiments on the behalf of the government that aren't exactly above board.

The amount of times in fiction where a non-transparent pharmaceutical company have been the good guys are EXTREMELY few and far between so right now all the red flags are pretty heavily in Parkers corner.

I'll bet my right nut that she's not a villain, she's trying to revert the mutation most likely. Not to mention that she's one of the main Li's.

 

[Ciaran8023]

I'll bet my right nut that she's not a villain, she's trying to revert the mutation most likely. Not to mention that she's one of the main Li's.

Trying to revert the mutation doesn't exactly give any sort of answer for that last scene, that last scene was framed in a "how's our experiment doing" type of way and not "is this something we can use to help" type of way.
And her being a main LI doesn't mean that she won't be a villain, this wouldn't be the first game to make a villain LI that's a manipulative piece of shit or potentially give a "wanna back the bad guys or good guys" choice towards the later half of the game.

Basically the only thing that's pointing her towards not being a villain is just wanting her to not be a villain, every other part is either extremely shady or something not being right.
If she isn't a villain, why is Scarlet Shadow having to sneak around her? Why is Scarlet Shadow's employer keeping such a close eye on him? Why would his supposed aunt not be in touch with the family if they were the good guys? Something just doesn't add up in that equation and from what we've seen, Scarlet Shadow would've had every opportunity to either kidnap the MC or do something else to him.. but they're just making sure that he's alright, which is weird if Parker was a good guy.

 

[HornyyPussy]

Trying to revert the mutation doesn't exactly give any sort of answer for that last scene, that last scene was framed in a "how's our experiment doing" type of way and not "is this something we can use to help" type of way.
And her being a main LI doesn't mean that she won't be a villain, this wouldn't be the first game to make a villain LI that's a manipulative piece of shit or potentially give a "wanna back the bad guys or good guys" choice towards the later half of the game.

Basically the only thing that's pointing her towards not being a villain is just wanting her to not be a villain, every other part is either extremely shady or something not being right.
If she isn't a villain, why is Scarlet Shadow having to sneak around her? Why is Scarlet Shadow's employer keeping such a close eye on him? Why would his supposed aunt not be in touch with the family if they were the good guys? Something just doesn't add up in that equation and from what we've seen, Scarlet Shadow would've had every opportunity to either kidnap the MC or do something else to him.. but they're just making sure that he's alright, which is weird if Parker was a good guy.

We'll just have to agree to disagree and keep playing and see what happens.

 

[Ciaran8023]

We'll just have to agree to disagree and keep playing and see what happens.

Yeah that's fair. There's also a possibility that given that one of the theories for the death of MC's parents was some sort of mind control, that she's also under the influence of the same person that caused it, but it's hard to back it up as a theory as we have gotten no flashbacks to see what she was like before everything went down and if her behaviour has changed in any way.

So yeah, just have to wait and see.

 

[FatGiant]

First, I can't see Parker as a villain. So far she hasn't showed any signs of that, except for a conversation with a researcher that she has to manipulate and obfuscate.

Second, it is obvious she has some type of "power". That she is using it to maintain and probably also did for obtaining, her spot in a Corporate giant. That doesn't make her Evil, only exceptionally smart and able to survive the fate that MC's parents suffered.

Third, I want her. No, I have to be even more assertive, I HAVE to have her. No, it isn't just a fuck, no, she's an extremely interesting woman, I want her as Queen of my Harem of Super-Heroines. I want her "Power".

So, no. I don't buy this idea that she's a villain, and even if she is, I want a redemption arc............ because.

Peace

 

[e6mill]

Second, it is obvious she has some type of "power". That she is using it to maintain and probably also did for obtaining, her spot in a Corporate giant. That doesn't make her Evil, only exceptionally smart and able to survive the fate that MC's parents suffered.

She has the same power that Bruce Wayne and Tony Stark have - oodles of money.

 

[Elduriel]

First, I can't see Parker as a villain. So far she hasn't showed any signs of that, except for a conversation with a researcher that she has to manipulate and obfuscate.

Second, it is obvious she has some type of "power". That she is using it to maintain and probably also did for obtaining, her spot in a Corporate giant. That doesn't make her Evil, only exceptionally smart and able to survive the fate that MC's parents suffered.

Third, I want her. No, I have to be even more assertive, I HAVE to have her. No, it isn't just a fuck, no, she's an extremely interesting woman, I want her as Queen of my Harem of Super-Heroines. I want her "Power".

So, no. I don't buy this idea that she's a villain, and even if she is, I want a redemption arc............ because.

Peace

whether or not she is a villain/antagonist or whatever, I wouldn't mind either way. For now it's too early to say, but if I had to put money on it, probably not. But she has an agenda, which she keeps secret... that I don't like. Also not really interested in her as an LI, her boobs are way too big for my liking

 

[HornyyPussy]

whether or not she is a villain/antagonist or whatever, I wouldn't mind either way. For now it's too early to say, but if I had to put money on it, probably not. But she has an agenda, which she keeps secret... that I don't like. Also not really interested in her as an LI, her boobs are way too big for my liking

 

[Bad Wolf]

First, I can't see Parker as a villain. So far she hasn't showed any signs of that, except for a conversation with a researcher that she has to manipulate and obfuscate.

Second, it is obvious she has some type of "power". That she is using it to maintain and probably also did for obtaining, her spot in a Corporate giant. That doesn't make her Evil, only exceptionally smart and able to survive the fate that MC's parents suffered.

Third, I want her. No, I have to be even more assertive, I HAVE to have her. No, it isn't just a fuck, no, she's an extremely interesting woman, I want her as Queen of my Harem of Super-Heroines. I want her "Power".

So, no. I don't buy this idea that she's a villain, and even if she is, I want a redemption arc............ because.

Peace

I have to disagree. She's the perfect super villain. Kind, caring, yet scheming. She has an agenda, that involves the MC. Which is why she's worried that she'll fall in love with him and spill the beans. So, she distances herself.

 

[Ciaran8023]

I have to disagree. She's the perfect super villain. Kind, caring, yet scheming. She has an agenda, that involves the MC. Which is why she's worried that she'll fall in love with him and spill the beans. So, she distances herself.

This is the same thing I had in mind, it's the perfect set up for a villain in a typical subversion of expectation setup as it not only sets up a pretty brutal reveal, but also plants some seeds of doubt in a viewers mind since we've only ever seen her be "good" towards MC etc.

Maybe I've just read too much fiction in my lifetime.

 

[FatGiant]

whether or not she is a villain/antagonist or whatever, I wouldn't mind either way. For now it's too early to say, but if I had to put money on it, probably not. But she has an agenda, which she keeps secret... that I don't like. Also not really interested in her as an LI, her boobs are way too big for my liking

I hope that whatever Supernatural Force commands this Plane of Existance, will forever save us from the HORROR of Big Breasted Women. (NOT)

 

[Bad Wolf]

This is the same thing I had in mind, it's the perfect set up for a villain in a typical subversion of expectation setup as it not only sets up a pretty brutal reveal, but also plants some seeds of doubt in a viewers mind since we've only ever seen her be "good" towards MC etc.

Maybe I've just read too much fiction in my lifetime.

Maybe I have also. I'm old af, so I've probably read more than you have.

 

[FatGiant]

Maybe I have also. I'm old af, so I've probably read more than you have.

I dunno mate... by the time I turned 10, I had read half of a decent Library... it took me 20 years to slow down... I don't think age matters that much.

 

[Bad Wolf]

I dunno mate... by the time I turned 10, I had read half of a decent Library... it took me 20 years to slow down... I don't think age matters that much.

You're probably right. I wasn't much of a book nerd back when I was a child. I was mainly absorbed with my studies, sports and working out. Which didn't leave much time for recreational reading.