5.00 star(s) 10 Votes

Caucasus77

Newbie
Oct 9, 2021
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So first you said it doesn't makes sense to keep Brandi locked to Dylan while he fucks every girl he wants which I agree 100%, later you said there's no need for a 180 so tell me which way do you choose, theres no neutral ground here.

Everything you said about chapter 9 is true, the fairier exchange was the way to follow, Gina was there she could convinced both of them while Rory just listen (because he know he fucked up with his weird behavior towards Brandi) she was disgusted by Rorys previous actions and in chapter 10 out of nowhere she was like lets fuck behind Dylans back WTF LOL.

Brandi could be like the other girls theres still time to fix this, PS can do it using Gina Ayanna Petes wife and now Kelly hell even Dylan to convince Brandi, I have a few ideas how to do it in the most natural way possible.
I think I expressed myself poorly when I mentioned Brandi's 180 degree change. But that's right, PS needs to change this character for the good and future of Au Naturel.

As for chapter 9, it was the best so far, along with chapter 3. These two are very well written and cohesive so far. The big question is how to fit in this "Brandi" who seemed better prepared to face the exchange with other men and live the life of the natives than she is now. Sometimes, many authors lack more autonomy in their work, before chapter 10 it seems like one story and after it seems very different. The big question is when this orgy will happen. I imagine Kelly is the answer. Is she Dylan's girlfriend?? Stupid question, but I see it from this angle (Emily??)
 

_OBLIVION_

Engaged Member
Oct 3, 2021
2,086
6,297
636
I think I expressed myself poorly when I mentioned Brandi's 180 degree change. But that's right, PS needs to change this character for the good and future of Au Naturel.

As for chapter 9, it was the best so far, along with chapter 3. These two are very well written and cohesive so far. The big question is how to fit in this "Brandi" who seemed better prepared to face the exchange with other men and live the life of the natives than she is now. Sometimes, many authors lack more autonomy in their work, before chapter 10 it seems like one story and after it seems very different. The big question is when this orgy will happen. I imagine Kelly is the answer. Is she Dylan's girlfriend?? Stupid question, but I see it from this angle (Emily??)
I agree 100% on the first Paragraphe, PS needs to change her like she was in chapter 1 excited to have fun .

My favorite chapter is 3 I loved to see Brandi in the bed that was smoking hot and how Dylan convince her to give him a hj, chapter 9 is great too.

I think Brandi needs to see something very shocking in order to switch completely to the lifestyle of the island imo the perfect scenario would be her watching Kelly getting absolutely destroyed by Tom or The Monster, Dylan sees her masturbating and realize that hes being very selfish so he talks to her and give his blessing to do whatever she wants, Gina can help too.

I really think after the competition Kelly will beg for a cunnilingus by Dylan and then his cock inside her.

Definitely chapter 10 ruined and changed everything for the worst.

PD: Hey PS if you are here and like my thoughts feel free to take them and make them reality.
 
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5.00 star(s) 10 Votes