- Aug 27, 2020
- 2,296
- 4,534
Greetings folk of this forum.
I am something of a vampirephile and VtM subject matter expert.
I want to say it is good to have more stories out.
What I say next are opinions and in no way to be interpreted as attempts to tell a developer how to write their story!
I like the models for this story. They are not all original, but virtually none are these days. I particularly like the blonde in the bar, the stranger at the dance club, Zoey, and Julie. Story wise, and I mean not disrespect, I am hoping that the developer will take a more original path forward, but time will tell.
What do I mean?
The story seems cloned somewhat from other works, and while they say that duplicating work is the most sincere form of flattery, it can be problematic as well. I have high hopes that the author will find their own way forward, and make the story as uniquely their own as possible. This can be challenging given that all WoD based vampires and story types will share some baseline traits, but really what I mean is come up with some uniquely framed and formed characters for this story without simply changing genders on some pre existing characters that already exist in this genre of story, both here and on Steam.
That said, I did enjoy the blonde MILF from the bar, and her surprise. I did enjoy the club scene. The actual violence was quite well done. The Vampfu Mommy seems to be strikingly familiar in some ways to other previously produced work, but on the other hand, the dialogue there was quite good.
The Moot or Meet.
There was a distinct similarity to other works. The scene from VtMB1 comes to mind, with gender changes.
There was an enjoyable difference which was an anarchy to it, that a Prince would not allow, and the Arbiter possibly should not have allowed if she is the apex vampire of the city political scene. For instance she could have, after the first time the two clans ignored her, demand that they nominate a lamb, from their ranks. Then she could have made an example of them. Not necessarily fatal, but one that sends the message that they get their shit together or else. Her castle is supposed to be built on fear of her personally I guess, and so since that seems to not be in effect, she could have clearly placed all in context and have demonstrated it. That stark moment would have let the gravity of the MC's totally fucked situation, abundantly clear, and made the Zoey rescue even more meaningful.
I do like the choice mechanic, but again, time will tell if this really means much in the long run.
I have high hopes for this work, and while I rated it 3* I will be more than willing to revisit it later, if we see some more good stuff from the developer.
Peace
I am something of a vampirephile and VtM subject matter expert.
I want to say it is good to have more stories out.
What I say next are opinions and in no way to be interpreted as attempts to tell a developer how to write their story!
I like the models for this story. They are not all original, but virtually none are these days. I particularly like the blonde in the bar, the stranger at the dance club, Zoey, and Julie. Story wise, and I mean not disrespect, I am hoping that the developer will take a more original path forward, but time will tell.
What do I mean?
The story seems cloned somewhat from other works, and while they say that duplicating work is the most sincere form of flattery, it can be problematic as well. I have high hopes that the author will find their own way forward, and make the story as uniquely their own as possible. This can be challenging given that all WoD based vampires and story types will share some baseline traits, but really what I mean is come up with some uniquely framed and formed characters for this story without simply changing genders on some pre existing characters that already exist in this genre of story, both here and on Steam.
That said, I did enjoy the blonde MILF from the bar, and her surprise. I did enjoy the club scene. The actual violence was quite well done. The Vampfu Mommy seems to be strikingly familiar in some ways to other previously produced work, but on the other hand, the dialogue there was quite good.
The Moot or Meet.
There was a distinct similarity to other works. The scene from VtMB1 comes to mind, with gender changes.
There was an enjoyable difference which was an anarchy to it, that a Prince would not allow, and the Arbiter possibly should not have allowed if she is the apex vampire of the city political scene. For instance she could have, after the first time the two clans ignored her, demand that they nominate a lamb, from their ranks. Then she could have made an example of them. Not necessarily fatal, but one that sends the message that they get their shit together or else. Her castle is supposed to be built on fear of her personally I guess, and so since that seems to not be in effect, she could have clearly placed all in context and have demonstrated it. That stark moment would have let the gravity of the MC's totally fucked situation, abundantly clear, and made the Zoey rescue even more meaningful.
I do like the choice mechanic, but again, time will tell if this really means much in the long run.
I have high hopes for this work, and while I rated it 3* I will be more than willing to revisit it later, if we see some more good stuff from the developer.
Peace