It's a really difficult needle to thread when trying to establish your foundation so quickly. You were eager , for your own reasons, to show off your new baby and I can understand that.
You didn't allow yourself a lot of time to lay your foundation and it's the single most important step if what you intend to build is going to have weight to it. You have talent and the story has promise. Otherwise, I wouldn't be wasting your time or mine conversing on the subject. If what you are reading helps you perfect what you are creating, then we all benefit. Not everything you see posted and said is going to be "right answers" but, if any of it helps you find the flaws or inspires greater things, it's worth the effort. At least you are willing to look and think. Other devs double down out of insecurity or ego.
Bad parents, substance abusers and garbage humans are all characters most people have experienced in the real world. My parents were never drinkers but, too many people I have cared about did have "this Grace" as a parent. A few of those I had to step in and give them a new home because they simply accepted living with that hell as expected and normal. A new normal is what they deserved. I'm no white night. As a redhead, it's genetically not allowed (we were color coded for a reason) but, I wasn't going to just ignore something I could do something about.
I know, what's out is out, but maybe give some thought to adding more shades to Grace in the early parts as you continue. It will also give people another reason to play the intro again if it is revised in the future.
