17MOONKEYS
Thoughts if you're interested to hear them:
I like this so far. It doesn't take itself too seriously and knows not to linger on flaccid details. The simple or inelegant approaches to progressing the story are more charming in their simplicity than jarring or immersion breaking.
You're already on this path, but I like the idea of the commodified milk/cum having addictive qualities if not giving some other benefit that reinforces its value. Then taking that value and using it as the focus around domination one way or the other is explored. The pheromone angle is really good too. If you're following up on that, these are the areas that you can't afford to skim through. Giving appropriate emphasis to 'ownership' 'control' first of pleasure then in general and either 'relinquishing responsibilitiy' or 'gaining responsibility' and having one or two moments highlighting the value and importance of this path.
I particularly enjoyed the scene with aisha where the mc seemed somewhat aware of the wrestle for power and yet ended up sleeping with his head resting between her legs, satisfied in this environment.
It may be early still, but at some point explicit choices or hidden choices should give the player some agency on what happens to give the scenes a more compelling and enduring anchor. As it is, it feels just a little bit too arbitrary at the moment where most scenes come about not by consequence of choice, but of story progression. Having something like two attempts of asserting control where one fails and initiates a submissive route might be a silly or small gesture but it goes a long way to framing scenes with more impact. Conversely you could have two choices to submit where one attempt lowers the other person's guard and the other is just failure again. Though obviously this can be annoying to implement and may be something you're looking to add or retrofit after the main body of content is out.
Hopefully my thoughts don't come as criticism more than gentle challenges. Your story is interesting, your angles for scenes are good and the dialogue flow is inobtrusive and seems to adhere to some distinct internal consistency between characters. I also like as a personal choice that your scenes hinting dominance aren't over the top and still seem to hold some affection or warmth. I look forward to seeing what comes next regardless. Good luck!
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