VN Ren'Py Abandoned Writer's Block [v0.1] [Exels]

[finflash]

Hola! I usually steer away from the first versions but for some reason I decided to try this one so I'll give my two cents.

First of all, I liked renders, especially since girls looked realistic. Also, story is definitely interesting. I'm actually surprised that I read everything. Usually I get bored and just click it through.

The biggest negative for me was the lack of choices. And this is coming from the type of guy who doesn't picture himself in the game. And as someone mentioned, there were times when text walls were as large as the Great wall of China. And yeah, English could've been better but I'm seen way worse.

Lastly, remember that this is your game. Ignore those people who spam "Add girl on girl ntr or I won't play this!" Fuck them. This is your game and if someone doesn't like your story and content then fuck him.

 

[gippermand]

keep the good work

 

[Catwashere]

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this game might be abandoned!

 

[Maverick1965]

Started playing this one, but the writing was seriously over the place. I'm taking a punt and saying the English isn't your native language? If that's the case, nothing really much you can do about it, unless you grab someone else to help with the editing. That said, I'm sure your English is better than some native English speaker's own grammar.

Either way, the renders are nice and it's a refreshing change to see different girls in a VN.

Have to agree on the verbosity of the game though. Lots of sentences for very little impact. The internal 'story' with the detective is a cute idea, but overdone IMO.

As for the NTR component, after reading this thread, I'll steer clear of finishing this version. I get it's a vague thing at this stage, but, like some, definitely not my thing. Give it an option as avoidable and I'll play the next update as will many. Make it a 'thing' that isn't avoidable and you'll get those that get off on NTR following your game in droves, whilst everyone else will more than likely take a hard pass.