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February 23rd
MVP/HoF - 12pm EST
All Star - 2pm EST
Starter - 4pm EST
Sixth-Man - 6pm EST
Bench-Warmer - 8pm EST
Fan - 10pm EST
Former Patrons - 12am EST (02/24)
This date will not move again. Any further delays will result in pausing pledges until the update is released.
I'm not trying to play the victim here. I am the bad guy in this situation and I have a long way to go to prove I'm a dev worthy of the support he receives.
My actions have led to a lot of frustration and anger and I understand that and I agree that I have not done nearly enough to warrant the continued support.
It is not fair for me to keep giving out time frames and expectations and continuously failing to deliver on any of them.
My actions were not to trick or deceive.
But good intentions are far from enough. The reality is that I have not been a man of my word for a long time.
My goals were way too ambitious, I consistently found myself working from behind because I think I can achieve more than I can.
I hid behind becoming a husband and a father, I hid behind having to move multiple times, I hid behind the deaths of people I love, and I hid behind just about anything I could. I am not proud of this.
While these were all huge life events, I used them to excuse myself from the responsibility I hold as a developer who is actively taking pledges.
I appreciate everyone who has been holding me accountable.
I've put a ton of work into the game, a lot of work that you guys will never see because of how many times I've remade certain scenes. I used this fact to justify myself but things have gone on for way too long.
I'm just a young man trying to make the most fun game he can.
I've gone through a lot of changes in my life as of late and working on the game to distract myself or just to dump myself into has been a huge blessing but it's also been a curse.
While the update has no tie ins to my real life, I used working on the game to get away from real life for a bit. Things and feelings that are hard to say goodbye to.
On top of that I did a lot of new things and techniques for this update and I've second guessed myself every step of the way.
I have a responsibility to deliver something for you guys and I've routinely failed at doing so.
I may have gone through a lot and my life may have gone through many changes but none of it excuses me taking this long.
And just working on the game isn't enough. The work doesn't mean anything if it never gets seen.
I have to do better and I'm very sorry that it's taken me this long to see past myself.
My mental is pretty fucked. Being the bad guy isn't fun, I don't want to be this.
Having people I respect call me a scammer and milker, having people I've known for 3 years turn on me and ridicule me. Reading many comments everyday about how horrible of a person I am.
I'm scared of this update. I'm scared I took this much time to make something that isn't very good and that's the scariest fucking thing.
I've dealt with imposter syndrome for the entirety of making WVM and I've never felt it to this degree.
Trying to deliver something good quickly has really fucked me.
It sucks having so many people yell at you when you feel like you're trying to do the right thing but also agreeing with the criticism.
My brain has been pulling me in 80 different ways for a long fucking time and I feel pretty out of it from it.
I fully understand why everyone is so frustrated. It's one thing for me to need as much time as I have, but it's another when I constantly give expectations of a release soon only to then go behind on that.
It's reached a point where I have to just shut my brain off and let it be whatever it's going to be.
No more hiding, you guys deserve better.
I'm pretty ashamed of my recent past but there's no changing it now. I can only control the future and we have a plan.
I appreciate everyone who has stuck with me and I apologize for everyone I've lost. I never meant to deceive or trick anyone. I've urged anyone that didn't believe in the process I've been on to unpledge and so far they would have made the right decision.
Things from this moment will be different.
I've been through a lot and I decided to hide behind everything I could fit behind and I'm sorry for doing so. I'm too old for that now. Things have to and will change. I will grow and be better from all of this.
All I can do is ask for the opportunity to show that things can change. I'm only human.
I'll be around for our announcement post after the update and then Mackenzie will run the patreon and SS solo for a while as I focus on building momentum.
All I want to do is make a fun game, but I need to accept the responsibility I have.
Thank you for your time and I hope to see you around.
-Braindrop