2.80 star(s) 12 Votes

Deleted member 1571716

Conversation Conqueror
Aug 7, 2019
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Finally finished this. It has potential, but, it needs a bit of work. First off, there's no choices regarding anything. I mean, if this is a kinetic novel, it's fine. You will need to tag it with the kinetic novel tag if that's the case. But, you'll find that a lot of people don't like KNs. But, I can't answer for everyone on that. Just what I've seen on the forums. People want choices that matter and will want to choose who they interact with. Fetishes and kinks need to be optional. If not, then make sure you add them to the tags, that way people who don't like them can easily skip the game.

The English needs a bit of work. But, it's not too bad. Other than that, I'll keep my eye on this. Good luck, MDYetiLab
 

TFM

Member
Mar 7, 2019
272
204
Wait, do we know just how many comas he had in that year? Or did he forget every time he woke up?
 

MDYetiLab

Newbie
Game Developer
May 8, 2022
30
305
Finally finished this. It has potential, but, it needs a bit of work. First off, there's no choices regarding anything. I mean, if this is a kinetic novel, it's fine. You will need to tag it with the kinetic novel tag if that's the case. But, you'll find that a lot of people don't like KNs. But, I can't answer for everyone on that. Just what I've seen on the forums. People want choices that matter and will want to choose who they interact with. Fetishes and kinks need to be optional. If not, then make sure you add them to the tags, that way people who don't like them can easily skip the game.

The English needs a bit of work. But, it's not too bad. Other than that, I'll keep my eye on this. Good luck, MDYetiLab
Thanks for the encouragement. I know my English isn't great but I'm working on it.
Regarding the kinetic aspect, for the moment I've only put minor choices into the game but I plan to add some major choices in the next updates.
 

loikl

Well-Known Member
Feb 14, 2018
1,095
1,980
Sure, it doesn't seem like the most original plot, but what is it today? It looks good, it could work, but I would recommend taking care of the story, Beyond the fact that the MC was in a coma and woke up, why is he there? something a little beyond the sex itself, you know to keep the player interested in the story and that we are not a pointless fuckfest.

It looks good but the million dollar question is: Corruption or romance?

I don't see any of those tags (or in the future), so I leave the doubt in the air.

Good luck, I'll be on the lookout.(y)
 
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Deleted member 1571716

Conversation Conqueror
Aug 7, 2019
6,352
10,086
Sure, it doesn't seem like the most original plot, but what is it today? It looks good, it could work, but I would recommend taking care of the story, Beyond the fact that the MC was in a coma and woke up, why is he there? something a little beyond the sex itself, you know to keep the player interested in the story and that we are not a pointless fuckfest.

It looks good but the million dollar question is: Corruption or romance?

I don't see any of those tags (or in the future), so I leave the doubt in the air.

Good luck, I'll be on the lookout.(y)
So, if I understand you, you're saying that the MC shouldn't think he's awake and alive because he's the Gods gift to women and needs to spread his seed and have many children?

If that's what you're saying, then umm, shit...

3375fe34264f12854ff3fe305b75819d.gif
 
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loikl

Well-Known Member
Feb 14, 2018
1,095
1,980
So, if I understand you, you're saying that the MC shouldn't think he's awake and alive because he's the Gods gift to women and needs to spread his seed and have many children?

If that's what you're saying, then umm, shit...

View attachment 1807607
what?? Of course not, I think I was misunderstood, what I mean is that the MC should incinerate each girl in the game by turning her into your happy sex slave, the only thing I'm saying is that a story that starts and ends the game in a better way would be nice ... practice, but shit, OF COURSE the game must have tons of sex.
 

Jnx

Member
Jun 6, 2017
470
2,679
I already know where the story's going on top of poor english. This is gonna be a pass from me.
 

MDYetiLab

Newbie
Game Developer
May 8, 2022
30
305
I saw some comments about femdom and I can understand that's bothering some people. I will put an option to disable it.
The character of Miranda is important to my story and femdom is an important aspect of her personality, at least in the beginning until you will be able to reverse the roles.
 
2.80 star(s) 12 Votes