VN Ren'Py Abandoned Blue Action [v0.1] [Lonely Wolf]

[TiffanyMonroe]

The mc needs a haircut, growth spurt and testosterone shots.

 

[WiderWays]

For a second I thought it would be about an old man who needs to take Viagra. Anyways, models looking really good! Good luck!

 

[Poisonous]

RIP to my High Heels fetish

 

[Crowangel]

I'm sorry but this was terrible.. The MC is badly made and the 'ENGRISH' was painful to follow
I appreciate how hard it is to make a VN especially if english isnt your native language but before you release something you want people to like or even patreon you for, Then a simple request to get a proof reader to evaluate the dialogue you have written is a must..
The MC must be likeable if your going to ask someone to invest time and money into your project which by the way you forgot to change the name of in game as it still refers to it as RING OF LUST..
Take some time to work on these issues before you push forwards.. th music was ok but thats about the only positive i can give to this title sorry.. I will wait to see if anything is done about this before i leave a review because atm its going to be a 1 star

 

[YepperCause]

I appreciate how hard it is to make a VN especially if english isnt your native language but before you release something you want people to like or even patreon you for, Then a simple request to get a proof reader to evaluate the dialogue you have written is a must..

Dev didn't even skim the English language dialogue or he would have found the entire conversation in the middle of the chapter that is still in Spanish. This is genuinely inexcusable because there's currently zero branching so it would have required simply looking at the first word or two of every dialogue screen in succession, wouldn't take more than five minutes.

 

[AngelsAfterDark]

Females are all hot, but the translation is really poor, especially the chunk in the middle that just isn't translated from Spanish at all.

Also, the characters act like psychopaths to make the plot advance (MC hotdogs the friend's mom's ass and cums on her back during a lotion application, she notices and simply doesn't care, MC then wanders into the friend's dad's office for porn, despite literally having cum ten seconds ago, looks at his friend's dad's computer, begins reading his emails and finds out about major cash transfers that are the core of the mystery of the plot, I guess).

Finally, not sure how to say this, but...male MC looks young. Like, a lot younger than 19. All the females look age appropriate, to be clear.

was about to give this one a try, I'm glad I read this first. Sounds horrible.

 

[Crowangel]

Dev didn't even skim the English language dialogue or he would have found the entire conversation in the middle of the chapter that is still in Spanish. This is genuinely inexcusable because there's currently zero branching so it would have required simply looking at the first word or two of every dialogue screen in succession, wouldn't take more than five minutes.

I binned it before i even got that far.. and thats unlike me.. i usually give at least 1 full playthrough before making that choice

 

[Havik79]

Yeah just bad, bad story, bad grammar, calling the sister his, didn't make much sense, stupid shit like lifting a woman's dress and she didn't know or rubbing his cock on a woman's ass and then cumming on her back and she didn't know.

Definitely should have a shota tag.

 

[J0K3RXXX]

Promising.

 

[Richard Fappington]

 

[NakedSingularity]

Hm, will impregnation be an option for the incest characters in the future?

I'd hope so. Kinda dumb to have one but not the other. At least to me. If you are going to fuck them might as well breed them too (assuming they are fertile age). In for a penny, in for a pound as they say.

 

[EggsTyrone]

Now,that's correct text! View attachment 1937085

I just got to this part and i cannot stop laughing

 

[Yarakmaster]

is that L-L-L-Leanbeefpatty?

 

[Misutero]

"If you guys are going to be here, try not to cough too much, yes".

 

[Daastaan007]

The MC look like a 13/14 years kiddo.
[Also acting like shit]

And, replace "he" & "his" with "she" & "her"

 

[kwazi]

 

[kwazi]

all the sudden it switches to i think thats Spanish wen mc talking to lily

 

[WildBillKatt]

He absolutely doesn't look like an adult. I think there are forum rules against me stating how old I think he looks, but he doesn't look a thing like any guy I ever knew who was 19...or, frankly, even any guy I went to high school with.

The 2 pics in the OP look adequate to be 18 or over. Maybe if I download it I'll feel differently, but this is not "Gordon". I'll wait to see if a 0.2 comes out before I do that, though.

 

[Saint Blackmoor]

If you're an English player, consider starting a business translating / editing porn games. That seems to be a huge chunk of what's killing the ratings of most games these days.

I got this from your review.

URMfollower22

You are totally right. I've tried doing a few translations, Russian to English and Asian to English. It's very hard. The problem is Devs don't or can't pay enough to make it worth it. Plus, the dev has to trust that you conveyed their original plot.
I think AI is going to be used in the future for this.

 

[No_Name_Dude420]

Fron what I'm seeing, I doubt this will ever be ported to andriod.