All that south american silver did eventually render silver basically worthless in Europe for a bit though
Others Corruption of Champions II [v0.7.31] [Savin/Salamander Studios]
- Thread starter TheImage
- Start date
-
- Tags
- 2dcg adventure ahegao anal sex bdsm big ass big tits character creation corruption dilf fantasy female domination female protagonist furry futa/trans futa/trans protagonist gay groping group sex handjob humor lactation lesbian male domination male protagonist masturbation milf mobile game monster girl multiple endings multiple penetration netorare oral sex paranormal pregnancy religion romance sissification teasing tentacles text based titfuck transformation trap turn based combat vaginal sex virgin voyeurism
Did.... did anyone proofread this shit?https://f95zone.to/threads/corrupti...-savin-salamander-studios.11371/post-10741813
It's in the spoiler with multiple examples taken out of the game. There'd have to be some very loose interpretations on err... Things mentioned.
I can't remember of the two (Savin/Tobs) who even wrote this nonsense. And it's not like it matters all that much.
Regarding Cait I'm sure there's going to be somebody that gets a chuckle
Long as you sidestep that she's advocating doing in the Alraune.
Anyways Cait remains as abrasive and generally unlikable to me for the same reasons you don't ask your best friend intimate questions about his love life.
On another note I've read that Kohaku preg is never going to happen because Tobs said it would get in the way of her being a merchant.
I don't know if it's just me but the kitsune world-building feels so weird. The lore is randomly explained to us and their rules feel like they are made up on the spot just to fuck with the player.
I don't know if it's just me but the kitsune world-building feels so weird. The lore is randomly explained to us and their rules feel like they are made up on the spot just to fuck with the player.
Because they are. Kekw.
Bro, it's Tobs lol. He's a salt miner through and through, of course he gonna do that to fuck with the player. By the by, here's my first draft of the champ fucking Nakano. I'm open for feedback so pls drown me in them.
You must be registered to see the links
Despite this content not really being for me. I really liked it! how long did this take to write?
Now there are some grammar mistakes that need to be fixed to make it better to read but I won't harp on that too much because I would make the same mistakes lol.
Good work and keep it up!
- Nov 27, 2017
- 1,197
- 1,392
Not bad! Could use a fem-champ variation imo but in terms of actual writing, I liked it. The formatting was a little weird, though. You indented with a dash for some reason on every line that started with dialogue, but then you kept the whole paragraph indented. It would be better to indent only the first line of each new paragraph/dialogue. Unless there's a reason behind it that I'm not seeing, which there very well could be.
Edit: replied to the wrong post at first
As testament to Savin's laziness submissions of "trusted" writers like Tobs don't get proofread. In other words even Savin ain't going to drown in that word salad.
Tobs can't perceive a woman having a career and a family.
Very solid first draft, needs a bit of a spellcheck go over because I spotted a few errors but the premise and tone are good.
Add in a few feminization or outright tg options later down the line and this will be a great route
- Nov 2, 2017
- 2,896
- 7,646
Tobs can't perceive a woman
- Nov 27, 2017
- 1,197
- 1,392
Tobs can't perceive
Tobs can't
Tobs
I think y'all mean Tobs can't observe...
Yeah I'll let myself out.
Yeah I'll let myself out.
He can't observe his writing to let himself know that he needs to understand his word to tell you how much he spites everyone for Kinu's father and daughter's relationship.
sooo i cant get the normal app to work but i did get it to work by running it like it said to do for mac PCs soooo whatever
- Nov 27, 2017
- 1,197
- 1,392
Fair enough. Depending on style/type of writing, formatting can differ. And, of course, everyone has their own style that they find easy to follow. Personally, I use double line-breaks and a play script style of formatting for dialogue. If you want an example, I've spoilered a small excerpt from some of my latest writing for Masters of Raana. (Not a sex scene, but the formatting is the same)
The double line breaks help to break up the text and make it more easily digestible, so readers aren't intimidated by a wall of text. Dialogue is more of a personal preference. The way you do it is closer to how a book does it, with a line break and indent each time there's a new speaker, but also allowing for narration to follow dialogue without a line break. That's fine, but like I mentioned earlier, indenting the entire paragraph the way you did makes it more condensed and harder for the average reader to digest.
You do make use of double line breaks in your text, but not consistently and not to separate narration from dialogue, which makes for really big walls of text. You also don't use quotation marks all the time, which makes it really hard to tell where dialogue stops and narration begins since, like already mentioned, you allow dialogue to flow into narration without a line break.
I'm by no means an expert, feel free to disregard everything I've said, but hopefully some of that helps!
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content.
Log in or register now.
Last edited: