Man... Idk what to tell you- but the writing in this game is ass. It's not even an issue of english not being a first language or something.. you're explaining your jokes(like the instance of MC talking to Tom about bob x meya's scene).. It all runs together like you're just writing whatever pops in your head at any given time without seeing the script as a whole..
The game is unoptimized as all hell- with full resimages to create the animation. causing every 1 second loop to be about 50mbs in size. And the game is full of bugs. Such as even investigating the flame in the labyrinth part that brings up a dial for the patreon code-getting it wrong just breaks the game.- and other similar patreon bonus things(which you can't tell is for that until you interact with it)- It would be a little better if anything was custom made but you're just using default illusion assets and even detail ingame that meya has green hair when it's very clearly not green or even close in actuality. Your writing comes off more as a guide than actual internal dialogue and it is just too much.
I can applaud the concept being largely untapped for an NTR game- It's basically Fujinos SAO concept just presented far worse. I don't review games that are not complete but this game needs a lot of polish.