- Thread starter johnytherocket
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- Sep 15, 2019
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Quite promising. Tell me, will the project continue to develop as a game (with choices and all that) or just as a short story (a linear story with no choices)?
- May 2, 2018
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Great question. Initially I planned to make it more of a short story with several different endings in the finale. After community feedback I may include some choices in the middle to avoid the more 'extreme' kinks. I am not 100% sure whether or not I will include choices in the future, choices of course would make the game/novel way better but at the same time that would more double the renders which means the updates would come much slower. Although if it can be done well and efficiently I am open to adding choices later in the novel perhaps after a few more characters are introduced. I am open to the community's ideas, if anyone has any way to make impactful choices (in my opinion unimpactful choices are just a waste of time) that wouldn't require a shit ton of more rendering and animating I am all ears.
I just like to translate games into Russian with like-minded people, and I understand from people's reviews that players like not just to read a beautiful story, but to take part in it: go there or to another place, talk to one character or another, and so on. In General, make a choice. I think with elements of choice, with options for development, your story will become much more interesting.
- Feb 4, 2018
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- May 2, 2018
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Thanks! Aiming for mid September for 0.2 which will feature the 5th day, at the current time things are mostly going well in terms of scheduling and content that is already done.
- Jul 27, 2017
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English being your native language doesn't automatically make you a good writer though. The dialogue in this game turned me off so hard that I couldn't even make it to the first sex scene.johnytherocket said:
The excessive use of textspeak, outdated slang and catchphrases makes it feel like you're listening to a couple of 14 year olds from 2010 texting instead of adults having a conversation.
It would be one thing if there was one character who talked that way and it was just part of the way they are, but every fucking character uses words like ain't, lol, bruh, lit unironically and it's incredibly cringe-worthy.
- May 2, 2018
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It was already pointed out that there is too much slang, and I agree for the most part. Although it seems that you are implying that adults don't use slang or "ain't" in everyday conversion. Colloquialism in writing is nothing new, Shakespeare was known for having slang, as well as novels like A clockwork orange. I do believe culture plays into this too, even English speaking countries like Canada, US, Australia, and UK all have different amounts of slang in general conversations. Age of course is a big factor too, younger kids tend to use more slang than older people. Almost all the slang in the vn is attributed to the two youngest introduced characters, the older characters have considerably less. I'll cut the slang down for the next day and see how people react to it. Also what's your thoughts on slang for the protagonist's thoughts, do you think that is fine or personally do you think it should be more formal?
- Jul 27, 2017
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Slang in itself isn't a problem, but if you use slang in your writing you better make sure it fits the character's background and that you don't overuse it, otherwise it sticks out like a sore thumb. The amount of excessive slang you get assaulted by in the first five minutes of this game is the equivalent of Homer Simpson's make-up shotgun. You also barely use punctuation. It gives off the impression that you shat out the writing in ten minutes as an afterthought, which is a shame since your renders are quite good. Maybe some people don't care, but there is nothing that makes me put down a game quicker than sloppy writing and bad dialogue.
agreed also ball squeezing and pulling.How about forced orgasm / multiple orgasm + Post orgasm torture (might fall under cbt). A personal favorite of mine
Regarding the thing discussed earlier on what should be avoidable, I will just give my humble opinion: the dev obviously has their own vision and we shouldn't be forcing any decisions on them, but let me just say: making the most extreme fetishes avoidable (and I do mean avoidable, not skippable) would just be... a smart business decision. I think most will agree with me on that.
Looking forward to see where this goes, not a huge fan of visual novels but as long as we do get some choices, I'm in!
Looking forward to see where this goes, not a huge fan of visual novels but as long as we do get some choices, I'm in!
- May 2, 2018
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Definitely Amy, she is a sadist so stuff like spanking, cbt, whipping, caning, choking etc. are gonna fall mostly under her category. There's already an over the knee spanking scene with her in the current version (v0.1).
Cool! Will there be more spanking that she will be doing? haha