- Jul 7, 2021
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Honestly, it's like the dev read a Raymond Chandler novel, got deployed overseas to Japan, developed a drinking problem, and forgot how to write correctly in English. It would explain everything... Or, you know, someone left the project. The MC instantly transforms from a lovable and relatable goof who happens to be a recently injured police officer--to a hard-boiled, hard-drinking, slang-using, sarcasm-wielding Son of a Rick Flair. Oh, and we're suddenly in Japan. Oh, and the pacing goes out the window. Oh, and we'll leave behind all the carefully introduced characters and now spend an hour introducing two unlikeable and poorly designed literal prostitutes. These aren't whores with a heart of gold. Nope, they're more of the push-my-daughter's-head-down-on-a-strange-man's-penis type whores. Sorry... WHAT!?Exactly. Let alone someone who very obviously has mental issues to the point the department knows about it. They'd slap a stamp on his head and ship him the fuck somewhere else. It's so damn jarring. The prologue was perfect and now it's like the Dev goes "hey, here some mad world building I'm putting in cause I like weeb shit ok? Peace out"
You probably think that you are the most intelligent super smart being in the entire universe (which I am certain almost no one agrees) but before you could even offer any kind of service, would you mind first disclose your qualifications like the award-winning games, movies, scripts, screenplays, novels, books, arts, literatures or others that you have produced? Your prospect employer/hirer would love that kind of information, but I would also like to know just so that I know what to avoid.Honestly, it's like the dev read a Raymond Chandler novel, got deployed overseas to Japan, developed a drinking problem, and forgot how to write correctly in English. It would explain everything... Or, you know, someone left the project. The MC instantly transforms from a lovable and relatable goof who happens to be a recently injured police officer--to a hard-boiled, hard-drinking, slang-using, sarcasm-wielding Son of a Rick Flair. Oh, and we're suddenly in Japan. Oh, and the pacing goes out the window. Oh, and we'll leave behind all the carefully introduced characters and now spend an hour introducing two unlikeable and poorly designed literal prostitutes. These aren't whores with a heart of gold. Nope, they're more of the push-my-daughter's-head-down-on-a-strange-man's-penis type whores. Sorry... WHAT!?
There is absolutely no way these are the same people working on this project, LOL. We had a few months' break, fell far off the initially reported timeline, and now we have this dumpster-fire. It is absolutely, glaringly obvious that someone who had been working on the project or helping somehow has left. There is no way this is the same group of people. Something has changed.
TO THE DEV: If your writer/editor/translator/collaborator has left the project and won't come back, that's a shame. For a % of the proceeds, I could probably be convinced to help rewrite the entire script for this last update into something that makes sense and matches the tone and pace of the beginning. You wouldn't have to change a single render, just change the order of the images and the words beneath them.
And if you want to move the story into a more hard-boiled direction, we can do that gradually in a way that makes sense. This project had so much potential. We can draw up a contract on Upwork or something. Ball's in your court dev.
I think he wrote 'Two Testes No Dong' and the most famous 'Mr. Tiny PP'.You probably think that you are the most intelligent super smart being in the entire universe (which I am certain almost no one agrees) but before you could even offer any kind of service, would you mind first disclose your qualifications like the award-winning games, movies, scripts, screenplays, novels, books, arts, literatures or others that you have produced? Your prospect employer/hirer would love that kind of information, but I would also like to know just so that I know what to avoid.
well you have my respectBro I want to cry while fapping, let me alone!
You probably think that you are the most intelligent super smart being in the entire universe (which I am certain almost no one agrees) but before you could even offer any kind of service, would you mind first disclose your qualifications like the award-winning games, movies, scripts, screenplays, novels, books, arts, literatures or others that you have produced? Your prospect employer/hirer would love that kind of information, but I would also like to know just so that I know what to avoid.
Fair enough . I've only played up to mid of Chapter 1, had not experienced such a sharp (contrast) decline in quality (both writing or game content) yet, I'll find out soon enough. Anyway, it is just generally a good idea to have some kind of established 'expertise' in an area where we would like to offer some type of service for a fee or even pro bono, but I do understand the need of being anonymous. In that case, just contact the developer (or the team) with relevant information. It is just a 'red flag' (to me) so to speak when someone anonymous (or stranger) made a (sort of) bold claim about something, which I generally try to stay away from. Cheers.Lol, I'm not going to dox myself. But I do write and edit professionally. If you want to die on this hill, be my guest. I was a huge fan of the prologue; I believe if it was abandoned at that point, then it would have been one of the best games on the site. As I re-read my last post, I will concede that I sounded like a complete cunt. Long day. I'll leave my post up, however, because I stand behind the content of what I said... even if the tone is pompous.
In my professional writing and editing, I rarely get to do anything as creative as that which I offered to do above. Having said that, I think anyone with a coherent and native grasp of English could probably improve upon what was written. And to steal one of your points from you to make my own, it's a lot easier to REwrite something than to write something from scratch. The ideas are all there, it's just an execution issue.
I'm not a keyboard warrior, and I fully concede to having sounded like a douche. But I was being sincere. And I don't think I was wrong. There is a huge drop off in quality, probably the worst I have ever seen in a game update. I can't even think of a good counterexample. Can you? Maybe the project isn't reeling. Maybe it's a flukey thing. Or maybe my tastes are just pretentious and the author/dev is no longer interested in keeping someone like me engaged. Maybe... But I think it's more likely that someone important left the project and the dev is doing their best as a nonnative speaker and inexperienced writer to pick up the slack.
Na, that's unlikely. From looking at the numbers, the dev's actually getting steady progress in terms of patreon numbers. He's actually doing well compared to other most established developers and the stuff he has done, despite it being a bit... peculiar in places, is well done. A few solid updates to help the patron numbers along and he could be earning bank.alright ima call it now lol this game is going to get abandoned in 2 updates
If I weren't busy on other projects (aka a lazy bastard), I would definitely reach out. Brace yourself btw. This goes from being arguably the best game on the site to a complete mess. And it happens like a light switch.Fair enough . I've only played up to mid of Chapter 1, had not experienced such a sharp (contrast) decline in quality (both writing or game content) yet, I'll find out soon enough. Anyway, it is just generally a good idea to have some kind of established 'expertise' in an area where we would like to offer some type of service for a fee or even pro bono, but I do understand the need of being anonymous. In that case, just contact the developer (or the team) with relevant information. It is just a 'red flag' (to me) so to speak when someone anonymous (or stranger) made a (sort of) bold claim about something, which I generally try to stay away from. Cheers.
Damn its gonna be smaller updates from now on, guess I gotta start skipping a bunch, let them all build upYou don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Should say that in the overview or at the start of the game. For instance in the train, a few lines between the MC and his daughter saying they're going back to Tokyo or whatever.The game was always based and contemplated to be made under a perspective of a fictional Japan, as that is the reality that is more familiar to me. Although there are some western references or attitudes to make it more international, it is not at all made as if it were a documentary or a portrait of Japanese society and architecture.
i mean the fictional japan thing is something i can buy, something like tokyo/san francisco from big hero 6. it's not a big deal tbhThe dev seems to be from japan or at least living there the theme of the setting makes sense, and as for the characters well it doesn't make much sense but if he made them Japanese I think it wasn't going to be a very mainstream game tbf
Yeah, it sounds like sloppy damage control to say that thing people are criticizing was always meant to be that way.Japan according to OP
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It makes sense that, that's the odd thing. From what I've seen on his patreon, he's from Japan so it is understandable he'd stick to what he is familiar with....... but why go to all the hassle of learning renpy and DAZ and everything else to make a game you're hoping will mean you can quit your job to work on full time and then populate it with characters who very obviously aren't from where you're setting the game. It's like setting a game in Siberia and filling it with BAME characters. Not to see there aren't people in Siberia from different parts of the world, but the percentage will be so low to make it look like there's a very specific reason for it. Especially since the location doesn't play any part in the story. The Dev could have set the game on the island of Namesarehard on the Content Idontgiveafuck and literally everything else would have been fine. White dude as a policeman in a city with a Japanese sounding name with Japanese gangsters? Sure why not. But by drawing attention to a specific place the player would understand, it's left them thinking what the rationale for it is, and it makes people think it's absurd as a result. And I don't mean "absurd, but it's a porn game so allowances need to be made" way. I'm talking absurd in the "huh John Wayne is playing Ghengis Khan" kind of way.Yeah, it sounds like sloppy damage control to say that thing people are criticizing was always meant to be that way.