VN Ren'Py Abandoned Inevitable Relations [v0.1b] [KinneyX23]

[KinneyX23]

Based on V0.3a
I read and understood this your 1st attempt so please accept these comments as constructive. Some are my opinion some are cock-ups/typos. Overall, I think you've got off to a great start and looking forward to more. I like the different POV, I personally think there needs to be more female protagonists.

Thank you for your kind words. I'm aware that there still are some flaws, but I sincerely hope, that I can correct them in the near future.

Now on with the waffling -
Intro - the red on the orange clashes making it difficult to read in places

It was a special intro for the holiday season and it will be gone in the next version. But to be honest, I forgot to remove this intro. ^^

<rant> My number 1 issue - after sending him away for what he did with Eva there is no way on Earth, ever, unless the the mother was one truly warped individual or so thick as to be a dangerous parent would she go anywhere near the 1st option. To make that sort of comment you would need such a strong relationship with your child and know fully his response would be the classic kid thinking of parent sex - "Ewww Mum!!!" </end rant>

I know this seems weird right now, but it will lead to another event.

1st flashback - Alex is in the pictures, Bethany is talking.

It's already fixed for the next version.

Bethany love how she is a fuller figure without being overly exaggerated unlike the massive boobs and bum like on some motherly figures. So often in media in general same sex is portrayed as binary and nothing more, "how could he marry her and have a child knowing he had feelings for him?" so, I love how through the thread you have been reinforcing her being bi-sexual rather than binary one way or the other.

Thanks. I said it numerous times, I simply don't like the way a lot of games follow these typical sterotypes. For example a woman needs to be a supermodel like creature, with no flaws and she has to behave a certain way. Sometimes, they don't even have a brain and can't make decisions of their own, they have to be a brainless piee of meat, so that the MC can trick them into doing whatever (for the most part) he wants.

That's basically why I chose the female perspective and more importantly making my main character the way she is.

1st meeting with Cpt Barrett the cars change during the close ups in the conversation from the distance view just before.

Yup noticed that too.

Shower scene TBinc...couldn't you reuse the morning pictures or is there more text needed or is it....with Alex :heartcoveredeyes: or is it the lead into the Eva opening scene? To me, that came a little out of the blue.

There is something that will be different than the first scene. But as of now I couldn't figure out how I would do it. I know roughly what I want to do with the scene, but I'm not sure how to do the evening scene.

To me, Eva looks a lot younger than 21 (closer to 16). Please don't ask what could help, I can't put my finger on it. And no I don't think bigger boobs would automatically help, maybe just keeping an eye on what she wears could do it. Sorry this is one of the real intangibles when you get girls of 14 looking mid-20's when dressed up and mid-30's looking like high school girls (Stockard Channing - Grease )

I'm not sure, why you think so. Everyone I asked so far said, that she looks like she's in her early twenties. Then again she is supposed to look young, but she won't get bigger boobs!

Typo in the shopping scene - shows should be shoes.

Whoops!

Too late I know but:
Alex's hair - the vote closed but I was going to try for the Alternate Version of Alex
Bethany's hair - she could wear it up at work and other ways in her own time.

Good idea. I actually have the perfect asset to do that already.



And again thanks for your input!

 

[kiteares]

Thank you for your kind words. I'm aware that there still are some flaws, but I sincerely hope, that I can correct them in the near future.
<snip>

Which is what trying and taking feedback is all about.

I know this seems weird right now, but it will lead to another event.
<snip>

A bit like the shower, I did wonder, but I did struggle to square it off in my head. I look forward to seeing how it turns out.

I'm not sure, why you think so. Everyone I asked so far said, that she looks like she's in her early twenties.

Eye of the beholder, I'll have to go and inspect her more thoroughly
I think when we see more of her personality her age should come through more also.

Then again she is supposed to look young, but she won't get bigger boobs! <snip>

THANK YOU!! It's the last thing I would have wanted. I known plenty of women over my years that have been little more than an A cup.

And again thanks for your input!

More than happy to try and help in my little way.

 

[Toxx666]

Will try mom protagonist.. :HeyGuys:

 

[Toxx666]

Mom's!! hot!! :eazyHype:

 

[Del.Mar]

Any news for update?

 

[KinneyX23]

I should have the next update ready within the next few days.
But be aware, that two seperate games will be released, one is the main game, with the new content and the other will be a prologue to the main game, where Beth (the main character) is 16. The main game will include a few new scenes one of which is Evas birthday.

As for the prologue, you probably guessed it, but there won't be any nude or sex scenes with Beth!

 

[xןʞ]

Tomato pillows have been confirmed though.

 

[Bellyk Franck]

Vs 0.0.4 on SVS!

 

[KinneyX23]

Great. ^^

Kind of funny, that they always have access to any game.

 

[Alexander Krisnov]

Updated to ver 0.04

 

[hydro13]

why is there no mega link for uncompressed?

 

[myuhinny]

@

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It's probably because the mega link is in the process of being updated.

*Edit just checked again and the link has been updated for the PC version.

 

[KinneyX23]

Couldn't look at the OP with all those old preview pictures.
I added the Mega link in the process.

 

[Fenix34]

I should have the next update ready within the next few days.
But be aware, that two seperate games will be released, one is the main game, with the new content and the other will be a prologue to the main game, where Beth (the main character) is 16. The main game will include a few new scenes one of which is Evas birthday.

As for the prologue, you probably guessed it, but there won't be any nude or sex scenes with Beth!

lame : P

 

[KinneyX23]

You want to have nude and sex scenes in a game with a 16 year old? :O

Kidding ofc. The prologue is a seperate game yes, but it's also the new beginning for the main game. I just amde a seperate version for those of you who don't want to start over.

 

[kare]

I was caught cheating lol.

 

[StaticSheep]

Changelog - v0.04
* Complete redesign of Evas room and with that the wakeup scene before shopping is changed as well

* New variable for eva added (eva_discomfort)

A new variable!!! Sweet:eazyHype:

 

[LP83]

Mom's HOT and can't wait for some Mom-Daughter loving

 

[myuhinny]

@

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Noticed a bug in the shower scene.

Spoiler

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[Dustellar]

The game still have incest? (I have the feeling that this will be a recurring question)