VN Ren'Py Abandoned REBEL [v0.2] [Makunight]

[merin_aspic]

I´m spaniard and even the spanish used in the game is a little bit confusing, with 30-40 aged person talking like teenagers writing in whatsapp ("Eyyyyyy, hermanitoooooo, qué pasaaaaaaaa") LOL.

 

[Night Silis]

I´m spaniard and even the spanish used in the game is a little bit confusing, with 30-40 aged person talking like teenagers writing in whatsapp ("Eyyyyyy, hermanitoooooo, qué pasaaaaaaaa") LOL.

Yes, in that there is confusion talking with a friend from Latin America, expressions change. Where I am from is used a lot, in affectionate terms, regardless of age.

 

[Fappable One]

Hello I am the creator of this game, I don't know how it was published here so quickly, I had planned to come and bring it myself, we were fixing the game to improve the English but it seems that we were overtaken, forgive if there are errors, because my intention was to finish improving it first, well send me the feedback or any questions.

Ok. I'll bite
First you have to get rid of the elephant in the room. It's wrecking havoc at a chaotic rate. Whatever translation you're using, it's obviously not working very well on the English side of things. You need to find a translation site that also deals with grammar. Try this one:

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Then there's the sex scenes. I understand your reasoning why it's set up like this, but you still should've thrown us a bone. There's patience , and there's patience . Don't be the latter. What you should've done is make a Dream Sequence or a Fantasy Sequence sex scene.

There's a lot of things I like with this game. Has the potential to be a gem. Just got to take care of that pesky elephant. Cheers

 

[House Of Black]

The only thing holding you back is the grammar

 

[spooge_nugget]

This is essentially just a very short introduction/teaser. Hopefully future updates won't be as short as this and will have more substance.

 

[cuthbert_binns]

May I ask for adding default characters name. Its a bit annoying search new set of names everytime new game is released.

There actually are default names in the script, they just don't get set correctly if you leave the input blank. See for yourself in game/script.rpy lines 4-11. But I agree with you, it would be great if they are used automatically from the next release onwards.

 

[Night Silis]

There actually are default names in the script, they just don't get set correctly if you leave the input blank. See for yourself in game/script.rpy lines 4-11. But I agree with you, it would be great if they are used automatically from the next release onwards.

The next version will have better optimization

 

[215303j]

Didn't want to write a formal review yet because I think it's unfair, but I'll just give my opinion of the game so far.
Version 0.1 "leaked edition"

Pro's:
- Premise, good father-daughter games are relatively rare
- Daughter personality, I like the rebellious type and that she's trying to get her dad come out of his shell
- Daughter model, she looks really good and her looks seem to fit her personality
- Sister model, looks good but also looks her age in a non-standard way, and that's not so easy to achieve

Con's:
- Father model, he looks like a mid-20's supermodel/athlete rather than a 40-something writer, it's not realistic
- Spelling/grammar, obviously (but the dev is clear and open enough about that, it will improve)
- The story itself (not the spelling): it seems way too easy. The daughter seems too willing, as is the sister. The MC seems reluctant, but the player controls the MC so at this rate he'll fuck the sister in the next update, the daughter in v0.3 and the niece in v0.4 without any problems. You need to find a way to make the story interesting. The rebellious daughter could, for example, hang around with bad boyfriends and you need to rescue her before she does something stupid like fucking them. Or she's getting into doing drugs, or something. But as it is, the rebellious side seems more like fun-loving and seems not really negative so far.

Total verdict: 2 out of 5.
It would be 3 if the spelling/grammar is cleaned up but for more the story simply needs to improve.

 

[Night Silis]

Didn't want to write a formal review yet because I think it's unfair, but I'll just give my opinion of the game so far.
Version 0.1 "leaked edition"

Pro's:
- Premise, good father-daughter games are relatively rare
- Daughter personality, I like the rebellious type and that she's trying to get her dad come out of his shell
- Daughter model, she looks really good and her looks seem to fit her personality
- Sister model, looks good but also looks her age in a non-standard way, and that's not so easy to achieve

Con's:
- Father model, he looks like a mid-20's supermodel/athlete rather than a 40-something writer, it's not realistic
- Spelling/grammar, obviously (but the dev is clear and open enough about that, it will improve)
- The story itself (not the spelling): it seems way too easy. The daughter seems too willing, as is the sister. The MC seems reluctant, but the player controls the MC so at this rate he'll fuck the sister in the next update, the daughter in v0.3 and the niece in v0.4 without any problems. You need to find a way to make the story interesting. The rebellious daughter could, for example, hang around with bad boyfriends and you need to rescue her before she does something stupid like fucking them. Or she's getting into doing drugs, or something. But as it is, the rebellious side seems more like fun-loving and seems not really negative so far.

Total verdict: 2 out of 5.
It would be 3 if the spelling/grammar is cleaned up but for more the story simply needs to improve.

I thank you very much for your criticism, your understanding and how you list the good and the bad point by point, and I assure you that it will help me improve the game. Thank you very much.

 

[TheActualOne]

Looking good!

 

[Mormont]

I liked it, of course with it being V0-1 there is still room for improvement and I believe will get better over time the daughter is the main appeal so far she's cute.

 

[Night Silis]

Android version pls

here you have the version for android.

You must be registered to see the links

 

[Mladin]

GOOOD STORY

 

[OGSage]

Not bad so far

 

[paqueteman]

is this only three choices??

 

[Night Silis]

is this only three choices??

what do you need?

 

[paqueteman]

what do you need?

after third choices i always go to sleep, no matter what i choose. idk if it's the whole game or im just failing

 

[Night Silis]

after third choices i always go to sleep, no matter what i choose. idk if it's the whole game or im just failing

the elections that she does not like makes it end yes, it is the presentation of the game and it is not much content, the next update will be longer ... but look at the elections the other routes.
Please forgive my english.

 

[Ghostredneck]

Enjoyed it, Keep up the great work will be watching!

 

[tazlucky09]

yup

works grate
u put it in the wrong place it dont go into the "game" folder

put it in the "english" folder. REBEL => game => tl => english