VN Ren'Py Completed Something to Write About: The Author [Ch. 7.1] [STWAdev]

[AL.d]

I don't know how I missed this one. Pretty renders, decent writing and a nice cast. A promising game for sure.

Just a few personal observations from playing the first three chapters, since dev seems to be active here. As always my personal opinion, nothing more.

a) It's obvious the MC in this is presented as a successful dude with many willing romantic interests orbiting him. Just don't go and add a gazillion more characters ready and willing to enter the harem. Other games do that and it always results in an army of mindless drones with no personality. Instead focus on developing what is already there.

b) Don't overdo it with the constant witty banter. It adds personality to interactions when used in moderation but too much of it and everyone ends up reading as the same person.

c) Don't be afraid of polarizing (AKA bitchy or antagonistic) characters. Having players talk about them, means they are interesting. They add drama to a story. And despite the negative connotation of the word, a story without drama is, by definition, a story where nothing is happening. Of course there should be options on how to deal with said characters.

d) For the love of everything holy change Christine's hair back to the flashback one. The new one ages her about 40 years.

 

[Avaron1974]

Just don't go and add a gazillion more characters ready and willing to enter the harem.

To be fair there are only potentially 3 people in the harem route.

Aiofe and Lyndie come as a pair in the poly or on their own solo routes and potentially have B along for the ride or solo. The others are all solo.

 

[Osamabeenfappin]

So, as an interesting source of potential future conflict, how likely is it that Aoife's mom got MC fired for not playing softball with her daughter's grades? Fairly sure it would completely be water under the bridge between them at this point, but it would set up a future confrontation with Aoife's mom for some interesting drama.

That's what I was thinking as well. Feel like Aoifes mom is gonna be super pissed when MC escorts her to that Thanksgiving party.

 

[Avaron1974]

That's what I was thinking as well. Feel like Aoifes mom is gonna be super pissed when MC escorts her to that Thanksgiving party.

Not sure.

Aiofe's mother hates people that suck up to her, he didn't. Not sure she'll hate him all that much. Probably won't like him but I don't think she'd like anyone Aiofe brought.

 

[STWAdev]

a) It's obvious the MC in this is presented as a successful dude with many willing romantic interests orbiting him. Just don't go and add a gazillion more characters ready and willing to enter the harem. Other games do that and it always results in an army of mindless drones with no personality. Instead focus on developing what is already there.

On that front you don't have to worry, aside from one more potential LI I don't have any interest in adding a billion girls, not only for character consistency but also because honestly think I might go crazy trying to keep track.

 

[The ArcKnight]

Needs the interracial tag among others. Cheers.

 

[Glooskabe]

Needs the interracial tag among others. Cheers.

I added Interracial and Vaginal Sex tags. Any others? Does anybody think Lyndie's solo scene consitutes Cosplay?

 

[bcrr]

Not sure.

Aiofe's mother hates people that suck up to her, he didn't. Not sure she'll hate him all that much. Probably won't like him but I don't think she'd like anyone Aiofe brought.

Yeah, I feel like we're gonna have to wait til we actually meet her to get a real read on the situation. The whole 'she doesn't like bootlickers' thing feels very at odds with 'bought an entire private school bc a teacher gave Aoife a bad grade'. There's something a bit more complex going on with her than just spoiled rich girl who grew up to run Hollywood.

With the whole 'disappeared as a teenager and then reappeared to take over Hollywood' thing, it's not exactly a huge leap to guess that's when Aoife was born, and I'm sure there's a pretty nuanced backstory in there somewhere.

 

[ThunderRob]

good writing..great dames..Team-Lyndie all the way...my only concern is...even though i turn down Aoife's advances whenever possible in an effort to be just Lyndie..it still feels like..at some point..ima gonna be harem'd to be fair..i enjoy a good harem..BUT..i also enjoy a good one on one romance...depending on whether one particular dame really stands above the others..which is Lyndie...either way...this is a quality game that should be on folks play-list.

 

[Avaron1974]

Yeah, I feel like we're gonna have to wait til we actually meet her to get a real read on the situation. The whole 'she doesn't like bootlickers' thing feels very at odds with 'bought an entire private school bc a teacher gave Aoife a bad grade'. There's something a bit more complex going on with her than just spoiled rich girl who grew up to run Hollywood.

With the whole 'disappeared as a teenager and then reappeared to take over Hollywood' thing, it's not exactly a huge leap to guess that's when Aoife was born, and I'm sure there's a pretty nuanced backstory in there somewhere.

It's one thing to make sure her daughter finished school with good grades but when talking to her face to face i'd imagine sucking up would piss her off.

I don't think her mother is spoiled, you don't take over an entire city on your own against what i'd assume to be powerful people if you're a spoiled rich kid.

I have no doubts she's a bitch but I think there is more to her.

She has a friend she's so close to they call themselves sister and treat each other like family. You don't get a friendship like that just being a bitch.

 

[clairdelune]

That ending intrigued me... I NEED THE NEXT UPDATEE RIGHT NOWW! XD

Great job dev<3

 

[Raptus Puellae]

That's what I was thinking as well. Feel like Aoifes mom is gonna be super pissed when MC escorts her to that Thanksgiving party.

Not sure.

Aiofe's mother hates people that suck up to her, he didn't. Not sure she'll hate him all that much. Probably won't like him but I don't think she'd like anyone Aiofe brought.

Yeah, I feel like we're gonna have to wait til we actually meet her to get a real read on the situation. The whole 'she doesn't like bootlickers' thing feels very at odds with 'bought an entire private school bc a teacher gave Aoife a bad grade'. There's something a bit more complex going on with her than just spoiled rich girl who grew up to run Hollywood.

With the whole 'disappeared as a teenager and then reappeared to take over Hollywood' thing, it's not exactly a huge leap to guess that's when Aoife was born, and I'm sure there's a pretty nuanced backstory in there somewhere.

It's one thing to make sure her daughter finished school with good grades but when talking to her face to face i'd imagine sucking up would piss her off.

I don't think her mother is spoiled, you don't take over an entire city on your own against what i'd assume to be powerful people if you're a spoiled rich kid.

I have no doubts she's a bitch but I think there is more to her.

She has a friend she's so close to they call themselves sister and treat each other like family. You don't get a friendship like that just being a bitch.

why do you all assume Aoife's mother would be an enemy? from what we know when MC met her during the interview she was glaring at him, and celebrieteis usually don't glare at people where it could be recorded... unless she was having the same reaction Lyndie had when meeting MC; she was staring daggers. Her change of behaviour and school influencing happened around the time MC was published, and Aoife's aunt called MC by his name... sure she's powerful and he was famous for a moment, but to connect a face to a name so quickly (and I don't think Aoife told her), could only happen if she had to hear lots of stuff about him. how could that happen? if aoife's mom didn't shut up about MC's book...
the meanest thing she'll probably say is saying that MC is not who he is supposed to be (due to his slump)

 

[Peserval]

Something To Write About: The Author [Ch. 3.1] compressed*

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

You must be registered to see the links

*This is unofficial version, compression lowers quality of Images/Audio/Video and can potentially break the game

 

[Avaron1974]

why do you all assume Aoife's mother would be an enemy?

I didn't.

I said she probably won't like him much.

She is the most powerful woman in one of the most influential cities in the world and the daughter she has groomed to be perfect from birth turns up to her party with a writer in a slump. Doesn't matter if she was a fan or not I could imagine she'd want different for her daughter and no mother starts off liking the guy (or girl) that is potentially fucking their offspring.

and Aoife's aunt called MC by his name... sure she's powerful and he was famous for a moment, but to connect a face to a name so quickly (and I don't think Aoife told her), could only happen if she had to hear lots of stuff about him.

Aoife's aunt probably checks up on who's hanging around her niece.

 

[Ironheart.]

his hand went through that giant bottle

 

[STWAdev]

his hand went through that giant bottle

Bruh, You're revealing the twist that he's half ghost early.

 

[Rinbael]

Bruh, You're revealing the twist that he's half ghost early.

Does that mean the ghostbusters update is next? I can't wait for Peter Venkman to be the next Love Interest.

 

[Avaron1974]

Does that mean the ghostbusters update is next? I can't wait for Peter Venkman to be the next Love Interest.

Plot twist, it's Ghostbusters 2016.

 

[Rinbael]

Plot twist, it's Ghostbusters 2016.

Damn it Avaron why to you have to ruin people's hopes all the time. Your like some kind of depression vulture hanging around waiting fly down and make people miserable.

 

[STWAdev]

I already posted it on Patreon, but I'm making a concentrated effort to keep at least an occasional update here because I know not everybody has the spare cash to toss towards Tiddy games.

Started work on Ch.4 today, anticipated release period is Sept 21st to Oct 5th depending on everything.

Additionally for those who don't Patreon I still appreciate ya folks! All I ask of you is to keep enjoying and I'll keep making, though if you like it consider leaving a review or grabbing a fan sig (if one pops up) all of those are great ways to support.

Sláinte!