I don't mind fictional setting such as the school allowing the students to run the school including expelling fellow students because I can accept that's the premise of the game. But when the game created a situation where the MC is broke and needs a job to make money, then got a job but easily quit the job before even the first day, that's illogical within the premise that the dev created themselves. What's worse is that there's the random flashback of the father telling MC to do what makes him happy, as if hinting MC should quit the cafe job because that isn't what makes him happy, only for MC to then become the personal assistant of someone he doesn't like who doesn't like him either, clearly a job that he hates even more than the cafe job.
There's almost nothing that makes sense in this game. That's why the game needs a massive rewrite, because the issue goes way beyond the wording.
Totally agree, I would have written the same thing in different words.
Although ... Let me be the
advocatus diaboli
Sadly, it's hard to give this benefit of the doubt to dev because IMO the problem goes beyond the written words/sentences. We don't need words to understand the action of the characters.
[1] MC still didn't bother coming to work on his first day despite being broke.
[2] Best friend still didn't try to find a job.
[3] They still somehow managed to rent a fully furnished apartment complete with the mess despite being broke.
[4] Cafe owner still fired MC due to him not showing up on his first day, but forced the niece to hire MC as her assistant.
[5] The celebrity with 73M followers (this is huge and way more followers than a lot of Hollywood celebrities, world class athletes, and IRL actual supermodels) is still unable to hire someone professional/competent to be her assistant.
None of the issues above is about wording/sentences.
[1] he had a rough night. And the morning.
[2] there are places on earth where an unmarried woman without a family has almost zero chance of finding a job. Outside the sex industry ofc.
[3] squatters? a very popular method in some places, mostly large cities. I wouldn't worry about the word "rented".
[4] this is a "macho" thing, we don't have to understand it.
[5] dev has a problem with numbers, especially zeros. Because what is "zero"? it's nothing, absolutely nothing! Change "73M" to 73000 and everything will be OK.
I don't want to argue!
I agree with what you write (mostly), I just show that there are other versions of reality ...