VN Ren'Py Abandoned The Tormented Witches [Chp.2] [SilverHare Studios]

4.50 star(s) 2 Votes

Silver Hare Studios

Newbie
Game Developer
Aug 23, 2022
29
135
why do they look 30+? arent they supposed to be in highschool/college?
Face and body textures are from the real-life models (in their early 30s) - I could really clean up the skin / remove wrinkles etc, but then they start to look a bit too 'generic' - will see what I can do for Chapter 2!
 
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Silver Hare Studios

Newbie
Game Developer
Aug 23, 2022
29
135
Ok I've played it through to the end and here are my comments for the Dev since I know he's around. I wrote them as I was playing so they might look like a mess (sorry) :


~Menu : Love that there is music. Love the menu's appearance, but the effect on the text when hovering it is a bit weird. While very cool, it's more cyberpunk-y than Hogwarts-y, a different hovering effect wouldn't be a bad thing, but all things considered, this one is extremely minor.

-Start doesn't feel like a start (aka you don't beging at the begining of the school year, an then things happen, you're thrown in the action head first)

-If you're the curious type and click the first grey hallow before the dialog actually tells you to, you'll end up skipping the whole first "scene" with hermione.

-Ginny's facial expressions are weird looking, her smiles are the worst.

-What's up with everybody always smiling with their teeth like it's the only expression of joy they know?

-Wearing high heels just makes them look even taller, while they should still be students.

+Multiple music, nice !

-"Were you not warned previously Miss Granger" instead of "We're you not warned previously Miss Granger" (spelling)

+Ginny actually looks a bit like a grown up version of the actress.

-What's up with snape's hair and robe alway floating behind him like he's constantly running even when standing still?

-"Minister for Magic" instead of "Minster for Magic" (spelling) (multiple times)

-Snape doesn't look like snape from the movies, hermione doesn't look like hermione from the movies, Dumbledore looks more like merlin than Dumbledore.

~First idle animation of hermione is a bit weird looking. I love idle animations, it makes a game stand from the rest, but the position of her arms are just weird.

+I like the use of sound effects like when Hermione coughs to wake Ginny up. (and the other afterwards, minus the "ouch" ones, these sounded very off)

-"Remain where you are, Miss Granger" instead of "Remain where you, Miss Granger" (spelling)

-It's weird that in some occasions you get to choose Hermione's dialog and in other you get to choose Dumbledore's

-Every bedroom scene is so lit up it's almost impossible to tell the time of the day. It makes it look like they're going to bed during the bright of day. Even when Hermione wakes up in the middle of the night, the whole room is still so well lit it's doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

-"Don't think this is a show for cheap compliments, Miss Granger" instead of "Don't think this a show for cheap compliments, Miss Granger" (spelling)

-Moaning Myrtle is creepy as fuck, dude.

There probably should be screen at the start of the game that explains around where we are in the story, and what's different about this one than in the original story (ex : Harry already killed Voldemort but Dumbledore is alive and Snape is still Teaching potions).

I'm a big Harry Potter nerd and really hope you succeed, Dev! Best of luck for the future, I'mma be waiting for future updates.
Firstly - thank you so much for taking the time to write this! It's honestly super helpful for me :) Summarised my actions on your feedback below.

1. Start / Flow of the game: I will add in an intro section (available from Chapter 2). And I'll fix the first grey hallow.
2. Ginny's face / expressions: I've used real-world textures so the tiling is a bit off - will fix for Chapter 2. Also will try to make them 'younger' without changing too much! Also will vary the expressions a lot more!
3. Spelling: Can't believe those slipped through the crack - apologies for that - will fix and improve for Chapter 2 - I'm writing everything directly in my IDE and don't have spellcheck built in (but no excuses)
4. Characters and movies: I didn't want to make the characters seem too much like the movies - bit nervous about using any real-person's likeness! Will see if I can improve the models a bit through.
5. Dialogue choices: I added choices for Dumbledore as I wanted a bit more variation for what Hermione would do in scenes. I'll try and keep choices to Hermione only for Chapter 2 (should be easy to work in).
6. Moaning Myrtle: I know she's creepy haha! It's super difficult to texture a character with 'translucent' shaders in Daz! Without giving too much away, planning to turn her into a 'real-life' person, so textures will improve dramatically then!
7. Snape's outfit/clothes: I couldn't find a better model for the hair tbh - for the clothes, I have recently figured out how to convert non-dforce clothes, so will improve for Chapter 2.
8: Lighting: I wanted the night bedroom scenes more visible but will try to darken for Chapter 2.

Thanks again Cpt_Crunch!
 

Silver Hare Studios

Newbie
Game Developer
Aug 23, 2022
29
135
now that is realistic body size
sadly its lesbian only game
Definitely not lesbian only! There will be 1 new male character next game (bringing the total to 3) and 2 more in Chapter 3. Apart from the 1 forced male interaction, you can choose to interact with whomever you want to (for Hermione)!
 

Joe Steel

Engaged Member
Jan 10, 2018
2,288
3,025
Firstly - thank you so much for taking the time to write this! It's honestly super helpful for me :) Summarised my actions on your feedback below.

1. Start / Flow of the game: I will add in an intro section (available from Chapter 2). And I'll fix the first grey hallow.
Please don't. This is a known world, so you don't need to introduce it, and the best stories start in the action and fill in the preceding details as you have. "Introduction" passages just take away storytelling time and bore the player. The player wants action. Plus, having a little bit of mystery at the start is a plus, not a minus.
 

Orphanus

Well-Known Member
Oct 25, 2019
1,033
1,608
There are plenty of lesbian scenes. both current and planned, hence the lesbian tag (as per the mod's suggestion to add it). Let me know if there is a different tag I should use!
Nah it's not about the tag, don't worry, this site doesn't have a more specific tag to discern games with (optional) lesbian protagonists from games just having a bunch of lesbian scenes. It's not your fault at all.
 
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JohnyShadow7

Member
Sep 27, 2019
118
65
I´ll definitely keep my eye on this, but really hope we can give the girls a youth potion or two.
Right now they look a bit too much like "old hags" than "sexy witches".

(Slightly exagerated, and I know the "problem" is being adressed. Just wanted to add my 2 cents.)

PS: Not sure about the idea of "forced" love interest. Ideally the player should always have a choice. I mean, I´m going to make them all massive sluts if I can, but the idea of "lesbian-only" is interesting for replayability. (But would add a lot of work.)
Of course, at the end of the day, it´s your game, so do whatever you want with it.
 
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SiuKim

Member
Jul 27, 2018
454
588
Also I agree with Joe Steel in regards to not dwelling on the intro too much. I get where Capt_Crunch is coming from, and there are games that do them really well (like Broken Dreamers and Being A Dik) but both are viable ways to start off imo. Maybe to mediate it you could have a few brief images of the school/setting with text appearing and floating around that give some sort of small introduction. Just an idea! Regardless, love where this is going. Oh yeah the music is great too
 
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Lele91

Newbie
Sep 2, 2017
43
85
Curious where this one will go, of to a good start! i do hope we will be able to avoid dick as much as possible, lesbian route svp!
 
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4.50 star(s) 2 Votes