There will be consequences from almost every attitude ( Mostly will depend on the characters ), but they need to be carefully worked out.
- Jun 13, 2022
- 1,069
- 3,903
Looks nice. Just please, don't make this another " Boner's Gone ". 5 years with no sex progression, hiding behind the " I want to tell you a great adult story ". 
- Jul 13, 2018
- 3,224
- 11,956
This looks and sounds pretty great from the overview and preview pictures. I'll definitely be giving this a playthrough.
I haven't played it yet, but if I enjoy it, I'd be happy to proofread the game for you. If it's really just minor grammatical errors, I'd proofread it free of charge. Should only take a couple hours, maybe a day, depending on my schedule. Feel free to message me if you'd be interested.
The LI's personality is so annoying ... Will there be a kind and loving LI?
- Oct 11, 2018
- 8,094
- 32,878
- Jul 31, 2017
- 1,562
- 4,588
It was... interesting? Renders are great, animations as well as transitions were nice. Feels very like the style of Ocean. A lot of closeup shots of everyone's faces most the time. But otherwise, it looks really nice. There are currently no choices, so it's just a kinetic novel at the moment. Assume that will change in later updates though.
As for the writing, it was kind of... eh. Some dialogues just didn't make sense and conversations were just weird. Just felt rather robotic. I don't know if it was due to bad translation or what, as there are some obvious translation issues in the dialogue where some lines just don't come across as they are meant to. It just lacked any emotion.
Overall, I think a better translation and some proofreading would help this out tremendously. While it looks fantastic, the writing didn't leave much to be desired. Still, wish you the best of luck with this going forward and thanks.
As for the writing, it was kind of... eh. Some dialogues just didn't make sense and conversations were just weird. Just felt rather robotic. I don't know if it was due to bad translation or what, as there are some obvious translation issues in the dialogue where some lines just don't come across as they are meant to. It just lacked any emotion.
Overall, I think a better translation and some proofreading would help this out tremendously. While it looks fantastic, the writing didn't leave much to be desired. Still, wish you the best of luck with this going forward and thanks.
At the moment, I've got an acquaintance of mine working on it.
- Jul 20, 2021
- 1,987
- 4,349
Hmm....I noticed there is no mention of a relationship type for this project.
What kind of relationship will MC have, …will it be a romance (player will be forced to pick a single love interest), or a dating path (a player can date multiple girls, with MC eventually being forced to choose one (or two or maybe three ) much later in the story)? Or will MC be a harem king (polly type relationship, where MC is the only dude that touches his girls), and has a choice to pursue them all...but ultimately the players will get the choice to decide who joins their big happy loving family?
Also, to save headaches in the forms...it's also important to mention at the start, if any of the controversial kinks (NTR, cheating, sharing, cucking, etc.) will be present in your story (in the future tags), and how they will handled going forward (avoidable=doesn't happen, or skippable=still happens, but off camera).
(FYI, if any of controversial kinks will be happening to MC's love interest(s), and are only skippable...that choice direction will not go over very well with in the AVN community. Just a friendly warning.)
Regards.
What kind of relationship will MC have, …will it be a romance (player will be forced to pick a single love interest), or a dating path (a player can date multiple girls, with MC eventually being forced to choose one (or two or maybe three
) much later in the story)? Or will MC be a harem king (polly type relationship, where MC is the only dude that touches his girls), and has a choice to pursue them all...but ultimately the players will get the choice to decide who joins their big happy loving family?Also, to save headaches in the forms...it's also important to mention at the start, if any of the controversial kinks (NTR, cheating, sharing, cucking, etc.) will be present in your story (in the future tags), and how they will handled going forward (avoidable=doesn't happen, or skippable=still happens, but off camera).
(FYI, if any of controversial kinks will be happening to MC's love interest(s), and are only skippable...that choice direction will not go over very well with in the AVN community. Just a friendly warning.)
Regards.
- Dec 3, 2023
- 31
- 456
Looks promising. You need a better proofreading and to improve the writing a bit.
Try to add some nuances to the dialogues, build the things up a little more, add a bit more pathos to the characters reactions. They accepted what happened with almost no reaction, everything happens too quick.
I'll keep an eye on the project for sure
Try to add some nuances to the dialogues, build the things up a little more, add a bit more pathos to the characters reactions. They accepted what happened with almost no reaction, everything happens too quick.
I'll keep an eye on the project for sure
I've played through the game now. I like the story so far, and I'd be happy to do a free proofreading.
The dialogue reads as if it was machine translated. Almost every line will need some tweaking to make it sound less robotic, and more natural. I should be able to finish proofreading within an hour or so.